Michele - can't wait to hear how your Tough Mudder went/is going! Hope the head fog cleared in time!

saef, I think anybody who went through your past year deserves recognition, not judgmental tones. You're still 100 pounds down - a mind-boggling achievement that never left your mind or habits despite what life threw at you. Good grief. In my nasty moments, one of which is right now, I would love for your doctor to walk in the shoes you wore this year, and to try to recover from it.

allison, looser is a great sign. For me, that always precedes a scale drop.

bargoo, thanks for reminding us about the serenity prayer/mantra. Perfect timing - I could use a big ole dose of wisdom right now myself. Yay on the good week!

dagmar, I'd send you a big box of serenity if I knew how to pack it. Instead, should I just imagine a peaceful, swift passing for your dad?

TOM jumped me without warning yesterday, 4 days ahead of expectations. The silver lining was the 146.5 this morning, a number that needs to be a more frequent visitor for the next few weeks.

Becky, thanks for your kind words, which are only the truth, only I can't always see it clearly myself.

And you, woman: Be strong while you are alone in the house. Do not eat just because you're there with the food and no witnesses. And I will try to do the same myself, as I am on edge this weekend. Nothing really big. It's just the usual anxiety of having set myself a lot of small errands and tasks for the weekend, and worrying about getting them done. Sometimes the accumulated effect of all these gnat-like things flying around my face is enough to set me off.

Michele, I hope you are feeling better today , at least at the start of the Tough Mudder. Good luck !
Becky, congrats on the 146.5 today, good going !
Allison I know the feeling of looser shorts. Don't you love it ?
saef, I agree with Becky , you have gone through a year that would do in a lesser woman. You have shown great courage and determination much more than I would be able to summon up given the same circumstances.

Kind of proud of my week's calorie total: 10,339.3. My weight is below 150 (but just barely). Got out golfing today (for the last time for a while--they're about to "change" the grass on the course).

I haven't posted in a couple of days, mainly because I've been so exhausted. I've kept up in reading everyone's posts, though, and have felt guilty for not encouraging everyone. I absolutely love what an encouraging forum this is. There may be weeks that I have something to offer, and will post regularly. Other times, please know I'm reading and cheering everyone on, but can't post. A little background on me might help...

I have had a few life changes this year, and I think my need for encouragement, and then solitude, are warring with each other. I should probably mention that I was in a car accident this past year, and am still struggling with depression and ptsd...riding in a car makes me feel very vulnerable. Or terrified, frozen, panicked, those explain it a bit better. So, two weeks ago I finally had to switch jobs, leaving a sweet girl with Down Syndrome I have worked with for six years. Deep sadness! The reason? I couldn't handle the long commute each way. I am happy with the new job I was blessed with...less days, less commute, but grieving the loss of what was my life.

I am healing from the accident, but have neck and back problems still. The depression makes it hard for me to want to exercise, but I know exercise definately helps. I'm doing well eating right, I just need to find the energy to put my shoes on and START exercising. I'm tired just thinking about it. Although I'm in pain, I'm excited that I'm maintaining, and slowly losing, the weight. The more I lose, the less my aching body has to carry around, and the better I feel about myself.

I'm sorry for rambling. I just wanted to explain that some weeks I may be an encouragement, while other times I'll just pray for you all and cheer you on silently.

4keeps Congratulations for having the determination to lose weight, even in a year that sounds like it has had its share of trauma and sadness.

Just curious - do you see a chiropractor and/or do physio? I had a neck injury from a car accident and resisted treatment for 4 years - just bore the pain and thought it was "part of life". Then I finally, at DH's considerable and constant urging, went to physio. After 6 appointments and doing at home exercises targeting my problem it went away!

When I suffered a back spasm at the beginning of the summer I tried a chiropractor - didn't bother waiting 4 years this time . That helped immensely and I am now almost pain free.

Dagmar

4keeps, we welcome all comments whether they are encouraging to others or when you need encouragement. I understand about the trauma after a car accident, it can leave a lasting fear. It looks like you have made some positive steps to help in that area.

4keeps, I understand about trauma and lasting memories, and this I can tell you: Turning to lifting weights three times a week has really helped me, more psychologically even than physically. Making myself stronger, feeling in command of something, and feeling a little less vulnerable has been good for me. (Now if I could just deal with the heavier weight on the scale without feeling badly ...) I am not saying you should be doing anything you aren't physically capable of doing yet, but maybe the key to take away is: Do things that make you feel strong and competent. Whatever they may be. Part of my trauma is feeling not only loss, but also feeling small and helpless, overtaken by large events quite outside my control. When I feel more in control, I feel just plain better.

Everyone has to find their way through little baby steps, though.

Know that I will think of you and hope for small, good things for you each day, so you can get back to where you were before It Happened.

This morning my scale tells me I am a half a pound over my ticker figure. Glad of that of course, it has taken since the first of the year to get to this point. I do want to lose that last half of a pound , ego, you know. That is as low as I want to go, if I could go lower I suspect it would be really hard to maintain.
In addition to being able to button some pants that have been bugging me for awhile, I can button the jacket of my Calvin Klein suit, didn't try the pants but I think they should be OK. This has been a very good day.

Congrats bargoo!

Dagmar

bargoo! Woohoo! There's something about getting that key piece of clothing back into the front of the closet, isn't there?

4keeps, our community's well of support runs pretty deep. When you need, take - and when you can give, add. It's all good!

allison, that's a low calorie total, wow! You're all set up for a big whoosh, it looks like!

I found a really good leek potato soup recipe. Probably not classic diet food, but very satisfying even in smaller amounts. Well, the butter and cream were organic, the chicken stock was homemade, and the leeks, potato, onions, and thyme all came out of the garden. We unanimously agreed that a little bit of crumbled bacon for garnish would have taken it to the heights.

I flipped back through my calendar, and I am kicking off the week in a good spot. This is my lowest Monday weigh-in of 2012: 147. A "blipless" weekend! While it's a significant milestone, I have not forgotten that I do have to shoehorn in some time for swimming, for sanity's sake as well as health improvement. This IS the week. I mean it - even if it's only one trip, I am in the pool this week.

Becky, maybe September is a good month for dieters. it has taken all of 2012 to get to this point a total loss of 18.8 pounds , it goes sooooo slow. I think the main thing is persistance , do not give up , even though is seems like we are getting nowhere.
Closet shopping is great......I loved getting into my old shorts that I bought at Target just as much as my getting into my Calvin Klein suit.
Your soup sounds delish , Becky. I have been thinking soup lately, too. I have some ham hocks in my freezer, Navy Bean Soup here we come !!

Becky, from my own experience, I may know what's going on with you. You are holding yourself to a certain standard before you have even let yourself get wet. Don't. Having great expectations can be paralyzing. Go easier on yourself. Just get in that pool and splash around. Or at least, tell yourself that's all you need to do.

I'm thinking of a certain highly productive writer whose habit of writing a certain number of words daily, no matter what, impressed a lot of people. When he was asked what his secret was, he said: "It's simple. I lower my standards."

That would be my answer for anyone who thinks they can't maintain an exercise routine. Lower your standards. Maybe to the point where all you expect of yourself is getting suited up, into the sports bra and capris, or in your case, Becky, the swimsuit. Turn off your brain. And walk toward the gym or pool. Just let it happen. Be in the right place, in the right clothes. With absolutely zero expectations. And you will get it done.

And yes, I am wondering how Michele is doing, and whether she was able to go through with the Tough Mudder, since she wasn't well late last week. Or if she's lying somewhere in traction, with a bone broken or all her muscles aching. Or she's in a jubilant high and not able to sit down and find words to explain it yet.

I googled the Tahoe Tough Mudder, I went immediately and took a nap, just from reading about it . It isn't just Tough , it is TOUGH and it is for a good cause. I applaud Michelle for doing it. I hope she is able to stand upright today and is not crying in pain.