I highly advise against counting calories. Start eating for the right reasons. Most likely you got where you are for eating because you are lonely, sad, bored, angry, ect. Eat whatever you want, but pay very close attention to when you are hungry (stomach growling) and when you are full (not stuffed). If you don't eat past when you are full, you will lose weight. I guarantee it. So far, food is the most comforting thing I have found to quickly numb me from everyday struggles, but there are other things that are just as comforting. bubble baths, trashy gossip magazines, or a visit with a friend. When you find yourself eating more than you need, stop and ask yourself why you are doing this? Then, say there are other things I can do to comfort myself right now that won't make me feel guilty later. The only way to never binge again is to eat whatever you want, but to stop when you have had enough of it. I stopped dieting one day and ate cookie dough for breakfast, ice cream for lunch, and cinnamon rolls for dinner, but because I let my body tell me when to stop and I lost 21 pounds. Eventually, I began to crave other foods like broccoli, dried fruit, and protein and now can eat relatively balanced, but I still eat sweets whenever I want if I am hungry. Also, Only do exercise that you love to do while you are doing it. Losing weight can be painless if you know why you gained it in the first place and IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH WHAT YOU ATE. it has to do with the emotional issues you are currently struggling with. Rememer 97% of all people who diet gain all of the weight back within 5 years. I am in it with you.

Suz,

I agree with djay...you already are wonder woman. Reread this entire thread each day. You have been given some wonderful advice from a caring and supportive group. Be sure to forgive yourself when you fall down now and then...just stand back up and keep marching. You know what to do!

Suz,

Thank you for a wonderfully well-written and honest post. It is refreshing honestly.

You can do this. The above poster is so right. Make this time about you. It is all about you. Put nothing and I do mean nothing before your nutrition, your sleep and your exercise.

I put everyone ahead of me for a decade. You know what? It didn't work. All my time, effort and energy---and at the end of the decade I was worn out looking, feeling and acting.

You can get though this. Our HP doesn't ever put more on our plates than we can digest.

My thoughts and my prayers are w/your mom now. They are with you too.