Torturous Day
 

:fr:It's day 5 and I'm in ****:fr:

A co-worker brought breakfast burritos for us this morning. I was already dreading Burrito Friday at work(we do this every friday on day shift). Well, the other guy in training decided to keep up the tradition thru this. I could have died trying to refuse. On top of which, he said it would make him feel bad if I didn't eat it after I told him I appreciated it but I am on a diet. Why can't people understand.:?:

Then we got out in the field and someone had thanked the crew for something they had done last week by bringing cookies. These are really good people I work with so, ofcourse, they offered to share.:nono: On top of it all, we eat our lunches on the bus together. I had to sit there and eat my little 1/2 cup serving of pudding while watching everyone else eat their regular food.:(

On the way home all I seemed to hear on the radio was commercials for my favorite restaurants and when I drove by the shopping center by my home the smells of those very same restaurants seemed particularly strong.:cry: I finally made it to the house and it seems as though the media has decided that tonight should be the night to show me every food I love on TV.:stress: I turned off the TV, checked in here then took a nap.

What really sucks is I'm not even hungry.:shrug: It is the smell and the sights that are getting me along with the habits we talked about before. I get in the car and I start trying to decide what to get before I realize I don't want to do that anymore. And, once again, I'M NOT EVEN HUNGRY!!!

I think I'm just going to stay at the house tonight. I don't want to push the temptation. I'm pretty sure I've finally gone into ketosis and I don't want to lose it. I'm sure we all go through this at times. They say if you do something 21 times it will become a new habit. Hopefully, in another 16 days I will get in my car and go without planning on where to stop for food.

Well, thanks for letting me blow off some steam.

GOOD LUCK EVERYONE. KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!!!:grouphug:

Aw, I'm not on the same program as you but I totally and utterly understand, starting, or restarting, or any toughening up really, can be super hard. And honestly, those days won't end forever once you've been doing it for a while, but they WILL get fewer and farther between until you're thrown off when it happens rather than when it doesnt:) Keep it up, you'll make it!

I understand HELLLLLLLL!!!!
 

Operator265- OOOOHHH do I ever understand how you are feeling!! Tuesdays are our work meetings which has tons of amazing foods, breakfast burritos, sandwiches, dips, chips,chicken salad, cheeses and meats... and even DOVE ice cream bars!!!!!! I have been through this 3 times now- the last time was the worse and I was in an evil terrible mood!!!!! :devil::mad::mad::devil: I remember looking at everyone and feeling resentful and overall anger- "why do other people get to eat with abondonment and I am a fat cow who has to starve myself??" Of course I am not starving! I'm not hungry either... just tempted and miserable. And yes, I have my days when all I see are food commercials and thin people eating hamburgers and pizza and I glare at them and feel sorry for myself....

BUT I have done a lot of inner work- I say to myself- how many times was that ME eating all that???? Haven't I given myself permission to eat like a crazy person without reservations? I have done this A LOT in my life and it has gotten me NO WHERE except obese and miserable- definately would be foolish to think that doing the same behavior would bring me different results.... and ok so other people can do that- that is their issue.. eating like that does not bring good to anyone fat or thin. So I say, I chose to eat like this TODAY- if I want I will go back and eat that way again tomorrow if I feel that I need to- but TODAY I will not eat that way!!! Today I am powerful and strong. It is amazing how I feel inside if I know I am chosing to do this for myself- It is very awesome to know that I can chose to do otherwise, but I am my own advocate! I will not be ruled by food and peer pressure TODAY! I will handle tomorrow---- well, tomorrow. :)

We can do this TODAY ok??:hug:

Way to go not caving! :bravo:

I hear you on the commercial and smelling the food. I walked through the bread isle at the grocery store and I never noticed how strongly the bread smell is. My mouth literally started watering! Same thing in the cereal isle. Who knew cereal had a general smell?

Oh and then last night I was at a friend's watching a movie. I brought some fresh veggies knowing that she'd have snacks and it didn't even bother me till she microwaved some popcorn! I was SO tempted! I thought, oh, just one or two pieces won't hurt! I knew that one or two pieces would turn into a handful, then another, so I grabbed another bell pepper slice and tried my best to concentrate on the show.

We can do this! It's really hard, but we're strong enough to fight the temptations! We did it once, we can do it again! :grouphug:

:dust:

Thanks y'all for being here. I need you.:hug: I know I can do it and WE can do it together.

I just hit that really tired part. I have guys over putting it a heater/air conditioner and I was still able to oversleep my nap by about an hour. I know from previous weight loss this will only last a couple of days.

Well, from now on when I hit a rough spot I'm going to come here and look through all the threads until it passes.

WE CAN DO IT, YES WE CAN!!!

I totally understand the torture of watching other people eat real food, but I've found that after a month on this program (and 17 pounds gone) that things I used to love just dont taste so good anymore. I used to LOVE a good medium-rare cheeseburger and when i tried to eat one last weekend, i almost gagged!!!