I know it's kinda cheating, but I usually order a side, like a baked potato and an iced tea. I have them bring out the potato as my main course. I like marinara on it (instead of butter or sour cream). Or I will use a teeny bit of butter and some steak sauce on it.

I eat a protein bar right before going in, so I'm not really super hungry.

Even in the most expensive places, a potato and drink is going to only be about $10 with tax and tip. Alot of places have a decent sized, side salad and you could do that with that too.

I would leave slightly early, taking the initiative to pay the waiter first and not become part of the assumed split group. One thing I will say, it might be easier for me, because I don't drink, so my friends already know that I'm not part of their 'go to the bar and split it' groups.

Honestly, just tell your friends your watching your alcohol right now (you don't have to talk about losing weight) and tell them you won't be part of the split check group for the next little bit. One thing to consider, is that if you are uncomfortable with the 'split' thing, there are probably several other girls that are uncomfortable with it too. In those types of things, it's almost always one or two girls that push for it because they are the ones that run the tab up.

They just need a leader to help break that up. You will be helping others to stand up for themselves too.

Thanks y'all! I do occasionally have something different like a grilled chicken breast or fish. However, living in the south is not the best for healthy food options. If you ask for a plain chicken breast or fish without a butter sauce or creamy topping, most waiters will look at you like you are nuts. Pretty much every restaurant we go to had a menu that is filled with cream sauces and calories, calories, calories. Also, since we don't really do chains, they don't have the calories listed anywhere. Since I am being so strict right now and trying to stick with 1200-1600 cals at most a day, I just find the salad is the safest bet for me. When I enter maintenance, I will definitely branch out a bit. Just those few extra hundred calories would make a huge difference in what I can have. I never get any dressing on my salads... I just like salt and pepper. I do, occasionally ask for the to leave on the nuts and cheese but not often.

As far as the whole check thing goes, that is not an often occurrence with most of my friends... just this group. With my other friends, we all handle our bill and then we pick up the birthday girls dinner. Normally, since I don't go out with this group a lot, I am fine with splitting the bill (drinks and all). However, since I have had so many other food expenses lately, spending that extra $50 or so dollars is just a lot right now. I think they would be fine if I just didn't eat and explained that I had eaten before. Since I don't do things very often with that group, I would rather not deal with broaching the subject of paying my own bill vs splitting the check with them. I think it would be easier to just not eat.

Thanks for the input!!

A lot of restaurants have more vegetable options for sides than they used to. (I do get bored to death with broccoli, even though I like it.) See if you can order a protein appetizer and a side salad, you may end up with more protein. I agree most restaurant salads are lame. And instead of beefing them up with multiple vegetables, they have 2-3 "goodies" that you don't want: fried wontons, high glycemic fruit (eg pineapple), sugar-added cranberries, cheese, fried chicken. The amount of chicken on a salad is usually miniscule. When I make my own salad, it has protein, lots of vegetables (sprouts, radishes, peppers, celery, cucumber, carrots, broccoli), mixed dark lettuces, (and sometimes cabbage or spinach), a small amount of a tasty dressing, a small amount of feta or blue cheese (strong tasting so a little goes a long way). It's hard to find a restaurant salad half as tasty or half as nutritious as what you make yourself. If you can order grilled fish with two side vegetables, you may enjoy it more than a salad.

I work at Chilis, so I end up eating a lot of restaurant fare. If you do like salads, a lot of times you can really bulk up a side salad with extras that are free.

For example, our side salad comes with romaine lettuce, cucumbers, tomatoes, onions, shredded cheese, and croutons. Which is pretty skimpy. So I double the cucumbers, tomatoes, and onions, cut out the cheese, and croutons, and finally add shredded carrots, mandarin oranges, broccoli, mushrooms, and chicken. Instead of dressing, I add salsa. The original salad is $2.49, the chicken (four ounces) is $3.00 and the sauteed mushrooms are 99 cents. It's not the classiest restaurant, or the best value. But for 6 dollars it's not bad.

As a server, my goal is to help you out as much as possible (And ideally therefore get a good tip! Hah.) So feel free to ask whatever you need. If you want a veggie heavy side salad, ask me how much it would cost, ask me what you can add. Feel free to be picky. If you want salmon, no maple sauce, no butter, just spices with steamed veggies. It's no harder to ring up than someone who wants to switch mashed potatoes with fries.

I worked at Chili's too. Does yours have that darn warm chip bin just setting there, begging you to eat them???

Of course, now I work at Panera and get all the free bakery stuff that I want.

My weakness is Chili's ranch. But now that I've seen how much straight mayo goes in, I'm pretty much scared straight.

We have a Panera right next to my Chili's, oddly enough. I have to will myself not to go in there, the bagels and cream cheese there are so tempting.

I totally appreciate your situation. However, don't let the limited life experiences of some of our fellow Southerners influence your ordering decisions. Think of it this way, you'll be expanding their horizons. It's just like getting almost any other custom work done in this region. Speak plainly, be specific, be adamant about getting what you want, send it back if it's not done right the first time. They don't have to like or agree with your choices, they just have to do their jobs decently.

I really appreciate the perspective of the server... and I have to say that I do tip well, especially when I ask for a lot of "special" stuff...

I have the same problem! I even mentioned it to one of my friends because she said she was low on money too. She didn't go with us last time but I went and(we went to TGI Fridays) I ordered the Dragonfire chicken it was 437 cals and it tasted really good.

Girl I feel your pain! My situation is a little different though. I used to eat out the first year at my job...When i added it up, plus all the Starbucks...i was spending a few thousand a year! Now, i bring my own healthy lunch to work (I let myself buy lunch on Friday)...and the girls i used to go to lunch with are annoyed with me. Sorry, but you guys make twice as much as I do! Helloooo?

I just needed to vent.

I'd just ask for your bill to be separate and if anyone gives you a look who cares- this is about you- not them- you won't ruin the party asking to split your bill from the others.

I usually ask for grilled meats and double veggies on the side- let the waiter's stare- they aren't paying your bills!

But I agree- eating out sucks at times- what is UP with the sodium content? I usually say a million times NO SALT and yet my weight shoots up 2-4 lbs anytime I eat out because of the sodium content. I joke and say they put salt in their WATER also! lol.