How is the spouse taking the changes?

You're on Page 2 of 2
Go to
  • Quote: Augh, my guy said something very similar to me a couple months ago. I replied, "Maybe you should have been nicer to me when I was fat." Let other guys look. Flirt some even. It boosts the self-esteem and a little bit of jealousy makes our other halves appreciate what they have.
    I want a like button on these forums! I like your post!
  • Oh yes, my BF got livid during my weight-loss last year. "You're going to look how you did when we started dating and you're going to leave me!". Well, the year went on, we had always had problems, I did get back down to where I was whenever we started dating but the breakup wasn't weight-related at all. We couldn't work through our other long standing issues and his jealousy over the weight thing was the tipping point. I said "You know, you only got worried about my fidelity and wanted to Put A Ring On It whenever I got thinner. That's not a good basis for marriage and we have had so many other issues you aren't working with me on. This is silly."

    And you know? I've been single since early this year and his fears I'd go out and wildcat it up because I'm thinner have yet to be made true. How shocking, right? Getting my weight back under control and dealing with my issues has helped give me confidence I've needed for years and any guy who can't handle I have a human form that fluctuates with illness, pregnancy, age, laziness - they can kiss my rear.
  • Amen to that, 586!!!

    I'm not married but every guy I've been with has championed my efforts to get in shape. Who wouldn't want their girl to be excited and confident about looking their best? I mean, I guess I can answer that question - insecure losers.
  • It hasn't changed our relationship at all Except that I feel better about myself and I enjoy his attention more without feeling like he's faking it or something (he never was, that was my insecurity)
    He really doesn't seem to care whether I'm fat or thin, he actually just likes "me" no matter what size I am. It seems hard to believe, but I think it's really true.
  • He's feeling insecure and it's not your fault! My boyfriend appreciates my efforts to look good and get more toned because he knows he'll benefit off of them as well Just talk to your husband, figure out where his insecurities come from and reassure him that others may look, but he is your one and only.
  • I'm actually thinner/lighter than I was when I first met DH which is probably why he thinks i'm too skinny already and he preferred me a bit 'curvier'. He has said he's happy as long as I am and as long as I don't go too crazy and get sick (from being too thin, starving or exercising too much).
  • My husband is loving my new body, although he has seen it before. When we met I was about this size.

    He loves that I get attention from other men and is usually pretty confident that I won't be stolen away. But he does have his moments when he is worried, but I think that is normal. I don't think anyone should be too confident, we should never take our loves for granted.
  • My hubby keeps calling me 'new wife' lol! I told him, now he doesn't need to trade me in for two 20 year olds He's weird, he kinda likes when I get attention from other people; I think he finds it validating or something.