I planned to post but I just went blank. I have no idea what I think I was going to say.

Thanks for the congrats everybody. Now it's just a waiting game till next year when I apply to dental hygiene school.

Aunty Jam, so sorry about your dog. It's so hard to watch them go and the waiting and dread can make you sick. She is lucky to have a great mommy.

Vermont, glad you got to enjoy your day. Having breakfast cooked for you is awesome. Do you have the weekends off with your new job or does it vary like mine? I'm off tomorrow and I can't wait but I really don't know what I'm going to do with myself except have dinner with a friend tomorrow night. It was pretty cold here today so you probably are having even cooler weather. I had wanted to walk at lunch but it started raining too. I image riding the bike may be tough till it warms up again.

I'm pretty down right now. I don't know how much I can talk about, since it involves another 3FC user, but I've been hanging around online waiting to hear back from a mod, and nothing is forthcoming. Can anyone help?

Love - I can give you one of these....

And thanks for the doggy support Hope. She still plays sometimes so we figure she can't feel to badly, just losing control of the body.

Hi all.
I don't even know if any of you remember me - I've been gone so long. I feel like I'm coming back to my parents' house with my tail between my legs admitting I can't make it on my own. I miss you guys! I've been wanting to come back for so long, but have been too ashamed to admit how far I've fallen
Graduate school is so hard - I guess I must have thought if I could get my weight under conrol, the rest would fall into place - but it hasn't. So, the weight came back, oh and it brought some friends
Right now, I could use a serious dose of hugs. And as pathetic as it sounds, I'd really love to hear that you guys will take me back. Y'alls support has meant the world to me in the past, and I feel like I've let you down by not being there in return. Can I come home, please?
Love,
Amarie

hugs all around! Everyone's welcomed Keep your chin up and lets get on that horse again

amarie - of course you are welcomed back!!

mrsbrady - many to you

auntyjam - anytime you post I always look at your doggies in your avatar, I know I've mentioned losing our husky/shepherd almost 2 years ago, it is SO hard and we 'lucked out' on her passing that she just 'dropped'. I can only give you and a to your sweet doggy too.

hope - weekends are the busiest time, I am expected to work them but I can plan ahead and get there early and leave early for an afternoon event, and they do let me take off whole weekends a couple times.

Hello and to everyone else I am working 12 or 13 hr days for the next few days so I might be scarce.

Finally found my way back again... I think about posting but I haven't actually done it.. Trying to get back into a routine again..

I have been off from school for three weeks now.. I still have to go every other Thursday but now I am just waiting to get into my externship. I seriously hate being home all day long everyday.. It feels so depressing. I have been working on getting out and going for walks but the weather can't seem to make up its mind on what it wants to do.

I have my friends wedding in a month and I want to lose weight so my dress fits better than it does now. I look horrible in it. So I am starting things off as day one.. to work on everything again.. Hopefully this time.. I can keep at it...

Have a good day all

Amarie!! I am so excited to hear from you!! When I logged on and saw a message from you I actually gasped and then I started clapping!
My dog was staring at me like I was crazy. I've missed you so much and wondered if you were ok. Please do come back. Cut yourself a little slack. You picked up and moved away to go to grad school which is crazy hard to do and very stressful. I admire you for that. You must be almost finished by now? Do you have another year? After that stress is over you can worry more about your weight. You've lost it before, you'll do it again, but with a master's degree! Yay again, so glad to see you!

Purefire, glad you are hanging in there. Maybe the wedding will give you the extra motivation you need to stick to things. Being home all the time is hard, for the depression thing and the eating.

Vermont, I used to do those long days when I was in the restaurant biz, and the weekends were always the busiest. Sometimes I miss the fast cash though.

Lovebirds, sorry you are having such a hard time. Are things any better?

I did a really hard workout yesterday. I actually did a high-impact cardio with lots of jumping, which I never do. I usually stick to more low impact, partly b/c of a sore ankle and partly b/c I haven't been in good enough shape to do such a thing. I made it through about 95% of it and I'm pretty proud of that. I can see that I'm making progress.

Things are a little better. I'm out of crisis but still a bit shaky and could slide back down. Being careful. to all of you.

Good morning ladies

Hi Purefire!! good to see your name here again

congrats on the hard workout hope, those high impact cardio routines are tough.

more to Mrs. Brady if you need them

auntyjam, I am thinking of your doggie and hope things aren't too difficult with that hard situation.

and Hi to everyone else!!

have to say I am in a good (great) stretch. It is light out at 5 a.m., I am at the summer job I love, I am losing a few pounds...okay when it is gonna crash on me but I appreicate the good moments so much.

Good morning all.

I'm off today and going to try to find df a b-day present. I don't know what it will be. My only idea is to get him a remote start for his work truck. It's great in the summer b/c you can get the AC going before you get in so you aren't sweating for the first 10 minutes in the car.

Vermont, glad you are doing well now. Don't go jinxing yourself with thoughts of an inevitable crash. That's my job. I'm pretty much in the same boat. Things are going well, I'm down 30lbs, class is over, everything is going ok. I find myself wondering how long it will last.

Amarie, how are doing today? Are you taking classes this summer?

How is everybody else?

I'm off to go shopping for something...

did you find a gift for your df?

How is everyone else?

so life has been completely insane for me lately!!! I feel like all I do is run. I started P90X this last week and it is kicking my butt. I think I might be going through a bout of depression. I have been mad at my DH for 3 weeks now. It was a justified mad, but I should be over it now. Now anytime that he annoys me I snap at him. Why do we beat them up like that. On top of that I am in a cycle of not being able to sleep. I finally have the 15 month old sleeping most of the night and now I can't. What is wrong with me. Anyway sorry I was away a while, just have tons and tons to do and don't really know what to say half of the time. Talk to you all later.

Trish

AMARIE-OH HOW I MISSED YOU!!!! You remind me of me!! I have been off and on...so depressed I dont wanna talk then when I do I am so down I just go on about what I am so depressed about and cant even help anyone else so then I feel ashamed and think whats the point of going and dumping on them they are dealing with their own depressing issues to?? UGHH I hate it!

Hey to the rest of you- I so quit my wellbutrin for good because it was making me a nasty person and it wasnt fair to my kids and husband...I couldnt try an wean off it because it was making things worse...so I am about 2 weeks out and trying to survive. It is 3:30 am and I am not tired..a symptom of withdrawl...PLEASE NO LECTURES...thanks

I really want to take control of my life I am tired of it just spinning like a tornado around me...Like I dont want to be a person that has this detailed schedule and cant stray from it but I am tired of each day going by with me having nothing to account for each day. Also with schedules if things get mixed up to how I plan it I get very angry and upset....a big reason I do not keep schedules!! HAHA

Had a minor break down Like my house was messy yet I couldnt even get myself to clean it my brain was saying lets do it my body was saying screw it im not getting up! UGH....Then I have a changing room upstairs and its full of clothes to be folded or put away and it totally stresses me when I go in it. I cant get my kids to pick up AT ALL after themselves...Cant get caught up on laundry, cant get caught up on boys school work, cant be consistant in weight loss efforts...feeeling very undisciplined and inconsistant....Today I actual hated myself and angry with me that I cant just do it...if it was a job Id get up and go to it.....

SOOOOOOO hows everyone else..looks like some other people are having a hard time I think the weather has a lot to do with it too!!

I will try to do personals...I beat myself up for coming in here and dumping then leaving and not writing to everyone else..I feel like I am being rude and selfish even though I dont mean to...*sigh*

ps Hope you totally rock and are my inspiration I want to be down 30 lbs by end of july when i turn 30...who knows..if I starve myself it just might happen...lol

Oh My Goodness, so glad to see the oldies but goodies back in here! I've missed you all and I'm so sick of my own boring blabbering. I welcome your complaining and self-loathing! It makes me feel like I'm not alone.

It's df's b-day today and he is upstairs napping. I want to take him to lunch or an early dinner b/c we have pool league tonight but I'm not sure I can blast him out of the bed. Vermont, I ended up getting him a couple of harley shirts and my mom got him a gift card to the movies. We'll be putting that to good use. He's very hard to buy for b/c if he wants something he just gets it immediately.

I'm not really in the mood to nap so I just worked out, did some laundry and dishes, and baked a cake for a co-worker's b-day that I'll take to work tomorrow. I think I'll hit the shower and go pick up df's cake. I'm getting a red velvet cheesecake for Cheesecake Factory. It's way too expensive and will blow my diet out of the water but what the heck. We'll share it with the pool team tonight. Better get going before I wind down too much.