i think that part of the fear with "the easy way out" is... what if I fail at this too? What does that say about me... when even the easy way out was too hard. i know that is one of my many concerns in considering the surgery.

especially for the OP who has watched someone with the surgery fail at it.

azhriaz - I can't speak for anyone else, but I can say that I have had moments of, "Why did I have SURGERY if I'm still not losing weight?!" I haven't really lost any notable amount of weight in, what, 4 months now? I'm bouncing between 210.5-214 pretty consistently right now, so I am still technically obese for my height. In fact, I'm at a weight where I see many people STARTING their weight loss journeys. But, for the most part, I focus on how far I've come and how much I can do now that I couldn't do when I was 300+ pounds. I also know that now, I am stronger and healthier than I was when I was 300+, so I can put forth the effort required to get more of the weight off on my own. This may not be how everyone views it, but it's how I feel.

I think we sometimes place too much of the responsibility on ourselves, which I believe comes from a lifetime of living in a society that constantly reminds fat people that they are such because they are lazy, stupid, etc. Yes, some people fail at the surgery. Perhaps they got the wrong surgery for their habits. For example, if you are a grazer by nature and only nibble on small amounts of junk food all day long instead of eating large volumes at a time, a band probably isn't going to work for you. Others fail after the surgery due to mechanical issues, such as the pouch or stoma stretching. Sometimes, people have such major metabolic issues, which are difficult to pinpoint, that even major caloric restriction is not enough to get them all the way to where they need or want to be.

And then, even if failure IS caused by overeating or "not following the rules," there's likely a deeper reason, and psychological counseling should be sought.

Point being, I think we place entirely too much negative pressure on ourselves a lot of times. Yes, some people are just plain LOOKING for an easy way out and think they don't have to do any work, and that's how they end up regaining all the weight, but I'm not sure that's the case in the majority of instances (of course, in those instances, they are likely the same people looking for something else to blame other than themselves!). All we see is failure and, thus, we feel like WE are the failure, but that's not always the case.

Maybe, as part of all the testing we go through pre- and post-op, they should include resting metabolic rate testing.

Wow! This was an eye opener! Both you and jilly make excellent points. Why DOES it matter if WLS is a "easy" way to lose weight? maybe we need to replace the word easy with effective... that seems more accurate, and less judgmental perhaps.

it IS generally effective. and frankly, one of the biggest reasons that i had the surgery was NOT to lose the weight. it was to KEEP IT OFF!!! the surgery offered me the best chance to reduce the risk of regaining it - it levels the playing field so that in general, what works for everyone else [watching my diet, exercising, so on and so forth] will work for ME

My thoughts, if anyone cares, is that you have to do the work of watching what you eat and how much no matter if you have WLS or not. WLS, from my friends who have had it, still have to watch what they eat even more so then someone just "watching what they eat." The WLS is just a back up plan...a tool and a motivating one at that. As the weight comes off quicker and you feel and look better quicker, it is good motivation to keep choosing the right things. I have been on the fence for WLS for a couple of years but I know the benefits. I think you are all brave for doing it!!! Forcing yourself to confront your eating issues....Congratulations!!