Morning!
Work tonight, tomorrow night.
I am a hormonal wreck lately. Yesterday I felt fine but a bit tired. I could NOT get motivated at all. But eventually I did go to the gym. It's a good trick, tell yourself, even if you don't feel like going, just go and do 30 min cardio. If your heart is still not into it, give yourself permission to stop. Usually though, you get all pumped up and keep it up. But after I did 20 min on the tread, I still wasn't motivated. So I popped onto elliptical, 20 min, felt a "little" better but still no go. So I went home, I was pretty sweaty still. So you can't really beat yourself up too much. At least I did 40 min cardio.
So I had to drive all the way down to pick up my debit card yesterday. It was about an hour each way. Two hours in a car, alone with my hormones. OMG! I let myself talk myself into all kinds of crap. About being overweight, even revisiting the thing back from November when Mike cheated on me. WTH? I cried all the way home.
I remember another time, was it in March? I thought I was doing okay, went out drinking with my girlfriends and ended up crying in the bathroom of the bar over the whole damn thing then too. I guess something like that just pops back into your heart when you least expect it. Or blame it on the drinking or the hormones. I gotta get off that depo shot. I just know it. So I got home and made that fabulous rib dinner I had planned and it was WONDERFUL! So I overindulged for comfort but the kids were more worried about getting back outside to play and DH barely commented on the meal. It took me like two hours to make! So I was irritable most of the night, not to mention I did NOT feel like cleaning the damn kitchen AGAIN. Or giving the kids baths. Then I got all "affectionate" if you know what I mean, and got rebuffed because DH won't go there you-know-when. So I went back to the car and the infidelity and the weight thing and got all sad again. Oh for goodness sake.
Well that is the picture of PMS isn't it!?
Another morning another attitude. I feel pretty good right now I guess. But I am always okay with you guys! It's only the kids/hubby/co workers that get the ugly stuff, right? But seriously, I feel hopeful, and again, motivated. Ate a nice breakfast, drinking lots of water. Working tonight makes me feel like I'm in my routine.
W- 4-5 liters, working overnight
E- No formal exercise today, unless I break out WiiFit, but working 12 hr shift counts for something I'm sure.
E- breakfast in the can. Fiber one cereal, Egg beaters. Lunch will be south beach wrap and fruit. shouldn't need another snack. Supper set out pork chops, green beans, ????? salad? snack tonight, apples and cheese stick, overnight dinner, south beach salad, soup? fruit? oatmeal 5 am if I need it.
D- Just ride the hormone roller coaster out. Nothing has really changed. Not in your marriage, not in your job, not in your own head. Just your perception has changed at the moment. Just look forward. Next week you'll think yourself ridiculous for even feeling sorry for yourself this week. Just ride it out.
Shari, glad to hear some good news your way. I grew up with cocker spaniels, they are my favorite dog. I hope the truck is a good match. Sounds like you've made some new fab friends. Good for you! xoxoxo
Jeni, you will LOVE your Wii! I know I would have been the same way about your dad buying it for you. My inlaws are the same way, overly generous about gifts! Which we should be happy about! But still.
HolyT, I bought those Debbie green bags last time at the store. My produce is doing so GOOD! Thanks for the tip! Is DH away? Isn't training camp coming up soon?
Audie, yes we've noticed you haven't been here!
Doorbell sorry!~
jcatron243 , 08-05-2008 07:47 PM
mothermavis , 08-06-2008 06:25 AM
NurseMichelle , 08-06-2008 09:04 AM
girls! 
and that I give great hugs! And they always call me so I never feel like I'm bothering them. I went to my first bar/nightclub with them last night. I looked like crap, my hair was a mess and I was wearing a old tshirt and sweatpants! But they insisted I go, it was around the corner, so I went. It was okay but I didn't die which is the most important thing. 
I got a library card today and checked out the Wayside school books that I read in elementary school cause they make me smile. I saw a little truck for sale when I was getting off the bus. It's a '88 Toyota, no stereo and the owner wants $1500! No way! I'll get it if it runs good and he lowers the price to $1000 or under. I met some of the people that live in the house next door. One of them is giving me his puppy! She's a gorgeous cocker spaniel/pit bull mix named Bella. She's very energetic, I'm going to make her my exercise buddy! I also met his BF who is a mechanic, he's going to check out the truck for me and also try to get the guy to lower the price! Also, I fought with myself and decided to go ahead and buy myself two Scarface medallions and......a ENELL sports bra!!! I got it brand-new off Ebay for $34! And it fits wonderful and really does give you support! I kept checking my bra by habit, looking to see if my boobies are sliding under the band or overflowing at top but with this bra, there is none of that! 
I'm going to see if the lady has it in any other colors and get one more! I'm horrible at saving money but I realized that the $20 I have sent automatically from my check to my savings in Alabama is adding up, I called the bank and it's already over $300 saved! And there is NO way I can get it unless I go there in person! Also, I managed to save EVERY reciept since my last paycheck so now I know where my money went. I had this annoying problem of my money 'disappearing'. 
Hmmm, that's all I can think of right now! Miss you guys! 
