I've spent my Thanksgivings alone with my mother since my father died in 2008 just a few days before Thanksgiving, and we haven't figured out a new tradition. It used to be cozy with just the three of us. To avoid the hellish day-before-Thanksgiving exodus out of the TriState area, I'd drive Upstate on the day itself, often through a light snowfall, catching "Alice's Restaurant" on a couple radio stations along the way. On the day after, we'd go to the Montezuma Wildlife Refuge to see migrating swans, geese and ducks, and stay away from any stores. My father loved taking out the very nice spotting scope that I'd gotten him and having a look at whatever was hanging out on the various ponds there.

Since that year, we've been limping along with our mother-and-daughter reunion. This year I'm indecisive. I have new trainees who'll be using me as a help desk during their first week in the Boston office for that short Thanksgiving week. I had therefore planned to drive Upstate on the weekend before and work from my mother's house. I even paid to enter a Turkey Trot on Thanksgiving morning.

But my mother ordered a custom mattress & box spring for me, for my sleigh bed, since that kind of work is cheaper to get done Upstate than down here. And since the place called & said it was ready, she drove to the factory and they loaded it into her van. She wants to travel down here and deliver it. So it would make sense to change the Thanksgiving venue to downstate. I don't really want to do that, though. I really wanted a break, which I won't get if I am hosting the holiday. I am not up to cleaning this week before her arrival. Also I am comically at a loss about what we'll do when she's here. The last thing I want to do is join the throngs on the trains headed downtown for the parade, the tree-lighting and Black Friday sales. But she's definitely got to get that mattress out of her van, and I need it -- I've spent 18 months in my renovated apartment sleeping in the guest bedroom, waiting for my bed to be usable again.

As usual, when faced with a choice like this, I've frozen in place. Probably I will just let my mother drive down here.

Birchie, if you need someone to Google, make it Rachel Maddow instead. Ann Coulter gives me the heebeegeebees.

saef Funny how people view things so differently. I've always, always wanted to see the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade in NYC in person. I would even consider spending the night on the street with the balloons as I find them fascinating. No way to do it though as you are completely right about the hellishness of travel during that time. To say nothing of watching people all spending time with family while I would be a single stranger.

Dagmar

Saef-- it seems to make sense for your mom to come to you this year. New traditions perhaps?

I'm slightly grouchy at the scale this morning and trying not to be. I worked out twice on Saturday and the scale was down a bit yesterday. I also worked out twice yesterday and was hoping the scale would be further down today. Nope. It's up. Seriously?! I ate nothing off plan all weekend. Sigh. Stupid scale. I'm thinking it's my personal plumbing issues.

If it helps at all, I am in this same boat. I have a small NIH grant ending soon and the expectation is that this was to be a stepping stone to an R01. But I will have no R-award of any type to show for my efforts. I'm cranking out an R21 application at this moment but with no real hope of success.

We cannot hold this against ourselves.

Thought I was doing myself a favor and had sushi for dinner on Sunday. I got burned by the seaweed salad, unfortunately - it never occurred to me to read the label, and when I got done, there it was ... blue and yellow. Result, Monday at 155. Tuesday at 154.5. I'm just not going to look any more this week. I'll know it's better when my finger isn't puffed up beyond my wedding ring.

ICU - "blue and yellow"? I don't get it.

Andrea, the "blue and yellow" was a quick reference to my artificial color sensitivities - I bloat up 3-4 pounds in a matter of hours and it takes a few days to get it back off. With that sort of negative reinforcement, I'm usually quick to flip something over and check it. In retrospect I remembered that when I visited S Korea, the seaweed salad wasn't nearly that green. Lesson learned!

I haven't weighed in at all this week but I still feel ... fluffy. Better, at least. Thinking that TOM is slowing things down, and I'm simply going to wait until Monday to climb back on the scale. Drinking lots of green tea, eating single-ingredient foods lightly, and LOTS of water.

I haven't been in the pool for a week; the power went out at the HS on Sunday night and they just got the heaters turned back on yesterday afternoon. There was a practice scheduled for last night, and I wussed out because I have some experience with how cold that water was going to be! Saturday morning - two hours, no excuses!

ICU when WholeFoods came to town I was so excited to have a source for seaweed salad. I bought it, brought it home, and only then looked at the ingredients... I don't understand why seaweed salad has to be spoiled with food coloring. Ick.

A lot of hard work this week and abstemiousness ... including ducking out of a "networking dinner" ... and down just .2 pounds from last Friday.

And no time for gym today.

I'm thinking about going back to three meals a day, with no eating between meals. When I did a lot of heavy lifting (and frequented the Ladies Who Lift board) I started eating five small meals a day to fuel the muscle growth. Nowadays I do less lifting* and having M2 and M4 seem to be turning into 'eat what you like, as and when' sessions.

* Who said we have to be internally coherent? I am just starting to get back into heavier lifting in an attempt to burn off this accursed avoirdupois. So where does that leave me? It's a rhetorical question.

Tired and sad at the gym this morning.

I'm recovering from wearing painful high heels to the office & then to dinner that same night --and after the dinner, our high-energy gym manager/trainer decided we had to walk the length of a long, long shopping center and run into Dick's Sporting Goods to get gloves & headbands for tomorrow's race. I was limping badly by the time we got out and waited in one place for them to bring the care around.

And feeling terribly guilty for missing out on the gym last night, which nearly poisoned my work there this morning.

Just tired today, with a lot to do, and sort of dreading tomorrow's race, because of the forecast of bitter temperatures and flurries.

saef To me it seems like there isn't a lot of "fun" in your workouts.They are a chore and an obligation from what I read in some of your posts. I know, from your posts, that you are very pleased with the results. Maybe you could take something like "zumba" once in awhile - I hear that's an energetic and uplifting workout. Take some of the dreariness out of your gym time.

And not doing a workout (as I discovered when moving threw my routines all to h*ck ) isn't so bad. My body didn't fall apart when weights and yoga were missed for a month. It's a little less strong and flexible but that's a short term thing.

Dagmar

saef, I don't know if your area of New York does winter like mid Michigan does, but we can go a week without a ray of sunshine this time of year and the total slog of months yet to come. "Tired and sad" is very common. 3 people in my cube row have the full-spectrum bright lights at their desks, and my boss is a firm believer in a once-a-week visit to the tanning beds all during the winter, just for the light and warmth. It's really easy to fall into a case of the "glums". Hope your race went okay and things are looking up this week!

silver, no need to be coherent. "Adapt, innovate and overcome."

I am struggling to get free of the Sugar Demon. Trying to do it this week is not the best choice, but waiting til Friday sounds even worse. Gads, I'd almost forgotten the mindless prowling and sudden shock of finding normally unattractive foods absolutely irresistible.