cbeta -- I don't know if it helps to hear this or not, but exercise has always been the hardest thing for me to work in. I AM STILL lazy and STILL have a tendency to not exercise. But you CAN overcome it if you really want to (and that's the problem you're having). For me, knowing that I am likely to talk myself out of exercise helps me come up with strategies to overcome it.

For example, on days I exercise after work, it helps that my gym bag is IN the car. And I have 2 parking lot choices, and it helps when I park the car in the lot closer to the gym! Seriously. Little things sometimes make the difference. And once I point the car to the gym (rather than home) I always make it!

I am a WAHM so I can work it into my day anytime. My Dh does his as soon as he gets home from work before he eats. My MIL does hers on her lunch.

What I'm doing now and what I'm doing when I first started out are 2 totally different things.

When I first started out I was barely walking 15 minutes at a pop, slowly at that and probably about 4 X a week. I slowly increased my length of walking and my speed and the amount of days that I exercise. I'm up to 7 now and have been for quite some time, I figure if I eat every day (I like to eat), I might as well be doing SOME sort of activity. I still don't love to exercise. But I love what it does for me. So, I don't like spending 60-90 mins at a time doing it. So that's why I break it down to several parts. This is what works for me. I don't remember at what point I added in a 2nd walk, but to me it made perfect sense. If I couldn't do it for longer, I could do it more often. Burn more calories. Now, even though I could go longer, I still choose to break it up. I now add in intervals of jogging.

My at home workout (non-walking outdoors) consists of mainly dancing and strength training. Sit ups, stretching, resistance band and that kind of stuff. The past couple of day though I just changed it up a bit and have been doing Leslie Sansone's Walk Away the Pounds 3 mile walk DVD adjusting it a bit to fit my needs. Those are great, great beginner tapes by the way. Her one mile walk is quick and easy to follow.

In the beginning just get used to getting yourself moving. You have plenty of time to increase. Activity and movement is what you are looking for right now. Just do a little bit more then the day before. If you're watching TV, get off that couch at every commercial. STraighten up the living room, wash some dishes - just move. That's what I did. I used all those "little tricks" to get myself moving. Taking stairs instead of the elevator. Parking further away from your destination then need be. I always have it on my head to burn extra calories. It doesn't have to be anything fancy. And it works.

It's a process. You don't need to get from A - Z in one full swoop. Ease into it. Good luck to you. You CAN do this. And you've got the full support of everyone here to guide you through in whatever you need.

EDITED TO ADD: I just read that you don't have a TV. That might take away the getting off the couch at every commercial portion of my post. But as far as exerise DVD's go, you can view them on your computer.

robin, thansk for the hug. I think you hid the nail on the head... "tricking myself". It might be that this is the harders thing to overcome. I struggle inside myself (as I learn how others did it).
I wil try to explain: There is a path to my goal, and to even out the road, and perhaps make it faster, I can "help" myself along with the tricks. This is a step forward on that path towards my goal. But inside, I constantly analyze that I am living a lie, lieing to myself and others about what I want and do not want to do...[it is super hard, I am crying as I was reading everyone's comments and as I am typing now] I cannot seem to make piece with it.
In my past attempts, I think I disabled that process, acting like Scarlett from Gone with the Wind - "I will think about it tomorrow", but later is no better - I have to come to terms with it and I just don't know how.
It is childish to look for reasons why "I am so different than others", and therefore I want to change inside myself somehow...I know something will click and then I will be ok.
Thank you very much for your comments.
I am actually ok on walking: in the evening at the gym, I can still do my 45 minutes of eliptical yes with some sweat, but w/o being super ehausted. I can do 100 crunches, on a that thing which curls my arms. My old trainer said that physically I have good muscell mass, and that is because I used to dance semi-professionally about 15 years back. I do go camping, and can walk up some hills, slowly but can...my friends have been very supportive several times as I tried it, all is great except for my left knee which is not very stable.
I've seen those walk away the pounds cds. I stopped crying as I typed and now started again...sorry I am just a mess today. I think I will go and do some excercise (I thought of skipping it, but talking with everyone and not doing anything made me guilty)
[Sorry for writing so much, I might sound like I am crazy, but today has been one crazy day and as soon as I excecise I am ready for it for be over]

See my post 30 min ago, as I promissed I did 30 minutes of Gilad excercise dvd :-) first 15 came from his abs workout and rest were from his aerobics. I feel better because I did them, but somehow still not enough :-(

Please don't feel bad CBETA. It is an absolute struggle for me to make myself exercise! When I first started losing weight, I was at the gym, 4 times a week doing cardio...Then summer hit, I was out of school, no schedule...And I stopped doing it completely. ONly in the last 2 weeks have I convinced myself I need to do this..For me exercising is like visiting the gyno rhino...I don't want to do it, and I DREAD the day I have my appointment...but I know I HAVE TO and once it's over, I realize it really wasn't so bad as I hyped it up to be. And with exercise, after I get back into the routine a few days and stop being sore, I actually ENJOY the way my body feels after a work out...I feel lighter and healthier! So just give it a few days, try to get into a routine that works for you, and you might just like it

smokeymonkey and everyone else thank you so much for encouraging words.
I know it will be esier it just takes time...
I am feeling better after the excercise and after some unplanned reward:
Back in May I went on a last minute trip to see a friend from my native city who I've not seen for 14 years. She traveled to France with a group of guys from my native city mostly. Everyone including her (except for me) were lawers. Mainly men, i.e. a team of 25 or so lawers who play soccer in the Lawers Soccer League. (EuroLawers tornament, which took place in St Maxime - south of France). I really enjoyed my time there and made lots of friends. After doing the dvd, I saw a paper with their numbers, and decided to call a couple of them. We were so excited to reconnect and talk again, one of them even stepped out of the court when he saw an out of the country number.
I am planning to go with them on thier next your tournament which will take place in Spain. I do want to lose the weight. A little wish I've had for years, of a man carrying me, might come true more than once.
I do know they wish me well, and really some of them stood up for me there more than once. I want to suprise them and look slimmer just like all girls in my native country...no wonder they bring brides from there. Girls are really toned and I want to be better than I am now. (may be shallow but true)
Again thanks for the support I do feel a bit better, off to bed - tomorrow is another day and another stuggle for me.

I am a single parent that works 40 hours a week away from home. My work hours are 8am to 5pm. I have tried getting up in the morning to exercise, and once I got out of bed, the workout was fun and I was energized all day long. The getting out of bed is the hardest part. Morning exercise also means going to bed earlier and I resist this because I will be giving up my "Me Time".
Currently, I exercise about 7:30 -8:00pm. I get home, make dinner, clean up the kitchen and begin my exercises. My ideal night starts with a 30 minutes walk around the neighborhood. When I get home, I am dressed for a workout and am warmed up. My ideal night doesn't happen often. lol Last night I exercised right after work. Then the kids helped me make dinner. That worked very well.
I am gearing myself up to begin a morning exercise routine. It's so hot here right now (100 degrees today with a high humidity) that an evening walk is impossible. But a morning one is doable. I am checking out the C25K program because I feel a 20 to 30 minute run in the morning will give me a better workout than a walk. And the time frame is easier to work in because it's shorter too. But it means leaving my kids at home alone in the mornings too.
To be consistent with exercise, you have to make it a priority. I know I feel better and lose weight faster when I exercise. I know it makes me healthier and my heart happier. Exercise makes my body more toned and more attractive. You can to it too!

Thank you guys for all the great advice.
I've rested the entire weekend, and did not do any serious exercising primarily because of TOM, but this morning was my first.
I did get up and went to the gym spent 45 min on an eliptical, and did 60 crunches.
Now I am about to have breakfast and head to the office. I am actually already have been working for about half an hour, as our application went down and got called on my way back from the gym.

I am proud to announce that for the first time in my life, I've become a "morning exerciser". I am normally a night person, but for over a month I've gotten up M-F to work out at 6am at the gym. It works for me because I've had morning insomnia (waking up too early, unable to fall back asleep) for a while, and I decided I'd rather get out of bed and experience the "discomfort" of a gym than to deal with ongoing frustration about insomnia. Tossing and turning trying to sleep was a waste of time, and I took it as my body telling me something.

It also helps me that I have a workout buddy who meets me every morning at the gym. I like having a social activity, some "me time", before having to go in to work.

Getting ready at the gym: yeah, it's kind of inconvenient, but there are tricks and benefits to it. The benefit of showering at the gym every day is that my own bathroom stays clean! I tend to wear wrinkle-free clothes to work that I *know* work together (I often try things on the night before). I bought sample/travel sizes of my favorite products, and when I ran out of them I refilled the bottles with my at-home stash, so I always have small bottles of hygiene products in the gym bag. I pack my bag at night - trying to pack a gym bag at 5:00am for me is pathetic.

At this time, I keep my workout routine simple. I did treadmill for the first few weeks, then eventually added in ellipticals, stationary bikes, and the row machine. On weekends, I add in "recreational" exercise like hiking, or taking my DS swimming. DS also enjoys the gym, so sometimes I do an extended session on the elliptical on the weekends. I also occasionally go to an evening cardio class, walk, or roller blade with a friend in the evenings as well.

I like having all of my exercise requirements done for the day, so when I go home I can be as lazy as I want to.