Jacquie: I don't own a scale..I really want to get one..but will be afraid that I will obcess over it..lol...maybe once I get more serious about loosing.

Hippiemama: Your making me hungry lol. I need to try a good fahita recipie

Catherine: sorry about the tax troubles..ugh! That is alot of friggin money to loose.

Lost: I tried Yoga a few years back..I didnt get far. My biggest fear was breaking a hip lol

As for me: my uncle went to the ER yesterday. He was watching TV and next thing ya know he couldnt breathe and thought he was having a heartattack! The ER doesnt think it is his heart. They kept him over night for observation. Hubby and I went up and seen him. It is funny...he is my one uncle that complains about everything from the world to the caps on toothpaste! He always says he cant wait for God to call him home...BUT when he thought he was having a heart attack yesterday..he was scared. I told him..take it from me..if you complain about how bad life is...LIFE will show you!

Today we are getting all the decorations for our halloween/birthday bash.

Surgeon appt went great yesterday. He said my diarhea should get better and that I can add my fiber back in.

Ok, so I need to stop worrying about making the leap right back into the deep end and instead wade my way back out there from the shore. Step one, start coming back here every day and posting even if all I do is wave. How hard can that be?

So

I made decent choices at lunch (soup and salad) and just need to pick up some groceries on the way home. I had meant to do a big shopping run on Sunday, but my car died on me and I didn't get a chance. I should be able to go tomorrow night though and get myself stocked up with good stuff. One of my problems recently has been not doing enough prep with shopping and then not having anything good to eat in the house. I then either don't eat (not a good choice because it leads to bad choices later) or not such great choices to start with.

back at you Nancy

Hugs to you Nancy! Glad you are back in the deep end with us.

Luv,
Ratkity

Cyn - Sometimes I love the scale and I say that when I don't weigh myself a lot, other times it ticks me off as Heather said, it is a tool but not a very good one. I fully admit that there are times I do obsess, but before I go too deeply (heck at the beginning of my journey I was VERY obsessive lol) I usually throw some sort of stomping feet tantrum, like today, and then refocus lol. So, I threw my little "hmph" and am in MUCH better spirits about it lol. Vent = refocus lol. I need to remember that when I get stressed! The scale I have is Weight Watchers, glass, it is actually really nice.

Nancy - Welcome back!

Heather - Ty for your comments...made me recenter myself a bit.

***
Well I'm in better spirits this evening. Had my meeting today, threw on makeup, got all dressed up, threw on my hose and heels and went for it. It went well...I can actually walk better in my shoes now lol. I remember when I got them they would make my feet turn red if I stood too long. I also was heavier then, so I think I just fit into them better and I can actually walk better in them, so that is nice. I'm not sure I can wear them every day, or would, but it is nice to know I can wear some friggin' heels every once in awhile and they aren't even a high heel either. Kind of in between.

I did do my walk today, brisk short walk, but I had a certain amount of time to fit it in and made myself get up for it. :P Unfortunately my stupid BC pills are making me ill (started a new pack) and it hit me hard today, so I'm hoping that tomorrow I can get my walk in before I take them. No worries though, I totally expect the nausea and know what to do. Going to do two laps around, 60 minutes, with a tiny bit of jogging. Whoop Whoop!

I hope everyone is well. *HUGS*

Jacquie -- Glad to help. I think we all let the scale get to us more than we should sometimes!!

Nancy -- Good to see you back! Sounds like you've identified the next issue for you to get a handle on. When I get off track, I have to baby-step to get things back under control!

Hi everyone!

Well... my weight is up 3 lbs. Oops. No choice but to get right back on it though, right?
I have about a week's worth of smart for life cookies. Not the most nutritious and they taste like ****, but I think I am going to do it for a week just so I can get back to where I was.

The psychiatrist gave me klonopin which is really helping with the anxiety, but I think I might need a higher dose. She said I probably won't feel 'okay' until at least Christmas She is starting me on Zoloft soon as well. She did say it doesb't cause anywhere near the weight gain that Risperdal does though. *sigh*

I can do this right?

I see my friend/mentor tomorrow, and hopefully she will give me a pep talk. My mom was back from Florida tonight and I met her for dinner, and she was playing off my anxiety. My pastor invited me over for Christmas dinner, and my mom sai she would probably forget. And also that she said she would come to my graduation, and my mom said she probably wouldn't come to the convocation because it's too long, which kind of made me feel sad because I really hoped she would be there. I wanted my grandpa to be there in the audience, but he passed away a few months ago, so it would be lovely to hav e S there supporting me.

*sigh*

She said she would definitely come back for my grad but not sure if she meant the convocation or just to take me out for supper or something.

The things I obsess about...

Please guys promise me I can get back on track. I am feeling helpless and hopeless about everything in my life right now.

You can ABSOLUTELY do this!! Just think one day (or even one meal) at a time!!! Think about all the reasons you want and need it, and how all the little changes add up!!

Pink - I have often been within that feeling and you know we ALL struggle. I definitely struggle. I'm not one of those people who can report losing 100+ pounds in a year. Nope. I'm one of those people who struggled, working on their issues and then as I did that the weight would come off. However, that also meant I have moments or time periods where I do things that are counter productive or hurtful to myself. Like emotionally eating, which I still do, but not as much as I used to. I also have found that it isn't comforting enough, yet I still do it at times. I always stall or gain when I do that and the thing is I never question that I WILL lose my weight, it is a matter of WHEN.

Heather is right, you can do this and taking one day at a time or even one meal as she says is a good idea. Not only is it positive, but you won't get overwhelmed. When I'm in my most positive moments I'm just living...I don't fixate on the scale, I don't fixate on my weight, I just eat and live and grow. When I start to get negative, that is when I struggle and then I have to take the time to work that through. It isn't wasted time either...it is valuable time that I work on myself from within and then I can refocus. Hopefully that makes sense...

You can totally do this. *HUGS*

Nancy HI!!!! SO good to 'see' you, did the thread asking where you were spur you into coming back? You have been missed so much, I've often wondered where you were & what you were up to.xxxxxxxxxx
I lost 1lb, not sad, not happy, a loss is better then a gain, feeling okay,. I'm sure that the HRT is helping me feel more energetic.
Pink hope you are feeling a bit better now, boy the amount of times I've fallen off the diet waggon. You CAN do it!!!! You'd better do it or I may have to send my boys 'round!!!!!! LOL they would wear you out so you're too tired to eat, lolxxxxxxx
xxxxxsharon

PINK: you can do this..but try and take small steps. When I started trying to loose that is what i did. I am sort of an all or nothing person, and that would lead me to getting mad if I didnt do it "all". Then after comming here and gettting to know these ladies, I decided to take things in small steps. So I started with smaller things like..only 1 soda at work..instead of 2. I started bringing my lunch to work and only eating out once a week. I think sometimes we want to jump in with both feet and have the all or nothing attitude. We didnt get this heavy overnight..it took time...we didnt eat healthy all our lives then one day start eating crap! It took time..years for some of us.

So start with the small..embrace those goals..don't worry about the up and down scale! You can do it!!

Good morning ladies...today is a good day! I just finished my 55 min extreme fit workout and i feel great..my husband told me last night that every week he is seeing changes in me...and last but not least the scale this morning says that i have lost 2.5 lbs of the 5 lbs that i gained last week ( i think some of that was water weight from TOM cause it showed up this week) and i still have 4 days before i weight in cause mondays are my new weigh-in day and i would really like to lose another 2.5 lbs but we will see what happens i will be happy as long as i lose something this week!

Well, gotta run talk to you girls later
Heather