0 for 2 in OA Meetings
 

Hey everyone... Last time I wrote I mentioned how I showed up for an OA meeting at noon and it turned out to be an Al-Anon meeting. They were very nice and let me stay, and one of the women spoke to me afterwards and said the meetings were Monday nights at 5:30. After that I spoke with the contact person from the OA site and she very nicely offered to meet me at the meeting place to give me reading materials, etc - this is because I couldn't go to the next meeting due to a commitment with my son. So I went tonight - and noone was there! I waited about 10 minutes and still noone showed. I knew from the woman that I met at Al-Anon that there were only 4 people in the meeting. After about 10 minutes - and unfortunately I didn't have any phone numbers with me - I left. It is summer and it is busy so I just figured that they had other things going on. I came home and called the contact person - she had lost track of time and didn't look at the clock until I called (45 minutes after meeting time). She was very apologetic - and I do understand - things happen. For instance, I can't go for the next two weeks due to another commitment (swimming lessons for my son). But, I was disappointed. That makes me 0 for 2! I sat there in the room by myself thinking - is this a sign? There is one more meeting in my town - but I had met the woman that went to this meeting, but now I just don't know what meeting to go to. Anyway, not really a question or anything - but just wanted to update on my...non-progress, I guess! Thanks for listening!

Wow! You were so brave to go too! Argh.
(Personally, I'd take it as a sign. How are these people going to be there to support you, when you feel you are totally loosing it? They've shown you they aren't reliable--at this point in time.)

Good Luck on your quest!

scrappy chic-

That IS disappointing. Sure it could be a sign-- but who knows what it means? It could mean that you should try the other meeting. It could mean that when you finally get to attend this meeting, you will enter it knowing full well that these are people just like you-- imperfect, with lives outside of oa, and that they cannot "save you." They can support you, share their stories, and give you guidance, but only your higher power can relieve you of your obsession with food.

I'm proud of you for your willingness to "keep coming back". Recovery is there for those who want it and seek it out-- and you are doing that. Awesome!

Hey Mabela and Marny - thanks for your posts. In a few weeks when swimming lessons are over I might try the other meeting. It almost feels like it was a sign to do that. But Marny, I really liked what you said - about them not being perfect and not able to 'save' me. I have always looked for that. 2 years ago when I lost 80 lbs I was seeing a nutrionist, and it was like I was losing the weight for her - not for me - but I didn't realize it until she quit last fall and then I gained 30 lbs back (since September). Sigh - I keep looking to others for motivation to be stronger than me - yet inside I know that isn't how it works. It's like I don't want to take responsibility for it or something. I never ask anything of anyone - why would I lose weight for myself? I lose weight for my nutrionist - my kids - not for me. In my head it makes no sense so I can't figure it out - but that is how it has been working. The great thing about going last night (and maybe here is the sign - who knows?) there was a box there that said - free to any OA member in need - please feel free to take. And it was all the books - the twelve steps, and two other daily journals and some other materials. Suggestions on where I should start? Thanks!

Wow! Free OA books?! That is so cool-- so you did gain something valuable by going to the meeting. It just wasn't what you expected! That happens a lot. When I turn my will over to my higher power, he repeatedly surprises me with where he takes me. It's never what I would have planned in my own head.

My opinion is that you should start with reading step 1 in the 12 steps OA book. After reading that, you will know for certain whether or not OA is for you. :-) You'll either want to keep reading, or throw the book away!

We're here if you want to talk about what you read.

Okay - I read it and I DO need to talk about what I read - so I am going to start another thread! Thanks!

Think about this: It may be sign that you should start a new meeting at a time of day when others like you would be able to attend. Early AM? Lunch time?

I can just about guarantee that you will be sitting by yourself for some time, but eventually, someone will show up. In the meantime, you can be studying the book.