Anyone ever heard of Sweet Tomatoes? They're a fantastic place to eat out. They're a salad bar type place, but you can also order prepared or tossed salads. They have a "bakery" area with things that are low-fat and like 95% fat free. They also have meals of vegetarian pastas and soups (and some that include meat for us that aren't so vegetarian). It's a great place to meet up with friends but still stay health conscious.

Happy Belated Birthday!

Sorry to hear it wasn't a good time for you though. I do actually still enjoy going out to eat by planning well in advance and I don't deter much for what I usually order lol I am not much for cooking so I would rather eat out.

This really works for me. I have even gone so far as getting the take out box right after i get my meal, divying it up, putting half in the take out box and taking and putting in the trunk of the car and then coming back in to enjoy my normal size portion!.

And can I just say...your hubby sounds like a pain in the a@@.
We need to have a specific post for dealing with people that aren't super helpful on our plan.

Oh, I miss Sweet Tomatoes. We don't have them here.

I actually enjoy going out to eat more now than I did at my high weight, mostly because I don't feel as self-conscious. When I was a size 22 I just assumed everyone in the place was thinking, "Why is that girl eating at all? She could live off her own body fat for weeks." So now, at least, I don't feel like people are staring and judging me. (I realize that was all in my head, yes.)

I prefer making my own food... but I do enjoy eating out on occasion. But I do tend to have the best weight loss results if I stay away from the overly salty, overly fatty and overly large restaurant meals.

When I do go out, I try to always get veggies for my sides. I used to always get mac & cheese, but not so much anymore. 2 veggies! If the portions are very large, I'll take home the rest and usually my husband will eat it later. I can't bring myself to let the waiter take it as we are very cost conscious these days and waste not! When possible, my husband and I usually try to split a meal, and order an extra house salad if it comes with it. I tend to get a lot of fish and chicken that's not breaded & fried, or loaded with cheese and creamy sauces. Occasionally a small 6oz or less steak. Drink: water with lemon or unsweet iced tea -- NO SODA!

I still have moments of weakness but overall I am getting much better about eating out. It's almost to the point where I don't even think about ordering the unhealthy thing. Does Not Compute.

Michelle - I take my own take away dish so that I don't have to wait for them to bring one and then I go put the half I've put in it in the car before I start eating. So, you aren't the craziest one, lol.

I want a Sweet Tomatoes. I've never been to one and looking online they don't have them here, grrr. However, there is one with a good rating in the city that hubby and I want to move to once he is no longer government property. WooHoo!! Just one more thing to make me not be able to wait for then.

Happy Happy Birfday!

I dread going out to eat. I always check online for nutritional information before I go and yet I still feel antsy. Even though I pick out what I want to eat in advance, I always worry I will not be able to resist the bread and all the other potential landmines. Sigh.....I hope one day it will get easier!

I always get the soup when eating out, especially if it's vegetarian. Unless it's potato, it's hard to get more than 400 calories into a bowl of vegetables. If nothing is vegetarian, I get something chicken-broth based and have them hold any toppings. It's no muss, no fuss. If there's nothing I can eat-or want to eat--I get coffee..

For me, I had to get over a life time of conditioning that going out to eat was an Event and that it was important to have an amazing food experience, because otherwise it was some sort of tragically wasted opportunity. I used to get really nervous and worked up over what to order because I wanted to find something that I could eat and would really enjoy. It got much easier when I realized "screw that, I'm here for the company, not the food, it doesn't matter if I even like it". So I quit treating what to order like an Epic Decision and just started picking a soup more or less at random.

As far as your husband's eating habits--I'd let that go. It really isn't your problem, and you may wish you had the power to change him, but you don't--any more than you have the power to cure cancer or stop war. It's just not something you can do, so you need to stop feeling like you can, or that you've failed if you don't. The only thing you'll do is poison your marriage, and for no reason--it won't make him any healthier, and might make him worse. He will come to it in his own time, or not. But all you can do is be a good (silent) example and answer any questions he asks.

So next time he wants to go out to eat, say "I can't spare the calories, but I'd love to drink a cup of coffee/sip a diet soda and chat with you while you eat", and once you are there, don't look at the menu or comment on food. This feels really, really weird the first few times, but it is so empowering once it is comfortable.

happy bday!

I love going out to eat. But I guess I don't have the dinner companion problem you do. The restaurant we most go to lately is Japanese food -- so I'm in hog heaven with many healthy rolls to pick from and DH is happy with many bento box choices and a good wine selection.

Are there any restaurants around that are a "good compromise" for both of you?

The other place we like is California Pizza Kitchen because I can get some good salads and he can have pizza if he wants that.

When it is more than just our immediate family (6 year old usually shares my plate) I suggest things like Sweet Tomatoes where everyone has a good chance of getting something they like.

A.

We have nearly stopped eating out, because of the price. The one place we were going to is no longer a problem either, because I discovered how to make healthy Sushi at home.

If we do end up going out, I always blow my calorie budget. I am glad you ladies have found ways to maintain that, and I will try a few of the suggestions next time.

Update. I suggested (and he agreed) to call that meal "Valentine's Day" because we didn't celebrate it on the day of, because we took his Mom out for her birthday the night before. So now we can celebrate my birthday with a meal at a restaurant of my choosing next week--and I HOPE I can find somewhere that doesn't put 3 TBSPS (!) of oil on SPINACH. Sweet Tomatoes sounds good, I wish we had one here.

I wish I could say that yes, going out to eat is just a social experience, but I've found that, no, it isn't.

If the restaurant is good, or quite an authentic ethnic experience -- and we have a lot of those down here in & near Manhattan -- then restaurant-going is more of a cultural event, almost like attending a museum or a concert, or like out-of-the-country travel, because you're being immersed in a culture & admiring someone's artistry in the medium of food.

This is when restaurant-going becomes really, really fraught for me. I have to close off part of myself: the part that used to enjoy these sorts of forays because of my intellectual & sensory curiosity & my desire to immerse myself fully in life experiences.

If I do not participate at all, I sit there & feel like some kind of religious ascetic, foreswearing all such pleasures in the name of mortification of the body. Then, all I am allowed is to smell & look at what comes to the table. And my interactions with the others become strange.

The only saving grace is that, the better the restaurant, the easier it is to order healthily or to order off-menu, because the place may very well be serving dieting actors or models every night.

Still, there's a lot I am not participating in any more, even as I'm sitting in the middle of these amazing places enjoying the ambience & the occasional well-known face. What I hate is that it makes me feel sorry for myself, and that is not a healthy place to live in mentally.