I'm sorry for your loss, Ravenwolf.

For me, I've known I needed to lose weight since I was 6 or 7. I've always tried dieting every few months, yo-yoing between 5-10 pounds, then gaining more when I went off it. This is my first time losing more than 10 pounds and sticking to it long-term. What really hit me was turning 21. I still feel like my teen years are wasted. I can't even go to college because I have no self-esteem and would be lonely because I don't know how to make friends and I wouldn't be able to enjoy it the way I want to. I just finally hit the point where anything seems worse than not trying. I can't waste all my 20's too.

I spent like 2 years hibernating, after regaining weight I had lost. I'm freelance, so I took the jobs that came to me, but felt too insecure to go out and pursue new clients. It doesn't help that I work in an appearance-conscious industry (fashion)--although you can be fat and be successful--but it was also just me feeling bad about myself. Finally, I realized that I only have a certain amount of time left before I age out, and wanted to give myself the best shot possible. (FWIW, my high weight is about 154--or 50+% larger.)

[QUOTE=lunarsongbird;4625658]It's awesome that you are training for a 5K! Maybe you'd like to jog a heart run in honor of Laura. Also- the American Hearth Association's National Walking Day is on April 3rd. Why don't you post a thread about it as the time comes closer? I'll certainly lace up my walking shoes and walk 30 minutes that day in honor of Laura! You could have people from all over the world walking for health, love and friendship in honor of her memory!

http://www.heart.org/HEARTORG/Gettin...65_Article.jsp



QUOTE]

OMGosh this brought tears to my eyes! It would mean so much to me! Thank you so very much!

Thank you everyone for sharing back with me!

I remember so many nights, lying in bed and dreaming about how I was going to lose the weight. I would lay there forever and make a plan, get hyped up and motivated, and then I would never start the next day...

I tried "officially" with Nutrisystme once, but I was still breast feeding and I cut too many calories. When my milk supply started wavering, used it as an excuse to stop the diet.

When I started my successful weight loss journey, I had just gone to Starbucks and gotten a 400-cal coffee and breakfast sandwich. Something just snapped and I decided I needed to keep track of what I was eating. I started THAT DAY keeping a food journal. A good friend had just lost all her baby weight, and I felt like crap because my "babies" were three and five and I was still very large. She was so sweet and worked out with me almost everyday for the first month.

For me, it wasn't anything as dramatic. I had JUST gone out and bought some new "fat" clothes two weeks earlier (this was in January)--then 2 weeks later i found that even THOSE didn't fit!! I panicked--i thought, it's ok if i don't even lose weight, but i can't continually GAIN weight!

But i also realized that i will never be able to severely diet. It's not sustainable. I have to be patient. So in my head, i keep telling myself it's fine if i'm not losing (which i won't, on a day-to-day basis)--i just have to not gain.

I will walk that day for Laura too. I live in a beautiful neighborhood and I swear the heavens open up with sunshine when I am out staring at the sky while I walk.

Marking my calendar right now.

I semi decided on the way home from my trip out East this summer. I was too fat to keep up with my friends (when we went down and stood on the ocean floor at Hopewell Rocks, I stayed all of like 3 minutes so that they wouldn't see how long it took me to climb back up the stairs), and my feet were swollen and sore and I was miserable a lot of the trip. Still, even though I picked up a "goal" hoodie somewhere in New York State, it was still only a half baked plan.

When I got home though, the announcement of two weddings, one for a family member and one for a friend who snubbed me as a bridesmaid due to my weight kicked me in to action. I started on August 1st of last year.

I didn't really have anything major or sudden happen to me - I just finally got tired of being fat and feeling bad about myself. When I saw some pictures of myself compared to old "thin" pictures of myself I knew I would stick with it. I want to see that cute girl again!

New Years 2011. Everyone happy and here I was fat and depressed and never trying hard enough filling my notebook with stuff I dreamed of. Also, I liked someone. (we're still together and I'm much healthier) :]

I came back from a holiday and saw the photos!

I looked horredous and realised enough was enough - I didn't want to be the fat one in the pics anymore.

Even in a bad photo now, I look so much better than I ever did in my old 'good' photos.

I'm so sorry for your loss, RavenWolf. I will definitely walk in honor of Laura as well.

I've been heavy all my life and while I've made several attempts at losing weight, I haven't really stuck to it. I've been exercising regularly for 2 months now and watching my calorie intake for 1 month, which is longer than any previous weight loss attempt. Unfortunately, the reason I've made more of an effort this time is because I was diagnosed with diabetes and PCOS. There's a history of diabetes on both sides of my family, so I knew I was especially at risk, but it never scared me enough to kick my butt into gear. I'm sad to say it took actually getting diabetes to make me change my lifestyle.

You are all amazing, and knowing you are willing to walk for my friend is so heart warming!

I am so glad and thankful to you all for taking the bull by the horns and working to become healthy! It is so important! I just want to say "Thank you for taking care of you!"

Ravenwolf: So sorry for your loss. April 3 is now on my calendar as well. I will take the whole family for a walk that day.

As for what made me finally do it, I finally ran out of excuses. I've wasted enough years saying "if only I were smaller". This is my year to become what I've wanted.

There were two things that put me on the road to weight loss. Both of which happened on Super Bowl Sunday of last year (February 5, 2012, a little more than a year ago). Anyway, the first was my niece's baptism. I was the godfather, and there were a lot of pictures taken, (one is below), and I just didn't like the way I looked. I was too big. Now, I had quit smoking about a month and a half before this, so I was expecting to gain some weight, but in this picture I weighed too much to be able to just brush it off.

Then, that evening, I was at the bar with a buddy of mine, and he told me that he had recently been diagnosed with diabetes. He'd always been a bigger guy too, bigger than me, and I was very afraid that I was going to follow in his footsteps, and I didn't want that. I didn't want that at all. And I put tow and two together: Keeping this weight on will have a significant effect on my health. It is time to lose it.

I can't say, though, that I started losing weight that very day. It always takes me some time to motivate myself to start something big. It was actually about two months later when I started to really takes things seriously. But for me it all goes back to Super Bowl Sunday of last year.