Mary, I am glad the doctors are able to see Joe so quickly. I am praying that whatever this is, they are able to treat it with success and he is soon well again. Is he still having a lot of pain? If so, I hope the pain meds help.

You take care of yourself, too, and we will be here for you if you need to talk.

{{{{Hugs}}} for you and Joe.

Mary, I'm praying for you and Joe....

Good morning! Carole Sue, the pain is always there however at times it's not so bad, at other times it's terrible.

Deelou - Thank you for your prayers. Yesterday I also requested prayer from our church prayer team.

I'm hoping it will be something treatable and not too hard on him. He has had two surgeries already this year and his incision is still not completely healed, so I just hate the thought of him having another. I don't know what they can do if it is scar tissue and I suppose the cancer treatment will depend on how far advanced it is, so I really hope it is not that. Praying the surgeon will be able to tell us more.

Much to do today, so need to get started. You all have a good day!

Mary, I am continuing to remember you and Joe in my prayers. Since Joe has been under the doctor's care so much lately, I'm surprised this problem wasn't discovered sooner. I hope Joe is resting comfortably and that the visit with the surgeon goes well. It's a shame he has to go through so many tests and doctor visits, just to find out what's going on.

My weight was down 1/2#, better than nothing. We didn't go to church again. I'm hoping we can make the Christmas eve service. It will be a short service so easier on dh hopefully. He's had less pain recently but his incision hurts too so poor guy he's never completely pain free. His had a low-grade temp last night but it's ok this morning. I'm planning on going out for that haircut I keep talking about and never getting.. and picking up a few groceries too. Our son is here to stay with dh.

How are you guys doing? Strange to have such a small group after having a larger one for so many years. Are you ready for Christmas? I found a gift I hadn't yet wrapped, forgot about it, and wrapped it yesterday, so now I am done with the gifts. My son helped me pull out the sofa bed and oh my it was messy on/behind it! I cleaned it all up and remade the bed so it's ready for the kids. Also pulled out the trundle bed in my office and remade it so ready for children. I dusted in our bedroom and straightened up my closet so felt I got quite a bit done yesterday. If I get time I think I'll clear up my computer files today. When the kids get here I just make ham sandwiches if they are hungry.

I am ready for Christmas, as much as I can be so far. All gifts are bought. 2 are not wrapped yet, but I'll get that done this evening. Today I wrote up my menu to make sure I have everything and don't forget anything. It seems like every holiday I find some food item I forgot to put out, so I will check things off the list. I still have to get the vegetables for my vegetable tray but I want them to be fresh so I will get them on Tuesday.

DH and I don't usually exchange gifts because when we want something we just get it, but we wanted to get a new bigger TV so we got that today. He wanted a 50 inch Samsung and I opened the Target ad this morning and they had it on sale so we went right away. So I guess that is our Christmas present.

Tomorrow we are watching our grandson again. There is no school. I won't be able to get much done with him here because he wants constant attention.

I hope you finally got to get your haircut, and I hope Joe has a good night.

Weathered another party well....now if I can hang tight on Christmas and the week of New Years as our whole family gathers for a family celebration of our 50 years then I'll go into the new year maintaining...I'm done with gifts and except for hubby's birthday the 23 rd...all wrapped....Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah!

Deelou, that's all we can do, get through one party at a time. Luckily, the only get-together I have to get through is Christmas Day at my house, so if I eat too many of the wrong foods, I have no one to blame but myself! LOL

Mary, how did the doctor's appointment go yesterday?

Yes I finally got my haircut! LOL To update you on dh: he was able to get in Monday for the pulmonary function test and then on Tues, he saw the pulmonary surgeon. We found out that the hospital docs didn't tell us the truth...there was something significant on the Cat Scan. He has a mass in the left pleura. He said it's possible it is a large blood clot and if it is, he can clean it out but it also may be a mesothelioma, caused by asbestos exposure. I cannot imagine when he could have formed the blood clot because neither of us remember any accident/trauma to his chest, however he did work with asbestos long ago. He only actively worked with it a few hours one day but he was exposed to it in a building for about ten years. If it is a tumor, he cannot remove it. He said there are some doctors who do "extreme" (his word) surgery for these type tumors but he does not. So all he will do is remove some tissue for biopsy to determine what it is for sure. He will have a chest tube afterwards for a while. So he is now scheduled for this next Monday. He hardly has any lung pain now...but he is short of breath and very very fatgued. Funny thing the day he went to the surgeon he seemed much stronger but was a little sob. He eats very little and is continuing to lose weight and I feel like he is getting weaker and weaker right before my eyes. He chills a lot and sits by the fire most of the time, nods off to sleep now and then. I realize that he is almost 80 and has had a full life but he still has things he wants to do so it is very hard. The fact that he has always been very active and this came on so suddenly makes it even harder for me to grasp. I keep thinking it's a bad dream and I'll wake up soon. The kids and I are definitely not ready for him leaving us. If it is a tumor, they likely will treat him with radiation and maybe chemo but I am not sure of the effectiveness. I trust God to do what is best, but I have to admit I want him to be well again NOW and stay with me....and I am very emotional right now. I try to stay positive and hope that it is a blood clot, but he has all the symptoms of the other so it is not easy. I have worked hard and made a good Christmas for the kids and gk, and all my food turned out good (except I didn't like the meat balls). Don't think I've ever made a better beef roast, plus I remembered dhs been asking for honey baked ham, but I got there too late and they ran out so I got a brown sugar glazed ham. It was really good too. I have lots of leftovers so meals should be easy for the rest of their visit. I'm eating but have lost a little weight probably due to the work and stress. The kids are trying to be supportive but they have caused some stress too...still they help him with things like making a fire and other things that are usually things he does and I think it is good they are spending time with him. Our local dd came over and they rolled lumpia together and he enjoyed that. The visiting son and fam all had colds when they arrived and now our older son has a cold too. So hoping dh and I don't catch it as there is not much time now before the surgery. Most of the pain he is having now is in his abdominal incision. I do not understand it...it is not quite healed yet but shouldn't be hurting that much after two months. The doc did say complete healing of the colon will take 6 mo, but it is hurting more now than it was! I wish there were more time to get the colon doc to check it out again before this surgery but they advised us not to delay this new surgery.

So, I'm a bit overwhelmed but thank you listening and praying. His fam is now aware and praying too.

Mary, I don't even know what to say. It seems so insignificant to say that I'm sorry to hear all this, and I am still praying. It broke my heart to read your post. I am praying that whatever it is, DH will get well and stay with you. There is no way to prepare for something that comes on so quickly like this. I don't understand why the ER doctors misled you. If there was something significant on the Cat Scan they should have told you even if they didn't know what it was. It's hard to second guess what they were thinking.

Doesn't it seem significant to you that this was the year that all your children were able to come home for the holidays? It would have been much better if Joe had felt better, but I think getting to spend quality time with his whole family has to be therapeudic for him. And being there and seeing him gives them more of a sense of how serious his illness is.

I think whatever this is, it's causing his immune system to be compromised and keeping his abdominal incision from healing properly. I think his colon is probably OK Mary, and this upcoming surgery is more urgent.

When you say he will have this done next Monday, do you mean this coming Monday, Dec 29? or Jan 5?

I know you have a lot on your mind right now and you're busy with all your family there. Please keep us posted when you can.

{{{hugs}}}

MARY, praying now and onward for both of you!!! What a lot to contend with and the anxiety must be off the charts as well. Please write whenever you feel like it and know we are praying and listening, too.

Carol Sue, I agree that Mary's children coming home this time is really a blessing for all concerned.

All calm here in our home of 3. So fortunate that we get along so well. We went to Christmas Morning Mass with 30 minutes of singing Christmas Carols before the 10:00 service. All 3 of us were there with just the Choir at first, not wanting to miss a moment of singing such old favorites. This was the 3rd Service (one 5:30 pm Christmas Even for Children, noisy and crowded, one at 10:00 PM with the most young people but also full.

May each of you feel the peace of Christmas in spite of what life throws at us.

Another gd is coming tonight to join us. She is my only married gc and my oldest son's dd. I haven't seen her for at least a year so will be good to see her. We are having leftovers tonight from the holiday meals plus I fried up the lumpia that dd and dh made a few days ago. Dh and I had it for lunch but the others didn't want any, so have plenty left. I'm making rice to go with the Filipino foods and a veggie stir-fry.

Today has been a better day for dh. He even walked about in the back yard and showed our sons some things he'd like them to do for him. He has had very little pain but is still short of breath, but not too bad. He said last night he was even able to sleep on his right side which usually hurts him.

I don't know why the hospital doctors and the ER doc and pulmonologist didn't tell us about the mass. I am assuming they weren't sure and wanted the surgeon to tell us, but the surgeon said he wished they'd called him in because he could have had this surgery done during that hospital stay and have it behind him now. But I believe that all things we go through happen for a purpose so it's ok...just found out that he now has to check in at 5:30 am instead of the 8 they originally told us. Ugh, hate to get up so early. He has to take an antibacterial shower Sun night, and I have to change the sheets before he goes to bed, then in am he has to take another antibacterial shower. He had to do this with the colon surgery too so guess it is common procedure now. I'm ok, dh is actually very calm about it and thinks positive, probably more than I, but last night as I lay in bed praying I suddenly felt this calm come over me and it has remained. However it turns out it will be ok.
You maybe right about his immune system, Carole Sue, hadn't thought of that. It certainly is messing up his temperature regulator...he chills sometimes, is too warm sometimes (more rare) and has night sweats every night now.

Thanks for your supportive comments.

I agree that it would have been better to have all this taken care of while he was in the hospital, but like you said, things happen for a reason. I think he may not have had the nice time with his family if he had been recovering from surgery. I am glad both you and DH are calm about this. I think it makes a difference. When I had my heart surgery it was unexpected, but I felt very calm about it. I couldn't change anything, so I just put it in God's hands and trusted him to do what's best. It's hard to understand things sometimes, but it's all part of His plan.

Prayers are continuing.

There are now 11 of us here as our oldest son's children came. They slept in the living room, two on sofa and love seat and one on an air mattress. It was nice to see them all again. Dh is almost pain free right now, just is a little sob still. It's strange how the symptoms go and come in intensity. He wants to go to church tomorrow so will see how he feels in the morning. The surgery time was changed to having to check in at 5:30 am...oh I hate that...8 am was such a nice decent time! The boys want to join me at the hospital to wait the surgery out and hear what the doc has to say. I warned them it may not be much as may take a couple days but they want to be there when he wakes up etc. and I understand and am glad they care.

I'm at the point where I hate putting out the leftover holiday food.....I think they are getting tired of it. Most are kind of picky eaters, but I've decided to serve what I can and if they don't like it they can fix their own or go out to eat.

Mary, I agree that this is not the time for you to be catering to your grown children. You are going through enough, worrying about Joe while having a house full of guests, even though they are your children. I think they understand, and are probably worried, too.

It's possible that the doctor will be able to give you some type of answer right after the surgery. Will Joe remain in the hospital, or will it be out-patient? That is a very early time to have to be at the hospital, but it's likely that you won't get much sleep anyway.

I hope Joe feels well enough to go to church. He probably feels that it's where he should be right now, and it will do him good. Just play it by ear. God will definately understand if he doesn't feel up to it.

Glad that Joe is pain free right now. It's a good sign, I think.

Take care, Mary.