I agree with the "it's only one meal and traditions are traditions"...and since this is not a "we are all on a diet" crowd I say to....

stick with your basics Thanksgiving meal of Turkey and a few "normal" sides...

but invite the rest to bring a side dish of their choice....when we do big dinners/BBQ's we cook the main course and others bring side dishes...we have a list going so no one duplicates...how much macaroni salad do ya need?

That way everybody has turkey and everyone has at least one side dish they like....helps with the cost too!

Do the same with the desserts and appetizers.

I don't know about you, but Christmas isn't the reason I gained weight. It was overeating, the other 364 days of the year, that was my problem.

It's only one day. Since you are concerned, perhaps just indulge in your favorites and take smaller portions?

Don't buy or make anything so huge that there will be significant leftovers. I think that's one of the big problems with foodie festivals of whatever faith, people overcater and then it's not just one day, they're overeating for the whole week.

Make healthy snacks as well as unhealthy ones, though be prepared for people to do the unexpected and wolf down the healthy snacks before you can get to them. (Or they might sneer, in which case think of something suitable to say in advance. It can go either way, in my experience as a vegan, but most of the time people don't even notice. And the sneering was probably just some of my family who are known for being highly unpleasant people.) Raw vegetables cut into sticks with houmous or what have you, for instance.

Provide pleasant non-alcoholic drinks as well as wine. Unless your families live on the doorstep, people will be driving anyway. I can't remember which ones are good low-calorie non-alcoholic drinks, I basically live on water and herbal tea myself, but I'm sure there are lots of pleasant options. That way you can alternate wine with other drinks, and even avoid wine altogether or just have the one glass if that's what you prefer.

Do remember that while there are traditions in many countries and cultures of feeding your guests as if you were stuffing geese, it's not actually necessary in order to be a good host, and no one really enjoys indigestion or weight gain. There's a very similar conversation to this which I spotted in the 100lb forum about the Jewish festivals. And hey, at least we're not in America where they have Thanksgiving and Christmas pretty much back to back!

As for worrying about feeding your guests low-fat foods, do you honestly think they are going to come away from your Christmas dinner feeling hungry, let alone malnourished?! (Assuming you're not talking about handing them each a head of lettuce and nothing else.) Make them a delicious meal, make it healthy while incorporating traditional elements, and I'm sure you'll be fine. If you take potatoes, for instance, there are umpteen different ways of serving potatoes and some are far, far healthier than others while still being tasty and attractive. A fruit platter can be stunning for dessert, as well as light and refreshing after the traditional heavy meal, and there are probably ways you could make it look Christmassy, for instance by how you arrange the fruit or by how you decorate it. My mother used to do them on this big black platter, and she'd buy a few exotic fruit (I remember starfruit, for instance) and arrange them artfully over the more usual stuff. That plus some mince pies could be great.

I come from an English Jewish family which also met up for Christmas, so I've experience of both traditions. The meals at my aunt's were traditional and well-cooked, but they were also heavy and left everyone feeling overfed, not to mention almost exactly the same every year. My mother started to hold her own dinners, and she also started to experiment with tradition. Whenever she did, the guests wolfed down the food and praised it generously. There was a fabulous stew that was traditional for Jewish New Year in Iran, for instance. For Passover, you're not allowed to eat wheat, so naturally everyone goes mad baking all sorts of desserts and pastries made with ground almonds and the like. One year my mother skipped all that (serious heresy, believe me) and bought some meringue nests. She put a scoop of raspberry sorbet in the middle of each nest, arranged some raspberries around the edge of each plate, and I went into the garden for sprigs of lemon balm to put on the sorbet. Quick, easy, healthy, not particularly traditional, and the guests absolutely raved over it. They'd already had plenty of traditional Passover food earlier in the meal, so it's not as if they were feeling deprived.

Thanks so so much for the advice guys all very good and Ill be following what you said, Im just going to stay away from the roast tattie, my dad makes the best and in a massive amount.I know if I have one i WILL have 15 more.

I will def do trying the 1/4 of everything rather than loads of everything and I hate brussel sprouts, I know they are one of the healthiest bit but im just not a fan!!

Im excited as its our babies first christmas too and she will be old enough to try out some food which will encourage us all to cook without salt so she can taste things.

Thanks again xxx

Apparently the brussels sprouts thing is genetic. There's a bitter compound in there, and some people have the gene to taste it (and therefore think brussels sprouts are vile) and some don't (and therefore think they taste fine). I do like them, but considering that they overcook easily and a lot of people hate them, I think they're an odd choice of vegetable to become traditional in this way. I suspect there may be a similar genetic thing with fish, because some people absolutely cannot stand to go anywhere near it, myself amongst them.

I'm glad you're feeling better equipped, and congratulations on the baby! Out of curiosity, why are you worrying about Christmas so far ahead anyway?