The biggest thing I remember is feeling totally and completely out of control. Every time I would try and diet I would only make problems worse by immediately having horrible cravings. That is the most amazing part of my feeling now - that I do have control to make the changes I need to. It is totally empowering.

Yep! I use to wonder and it took me 10 years to come up with an answer and it is to long of a story. It has a mixter of not having an active child hood after 9 years old(which wasn't my fault, I was an active child, I just did not have a place to run)

I ended up with self low esteem and depression through my teenage years, I ate out of comfort and bordom, I was pure lazy about dieting when I was dieting through my early and mid 20s, and it took me until I was 27 or 28 years old to get a clue what I need to do.

Today I am on track!

I gained 50 lbs. on Lithium. I'd probably be pushing 200 now if I hadn't found a different med.

But man, I remember growing up in rural Wisconsin with lots of large ladies as family and friends, and thinking, I'll never gain that much weight! All I have to do to avoid gaining is not put so much food in my mouth! Then three years ago I was only two pounds shy of obese.

After high school, my weight just seemed to steadily increase. I did do WW in college and got back to a normal weight. Then, I had a baby and put on several lbs. after he was born. This time I went to a weight loss center and shed a few lbs. but didn't stick to the program and all I really lost was a lot of hard-earned money. Had second child and put on more weight after she was born. Went on diet pills and lost 90 lbs. but gradually gained it all back after stopping these meds. This is the reason that this time I am determined to learn how to eat and exercise to keep the weight off. I know that some of my weight gain has been due to being on steroids for my liver disease, but this med. didn't shove the food down my throat. Mostly I think I was too busy caring for my kids and working full-time to take proper care of myself. I am a stay-at-home mom now and it sure helps to be able to carefully plan my meals and my exercise. Like everyone else in here, I never planned to be fat, it just happened. I am happy that now I am finally doing something about it, and believe enough in myself that I know I can succeed.

Basically... I just got too comfortable. I knew that I should lose weight, but I didn't have the motivation to do so. I had people who loved me, a good job and had never had medical results that suggested I should lose weight. Simple.

I only ever really tried to lose weight about 4 times. Never really seriously and one of those was only because I was living with relatives who cooked healthy meals for me. I wasn't actually doing anything for myself.

I am so VERY grateful that something clicked just over two years ago and I wanted to spend MANY more years with my new husband of 3 and a half years. Otherwise, I hate to think of where I would be now.

Funnily enough, on a side note, I don't think I ate WAY too much, although I certainly ate more than I should have. I just ate the wrong things. I have done a lot of reading up on nutrition in the last year or so and I now know that my body just doesn't 'like' certain foods, and I was feeding them to it on a daily basis for a LONG time. I still eat a lot, and regularly, but I eat 'clean' food, with as little processed food as possible. It has made all the difference in the world. It is amazing how I didn't even realise that fruit and vegetables have such delicious flavous in their raw state.

This has been an interesting thread to read.

Take care all,

Zelma

You know Zelma, I probably could have lost weight alot faster than I did if I would have just stopped getting comfortable. What would happen is, I would diet until I found someone. I would get a boyfriend and get comfy and just stop. The same thing kept on over the years. This time its different, I catch myself getting comfortable but then I snap out of it. My mind has become so much stronger the older I get. It truely is mind over matter. Hard to not listen to your brain though.

Not really my weight, but definitely my food. What I mean by that is, I never used to eat so much. After starting college (and about a year into a relationship with my ex-boyfriend who was pretty heavy), I started eating huge portions. Sometimes now I look at my plate and wonder "what the heck happened??? How did I get to eating THIS MUCH?!" I never used be able to eat this much before...now I'm really working on those portions, but it's hard since I got so used to it. It's also hard cuz those were portions of BAD food...especially Chinese. Mmm...vegetable lo mein. That stuff is the !

Me too. I started eating more when I went to college. Hello freshman 15!

Beer didn't help either.

It came as a HUGE shock to me. It's like I have freakin anemsia (sp?). I know a big part of it has to do with my depression, I feel like if I had even bothered to look in a mirror, I would have noticed and been able to stop it before I even reached 200. But I didn't and it's depressing as always so I'm not gonna think about it.

I think for me it was the same as alot of people. I would say to myself "well Im already fat, I might as well just eat more" Food was and still is my best friend. It always has been. I eat when Im bored, when Im happy, when Im sad. I think now I've just learned the kinds of foods I can and should be eating.

For me it was a lot of things. I did have a big problem with my thyroid and some other health issues. Those didn't help my weight but they are not the sole reason why I put on major weight. I do agree with Zelma about getting comfortable. And for me to I got depressed. The bigger I got the more depressed I got. I hovered at 200-220 for about 3 years. Then I got sick and then I got depressed. And in a year and a half I gained 100 pounds.I have been at 330 for about 2 years now. And it can happened so fast. With eating junk and being depressed. And of course most of the reason I was depressed was because of my weight! So now I am just fed up with feeling terrible and I have to start tackling my weight. I also wanted to say it is so scary how fast you can put on weight and how you think it will never be you. At 180 I never thought I would see 200. At 200 I never thought I would see 250. At 250 I never thought I would see 300. And now at 330 I am amazed I let myself stay this way for so long!

michelle

I definitely know why I gained the weight....When I started dating my husband, it was my senior year and I was at around 135-138. We would eat out like every weekend and I just didn't make the right choices on food. Then when we moved in together about 2 years later, we would get fast food like everyday ....and once again I didn't make the right choices. I was also going through a lot because my mother had passed away in 2003, so that caused some of the weight gain. Since it was basically food that caused my weight gain, it has been really easy for me to lose the weight, and I know that I will never gain it back.

I know in my mind how, Emotions and stress and depression, but in my heart I dont
But them in my mind I dont feel 50 nor for the most part feel like I am over 300 lbs
sandi

I think it's the emotions. It's like in SuperSize Me how he starts to crave the McDonalds food and he'll be kind of down, but then when he eats it he's kind of up again. I think it's easy for our bodies to get that kind of addiction to fat and sugar, not to mention how "easy" fast food or sweets are as opposed to the excuses we make for not cooking something healthy. I think though that I always did (and still do when I eat poorly) have some small hope that eating that ice cream will cheer me up. I don't know if I'll ever break out of it completely, but I've got to hope I'll find some more satisfying way to tap into my inner happiness.

I think for me it was that food was my only comfort growing up. I started eating more in 3rd grade and didn't stop. I never have felt that I had a good friend like food was for me. I think I also put blinders on and lived in denial about my weight. I knew I needed to lose some lbs and inches, but just kept putting it off thinking that if I didn't focus on it, then it wasn't a problem.

Now I'm married and have two wonderful little boys. I realized that I now have my best friends and all food is doing to be is hurting me. I have the comfort and support from them and don't need it from food anymore. Now the only problem is breaking those really bad habits I got myself into. That is truely the hardest part for me. But I try to focus on being healthy and in better shape to enjoy my hubby and kids more.