[marny]

Wow! For 54 days I have not eaten between meals, have not eaten my binge trigger foods, have not binged, and have been free from my obsession with food!!

Most days have been smooth sailing. But, there are days that I really have to use all of my OA tools. Easter was rough. I was pissed that there was so much binge food around. I was angry that I couldn't eat some of it like a normal eater. But I prayed, I read my OA books, I called my sponsor, and I recommitted my abstinence to myself and God whenever I started to think about food that isn't part of my program. I made it through, and felt even stronger.

I thank God for the OA program, the people in it, and the tools and steps. I have my life back.

[happydaisy]

Good job!!

[MtaTJac]

Marny,
You truly are an inspiration! And proof that dedication and giving control over to the higher power is definately the best step you can take in recovery.

[ellis]

Holy petolies, Marny, you are amazing, girl!!

[marny]

Thanks guys! My yoga poses are getting stronger. My jeans aren't tight anymore. I'm actually enjoying the feeling of hunger--real hunger which I hadn't felt in years. I'm enjoying it because it means that I haven't eaten since my last meal. It means that I'm not poisoning my body with binge crap. It's definitely a different feeling than what I used to claim was hunger. That wasn't hunger! Hunger comes when I haven't had a meal in 4-5 hours. And it's okay to feel it, because it's time to eat.

[MtaTJac]

Marny, my biggest goal is to know what hunger feels like! I have no clue what it feels like, and so that is my biggest want. Because the way I am now, I binge and binge.

Of course these past few days, I'm trying not too... I'm trying hard not to! But sometimes it's just unavoidable.

[marny]

I love the new picture avatar! You are a cutie. :-)

As you give yourself over to the steps, it will become easier to not binge. I know it's hard to believe, but you can see living proof at your meeting. :-)

Reading the OA literature really helps open your eyes to so many things. I read it everyday. I'm currently working on my 4th step. Well, working up to working on my 4th step. It scares me. Logically, in my mind I know that just like the first 3 steps it will be freeing, loving, and healing. But, emotionally I just don't wanna do it. So, I'm working on that. I'm reading step 4, writing on it, and now I need to pray about it. :-)

[MtaTJac]

Marny, Thank you Everytime I look at that picture I'm disgusted by my double chin and the roundness of my face! (I thought it would make a good avatar because it reminds me how much I don't want to look like that

I picked up "The Twelve Steps of Overeaters Anonymous" today at the library! So I'm going to read through that tonight if I feel the need to binge. I know it's a long road that I'm starting down, but people like you make it seem easier

[marny]

Alright! You got the book, and a plan. You rock!

[MtaTJac]

You are making my night!

I am just motivated at the moment Nothing too exciting either direction.