[thewalrus0]

I'm been overweight for as long as I can remember, except in highschool when I lost 60 pounds by dieting obsessively. I had no idea I was losing in an unhealthy way and I eventually gained it back plus a bunch more!

I have had some success counting calories or doing WW, but I always fail within a month or two because of my overeating and binging. Sometimes I can't stop myself from binging for even one day. For instance, yesterday was my first day back on WW and I binged on pizza in the evening and today I tried to 'restart' and ate 21 of my weekly points! I know that doesn't mean 'fail' but if I can't even go one day without overeating what the heck am I going to do?

I feel horribly out of control. Everytime I think about food I just want to cry and I fear that I'm just going to get bigger and bigger. I am 21 and in college and I just want to be living my life. I want to make some progress with this weight loss and start getting healthier. I know exactly how to lose weight the healthy way but I just can't stop myself from overeating or binging.

I am going to go to an OA meeting on Thursday but I just worry that it will be just the same everyday, except with me telling people how upset I am about it each week. I feel like I don't know how to stop overeating.

I think I'm just letting it all out here, and I'm not really sure if I even have a question. Maybe I just need some support. I need to hear that others have gotten through this and that there might be some hope for me to lose weight and live a normal life.

[coffeeshopgirl]

Hi thewalrus0!

I feel the same way - in fact, I just wrote a post in the Depression and Weight Loss thread very similar to yours.

What to do about it? Heck if I know. I feel like the weather and post holidays have been harder this year than anticipated. But, I've been coming to 3FC and reading/listening to other people's struggles and successes until my moods breaks.

Maybe writing these posts is the first start? I'm sure hoping so.

Anyway, I hope posting about it has been a little helpful. One step at a time, right?

Sending positive thoughts your way!

[nationalparker]

Just a few thoughts - using "walrus" as your name here sounds like a very negative thought to use every single time you check in here - Unless it's a very favorite mammal, you're enchanted with them, love them - then that's different But be sure you surround yourself with positivity. I would hate to have my name here be WhaleOutOfWater or something like that - I want to check in with something I love - does that sound silly?

Give yourself credit for what you're doing well for yourself - you have joined WW. Big step!

The fact that you slipped a bit last night - you can pick yourself and dust yourself off and get back with it ... As I've heard before - if you drop a dish and break it when washing dishes, you don't open the cupboard and throw out all of the rest of them. If you stumble when getting out of bed, you don't lay on the floor until tomorrow.

Add extra veggies to every meal that you can. Granted, veggies at breakfast are a struggle, but if you make eggs, add onions and peppers... The nutrients they provide is a bonus to the fill they add to meals.

You can do this. Be positive. Give yourself credit for what you do well. WHY do you want to lose weight and get healthier? Write that down and refer to it frequently. Keep it in the forefront of your mind. Maybe the goal isn't to stay on track for 30 days, but for the next few hours. Then you build small successes every single day!! And you build up your ability to resist overeating. You so can do this!

[thewalrus0]

Thank you both for the kind responses.

I actually use the username Walrus because of the poem The Walrus and the Carpenter from Through the Looking Glass. I feel TheWalrusandtheCarpenter would be too long for me. Anyways, it's one of my favorite poems in one of my favorite books. It could've easily been The_Jabberwocky0 or something like that. I definitely don't hate any walrus. I think they are cute.

Anyways, I am often very positive. You must understand that I have many times attempted, healthily and positively, to lose weight. This post was sort of like a last straw cry for help I suppose. I've counted calories, and not too low mind you, I often eat veggies...I drink all my water and sometimes I exercise just because I like to exercise.

I think I was just feeling particularly bad about my eating habits today and I needed to shout it out to some people who know what it's like.

I believe joining something like OA will give me a place to be reminded that I'm not alone and that some people can recover from binge eating and over eating.

Also, I joined WWOnline, not the one with meetings because the meetings are expensive! I also feel I have a very specific issue with food. It's not my inability to eat veggies or cook a healthy meal and it's not my inability to portion out foods correctly or an inability to exercise...it comes down to this moment where I feel like I literally can't stop myself from overeating or binging.

It's hard to explain, I suppose. I think I was pretty spot on when I said I feel like a rubber band being stretched to the point of breaking. I feel like every morning I'm resolved and I do well until a certain point in the afternoon/evening where I start to feel like I want to just eat whatever when I get home...and it grows and grows until I break and overeat. Then it repeats like that most evenings...

[Liz46]

I still have times when I overeat, especially on weekends, which I just posted about in another thread. That's something I've got to work on in myself, too. But I wanted to ask if you've ever heard of "Intuitive Eating"? With IE, you eat the things you love from hunger to satisfied. Even though I still have times (weekends mainly) when I want to eat compulsively, it has helped me tremendously with not going far too overboard most times. There is a thread on IE underneath General Diet Plans and Questions if you're interested in it.

Wishing you well on your journey.

[blog]

Originally Posted by Liz46

I still have times when I overeat, especially on weekends, which I just posted about in another thread. That's something I've got to work on in myself, too. But I wanted to ask if you've ever heard of "Intuitive Eating"? With IE, you eat the things you love from hunger to satisfied. Even though I still have times (weekends mainly) when I want to eat compulsively, it has helped me tremendously with not going far too overboard most times. There is a thread on IE underneath General Diet Plans and Questions if you're interested in it.

Wishing you well on your journey.

Intuitive Eating and OA are completely compatible. I arrested my eating disorder for three years with the methods that Genine Roth spelled out in her dozen or so self-help books. Its really good stuff.

My eating disorder is a progressive disease. That means it gets worse as time goes on no matter how long I've been treating my body well. I had a ruff year and my binge eating symptoms started coming back. I went to OA and it has really helped. OA has been wonderful for me. I had no idea that I would be able to find support in getting back to a more gentle, self-loving way of eating. OA is a grassroots organization. That means that there are all sorts of people with all sorts of ideas about what "heathy eating" means. That doesn't matter. What does matter is that OA members come together to support each other in recovering from their eating disorders. We do use the 12 steps, which are really more about how to live so that your emotions don't drive you straight to the nearest donut shop. If you want structure and the whole "weight and measure!!!" thing, you can find that, too. Look for OAHOW to be sure you'll find this type of group. But you don't have to be that way.

[blog]

Originally Posted by thewalrus0

Thank you both for the kind responses.

I actually use the username Walrus because of the poem The Walrus and the Carpenter from Through the Looking Glass. I feel TheWalrusandtheCarpenter would be too long for me. Anyways, it's one of my favorite poems in one of my favorite books. It could've easily been The_Jabberwocky0 or something like that. I definitely don't hate any walrus. I think they are cute.

Anyways, I am often very positive. You must understand that I have many times attempted, healthily and positively, to lose weight. This post was sort of like a last straw cry for help I suppose. I've counted calories, and not too low mind you, I often eat veggies...I drink all my water and sometimes I exercise just because I like to exercise.

I think I was just feeling particularly bad about my eating habits today and I needed to shout it out to some people who know what it's like.

I believe joining something like OA will give me a place to be reminded that I'm not alone and that some people can recover from binge eating and over eating.

Also, I joined WWOnline, not the one with meetings because the meetings are expensive! I also feel I have a very specific issue with food. It's not my inability to eat veggies or cook a healthy meal and it's not my inability to portion out foods correctly or an inability to exercise...it comes down to this moment where I feel like I literally can't stop myself from overeating or binging.

It's hard to explain, I suppose. I think I was pretty spot on when I said I feel like a rubber band being stretched to the point of breaking. I feel like every morning I'm resolved and I do well until a certain point in the afternoon/evening where I start to feel like I want to just eat whatever when I get home...and it grows and grows until I break and overeat. Then it repeats like that most evenings...

There are a good number of members who use WW as their food plan. I'm not one of them, but you aren't alone. I feel weird about paying other people to hold me accountable. OA really appeals because its free, except for a donation of a buck or two. I feel more heartfelt when money isn't involved.

The important thing is to find a meeting where you feel comfortable and just let yourself go to the meeting and absorb what people are saying. You'll probably discover that you aren't the only one who feels like a rubber band being stretched to the point of breaking. When I first went to OA, my life was a WRECK. Eating was what I was doing instead of helping myself heal from that. I was also very lonely, having lost my close friends and having no romantic relationships. Just having friendly faces to visit made a huge difference. I've been binge-free now for 5 months! Before OA, I couldn't go one day without sugar and I often ate to the point of discomfort. I'm slowly learning how to eat just enough to keep my body filled for 4 hours. I don't need to eat enough for two days every meal. I'm safe and I will honor my commitment to feed myself again when its time. (Four hours ain't that long!)

I never thought I could do it. I really didn't. But when I decided to give-up grazing all day long, I just stopped. All of the mental energy I normally put into eating was turned towards my OA readings and contacting my new friends. A few weeks later, I decided to cut out the last of the sugar and I was able to again, without drama or grief. The sugar just stayed in my cabinat, where I had little interest in it. Understand that this isn't because my eating disorder wasn't so bad. I was bad, I tell you. Terrible. Its a miracle that I was able to do this. You can do it, too. Give yourself the time. Give yourself permission to just go and listen.

[llmw1951]

It helps me if I grab something & busy my hands. To occupy my mind with something other than Food! Knitting, Crochet , Laptop. Good Luck!

[Liz46]

Originally Posted by blog

Intuitive Eating and OA are completely compatible. I arrested my eating disorder for three years with the methods that Genine Roth spelled out in her dozen or so self-help books. Its really good stuff.

My eating disorder is a progressive disease. That means it gets worse as time goes on no matter how long I've been treating my body well. I had a ruff year and my binge eating symptoms started coming back. I went to OA and it has really helped. OA has been wonderful for me. I had no idea that I would be able to find support in getting back to a more gentle, self-loving way of eating. OA is a grassroots organization. That means that there are all sorts of people with all sorts of ideas about what "heathy eating" means. That doesn't matter. What does matter is that OA members come together to support each other in recovering from their eating disorders. We do use the 12 steps, which are really more about how to live so that your emotions don't drive you straight to the nearest donut shop. If you want structure and the whole "weight and measure!!!" thing, you can find that, too. Look for OAHOW to be sure you'll find this type of group. But you don't have to be that way.

Thank you for the info about OA. I've thought about looking into the website online sometime. I'm not so sure about going to meetings in our area because we live out in the boondocks and it would be quite a drive for me. I appreciate all the information.

[tommy]

Most of us who are compulsive overeaters know how they should be eating - but the compulsion takes over; the obsession about that cookie over there or that candy in the bowl and the like. When your mind is in serious overdrive like that it is painful. Just know that you are not alone. Being 99.99% of the time no longer subject to the compulsion I can tell you that it is an awesome feeling. OA helped me. For me a very precise food plan was also a factor - tons of veggies for volume, lots of protein, limited carbs and very limited processed foods. I work in an environment where some folks bring in baked goods on a regular basis that are (I have heard) quite good- I just say I can't eat sugar and leave. They think I am diabetic and so are not "offended" - works for me. The longer you are off that sugar drug the easier it is to walk away.

[thewalrus0]

I think I'm going to spend some time over the next few days just focusing on not overeating to the point of feeling ill. I won't worry too much about calories but I just need to not stuff myself or binge.

I am trying to set up a grocery list for next Friday that contains no sugar, or very little. I already have some go-to stuff that I know I like that contains no sugar, but I became slack on some things like spaghetti sauce and bread. I would really like to clear that stuff out of my diet for awhile. I think I drive myself to overeat by consuming sugar.

I have been eating a trail mix type snack that contains sugar and I think, at breakfast, it just spurs me on to overeat in the afternoon.

I am pretty sensitive to sugar. I like sweet things but fruit is sweet enough. I love smoothies. I'm going to start making a smoothie at night before bed and putting it in the fridge for breakfast in the morning, to drink while I'm getting ready.

I just need to really clean up my diet, I think. I was feeling so hopeless but I looked in my pantry and noticed I've been buying more and more packaged, easy to prepare stuff and just grabbing stuff off the shelves without really paying attention to the packaging.

So I'm going to start by trying to keep my eating in a 'normal' range where I don't eat to feeling sick and bloated. Then next week I'll stock up on some really good stuff and see how I feel after eating like that for a while.

Thank you guys. I was just really feeling down when I wrote this. I am still going to search for some help for my overeating though. I just need to start with what I know makes me feel better already, which is eating less sugar and less processed foods and eating more fruits, veggies and nutritious foods.

[blog]

Originally Posted by thewalrus0

I think I'm going to spend some time over the next few days just focusing on not overeating to the point of feeling ill. I won't worry too much about calories but I just need to not stuff myself or binge.

I am trying to set up a grocery list for next Friday that contains no sugar, or very little. I already have some go-to stuff that I know I like that contains no sugar, but I became slack on some things like spaghetti sauce and bread. I would really like to clear that stuff out of my diet for awhile. I think I drive myself to overeat by consuming sugar.

I have been eating a trail mix type snack that contains sugar and I think, at breakfast, it just spurs me on to overeat in the afternoon.

I am pretty sensitive to sugar. I like sweet things but fruit is sweet enough. I love smoothies. I'm going to start making a smoothie at night before bed and putting it in the fridge for breakfast in the morning, to drink while I'm getting ready.

I just need to really clean up my diet, I think. I was feeling so hopeless but I looked in my pantry and noticed I've been buying more and more packaged, easy to prepare stuff and just grabbing stuff off the shelves without really paying attention to the packaging.

So I'm going to start by trying to keep my eating in a 'normal' range where I don't eat to feeling sick and bloated. Then next week I'll stock up on some really good stuff and see how I feel after eating like that for a while.

Thank you guys. I was just really feeling down when I wrote this. I am still going to search for some help for my overeating though. I just need to start with what I know makes me feel better already, which is eating less sugar and less processed foods and eating more fruits, veggies and nutritious foods.

Its really cool that you are working on this already at 21. I didn't really get serious about dealing with my messed up eating patterns until I was thirty. Good luck to you!