3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community

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-   -   Meetings! (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/overeaters-anonymous/280790-meetings.html)

magdaloo 05-01-2013 12:16 PM

Meetings!
 
hiya!

i wanted to check in and see if there's anyone else here who is a regular OA meeting attendee, or maybe is new to meetings (like me).

I live in the Los Angeles area and was listening to the OA Light a Candle meeting podcast for quite a few months. I've known I'm a compulsive overeater for approximately forever, and a lot of the stories really rang true to me. I'm an isolator, though, and so I put off going to meetings. I could always find an excuse not to go to one, though living in Los Angeles there are meetings at all days and times. I guess I wasn't yet ready.

These last couple of weeks I've attended about six meetings. I am still feeling very new. I haven't found a sponsor or decided on a food plan. I'm hoping that happens within the next couple of weeks.

Going to meetings has already been immensely valuable to me. I can tell it's going to make a huge difference.

Anyone else here who is a regular meeting-goer? How did you find your sponsor? What do you think of the program?

dreamy2007 05-02-2013 02:44 AM

hello!

I started attending OA in mid-Feb and I really like it so far! I started with attending about 2-3 meeting a week and now I go to a Saturday morning meeting regularly. I am in another 12 step program so I'm kind of familiar with the format and the steps. Fortunately for me, my sponsor is in the other 12 step program I'm in and she's also in OA! So I already had a sponsor when I came into OA.

I've had my sponsor for about 2 years in another program and have heard her talk about OA from time to time. I never really was that interested until I started "eating clean" and stopped eating sugar. By day 3, I KNEW I NEEDED HELP!!! I could not cut sugar out cold turkey from my life without OA!!! It's been 71 days of no sugar and flour and it would NOT have been possible without OA! I have been on every diet in the book and this DOES NOT FEEL LIKE A DIET. For now, I'm eating 3 meals and 2 optional snacks (between breakfast & lunch and lunch & dinner) and abstaining from all the foods that I remember binging on. I might slowly add some food back in but for now I'm abstaining from sugar, flour, rice, pasta, white potatoes, popcorn and chips. I know it might sound drastic and I've never done anything like this before in my life and I've struggled with my weight, food and self-image as a little kid but somehow OA is working for me. I don't know how but I call my sponsor everyday (or attempt to, some days I oversleep and miss it) and somehow the days just keep passing. I have not even had artificial sugar until today, afraid the sensation of sweetness might trigger my urge to overeat.

I don't know how I'm doing it but I'm working the steps and attempting to call my sponsor everyday and going to at least 1 OA meeting a week and I go to another 12 step meeting once a week too. I don't know if this is my definite food plan forever but for now, it's working for me and I'm taking it one day at a time. I've tried attending different meetings at different location to get a feel for different meetings but I really like my Saturday morning group so I usually attend that one.

It has already been quite a journey. I'm reading the steps, writing and working the steps. It's so weird that I'm doing all these things that's not about the food but it's helping me with the food. My head seems clearer, I'm less anxious, I'm feeling my emotions quicker, more in touch with my emotions and I'm not overeating. I almost don't know who I am sometimes. After the first 30 days, my husband was kind of unsure what's happening too. He said you seem different, not sure how but different. Weird and different but I think I like it.

dreamy2007 05-02-2013 02:52 AM

For those who are not familiar with OA, OA does not dictate what you can or cannot eat. If you find yourself at a meeting that is telling you what to eat, then you are not at an OA meeting. There are many meetings that have come from OA that have a strict food place but OA lets you define your own abstinence. That works best for me though of course that's different for everyone. I really like defining my own food plan and knowing that I don't have to stick with the same food plan forever, it's about one day at a time. Also, I don't measure or weigh my food though some ppl in OA do and it works for them, I just abstain from the foods I used to binge on. For now, that works for me :)

blog 05-20-2013 10:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dreamy2007 (Post 4727227)
For those who are not familiar with OA, OA does not dictate what you can or cannot eat. If you find yourself at a meeting that is telling you what to eat, then you are not at an OA meeting. There are many meetings that have come from OA that have a strict food place but OA lets you define your own abstinence. That works best for me though of course that's different for everyone. I really like defining my own food plan and knowing that I don't have to stick with the same food plan forever, it's about one day at a time. Also, I don't measure or weigh my food though some ppl in OA do and it works for them, I just abstain from the foods I used to binge on. For now, that works for me :)

OA HOW and 90 day programs will tell you what to eat and what not to eat. General meetings follow the principles that you just laid out. I much prefer the general meetings. I personally don't find recovery in other people telling me what to eat. I find recovery in listening to my body tell me what it needs, with the help of a higher power. To each their own. I'm glad there is a place people can go when they want to discuss strict eating plans, because I don't want to be around that myself.

blog 05-20-2013 10:42 PM

BTW, it took me three months to find the right sponsor. Don't feel rushed. Do things in your own time.

It was my experience that, when I'm really in my eating disorder, I want to do everything right away. I can't tolerate waiting or patience. Just the act of letting myself take the time to ease into the program was huge for me. This isn't one of those things that you do for a week and then burn out and give up. I know, one day at a time, right? But also, there is understanding that if you spend that one day acting like its your last day, your not going to find a lot of recovery.

dreamy2007 05-26-2013 09:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blog (Post 4747667)
OA HOW and 90 day programs will tell you what to eat and what not to eat. General meetings follow the principles that you just laid out. I much prefer the general meetings. I personally don't find recovery in other people telling me what to eat. I find recovery in listening to my body tell me what it needs, with the help of a higher power. To each their own. I'm glad there is a place people can go when they want to discuss strict eating plans, because I don't want to be around that myself.

Agreed. OA HOW, CEA-HOW, 90 Day OA...sound like OA (and I believe came from OA) but I don't think they have the same Intergroup as OA now which means the literature is different. Just like blog, I'm glad OA (without an "official food plan") works for me too but because there are so many different kinds of groups addressing food/body image issues, if one group doesn't work for you, don't give up and keep coming back! I'm in 2 different 12 step programs, one being OA and it's been LIFE CHANGING for me!

blog 05-29-2013 09:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dreamy2007 (Post 4753427)
Agreed. OA HOW, CEA-HOW, 90 Day OA...sound like OA (and I believe came from OA) but I don't think they have the same Intergroup as OA now which means the literature is different. Just like blog, I'm glad OA (without an "official food plan") works for me too but because there are so many different kinds of groups addressing food/body image issues, if one group doesn't work for you, don't give up and keep coming back! I'm in 2 different 12 step programs, one being OA and it's been LIFE CHANGING for me!

I think it depends on the area. In my area, the regular OA and the OA HOW share intergroups. CEA - HOW is a totally separate organization. They left OA in protest after the "gray sheet" was found to be nutritionally unfit for many people and in violation of the tradition where no outside influences are allowed. You will find people in your regular meetings who adhere to HOW, so I think its important for newcomers to know that these things exist and that they are not the majority of OA members, so that they can make an informed choice about what they do and do not want to be part of.

A lot of HOWers also don't recognize that many OA members do not follow their restrictive diets and that we are just as legit as they are. One of the tell phrases is "weigh and measure." They like to talk about this a lot, as they find it a primary tool for recovery. I was really freaked out by that until someone explained it to me.

Once, I was surrounded by three women who were dead set that the "cure" for my discomfort around Thanksgiving with my family was "WEIGH AND MEASURE!!!" One of them was trying to convince me that I should bring a scale to the dinner table. None of them listened enough to know that the real problem was with an Uncle who was sexually harassing me.

That thought brings me to another thing - people who are solid in their recovery don't go around trying to "make" other people see the light. They don't have their self-esteem wrapped up in wether or not you have recovered "correctly." So, when someone approaches you and tries to convince you that their way is the right way, that's just a good way to know that they are still hurting, and still very much in the disease.

People who are solid in recovery will be much more interested in listening and sharing their story. It won't feel like you are being manipulated or forced when you talk to them.

Aztec1 06-15-2013 04:16 PM

Can someone help me to find the closest OA meeting I live in the city of Pico Rivera

Aztec1 06-15-2013 04:18 PM

Im not sure wich one of the OA meetings is closest to me ...I live in the city of PIco Rivera can someone point me to the right direction

dreamy2007 06-20-2013 01:21 AM

I'm assuming CA? There's one in Downey on Monday at 6:30pm. 1st Baptist Church of Downey, 8348 3rd St, Rm 115, Downey, CA 90241. Also Friday at 7:30pm in Whittier. St Matthias Episcopal Church, 7056 Washington Ave, Whittier, CA 90602. Check OA . ORG for more meeting. You can punch in the zip code and search.

I Transform Me 08-03-2013 03:06 PM

I just tried the phone meeting for the first time. It was very helpful especially with kids and crazy schedules.


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