Hi everyone! So it's been such a tough journey so far...waaay harder than ever before! I have been a yo-yo dieter all of my adult life. But I think maybe being in my 30s now means I've got to work a lot harder than in my 20s! Lol!

So I started at my highest weight ever about July of last year, lost 10lbs, then fell off the wagon. Good thing is, I didn't gain anything through March 25 of this year when I started again. I've lost another 21 since then. I'm more active than I've been since college and I'm feeling sooo much better than before! Finally, people are beginning to notice.

This past weekend, I met a "friend" at the gym. We were chatting and I said that I'd broken my personal record on the leg press and was so excited! Not bragging of course, just saying I was happy I'd come so far. Well she replied by saying, "yeah I saw you take a stroll on the treadmill and do a few sets. If you really want results, you should put some hard work in and push yourself a little more." I felt kind of wounded, so I politely said I'm doing more than I was in February! I said I'd lost 21lbs since March 25 and I considered that results! Anyway, more was said, but you get my drift.

I know I shouldn't let that bother me, but I felt so discouraged after that! I started thinking maybe 31lbs wasn't that much because I still had so much more to lose. I started feeling like it wasn't enough, looking in the mirror critically and feeling like my weight loss progress pics maybe didn't look much different. (I attached a few If you're interested).

Anyway this person used to weigh 235 and had their own struggles with weight before!! I hate when people get where they want to be and then feel like they've arrived and lose all compassion for others on the same journey!!! It seems so easy when the goal has been reached and they look amazing. How quickly they forget the fight it took to get there!!!

Anyone else been sabotaged by friends or family? How on earth do you handle that??

1. Congratulations! You look awesome, you're doing WONDERFUL!

2. Let haters be motivators. I have been fortunate for the most part that people I consider to be friends haven't had too much negative to say to me directly. That said, back in September I posted on my FB some progress pictures, and mentioned that due to my struggling (more days eating healthy than not, but I was having binge eating cheat days) I was a little higher than I had been around the same time in August. Well a guy "friend" commented something to the effect of "You better get moving, sweat to the oldies lol" or something like that, in other words trying to say I was messing up. It kind of hurt my feelings a little bit, but I thought about it, he was "right" though his delivery sucked it worked, and spurred me on to work harder. I am happy to say I'm over 40 lbs. lower since then. About your "friend" maybe she was feeling threatened (this is what I think), or maybe she thought she was being helpful but it is up to you on how to take it. Now when I see nasty remarks I let it motivate me to be better, which sadly for the "hater" wasn't usually their intended result .

Feed off of the negative & positive energy and comments that come your way, it was hard for me at first, now it is second nature. Remember why you started, that is what counts, not this person's opinions. Next time I'd just smile and say thank you, and keep doing what WORKS for you, and it is working!! <3

Thank you Candidcamster! I like how you took that negative comment from your Facebook friend and turned it around to motivate yourself. And maybe he didn't even mean it that way or think it would be hurtful, like you said about my friend. Some people just don't THINK! Regardless, you let it roll off your back...and let it take 40lbs with it. haha!
Thanks so much for the compliments and encouragement. That makes me feel better. Keep being awesome! You are in the home stretch!

You look sensational and you are also very beautiful

I had a "Fri-enemy" do the same to me when I started my journey and was in my first 25pounds lost. It was a real slap in the face to be coming from a women my size and someone I thought at the time a friend. Soon after I noticed she was toxic to me on many levels. It can almost be discouraging like something an emotionally abusive partner would say to someone. You being excited about setting these goals and achieving then should inspire. Friends or have them be just as excited as you.

I hope you are able to get past what she has done. If you check out YouTube and look up "changes after weight loss" and fine video of people talking about the mental & emotional changes that happen every single person mentions how some "friends" true colours come to light. I have enjoyed those videos much more then just hearing the states of weight loss. They talk about so many things most people would never thing or or know might happen. I remember this topic being covered in one I saw and it really lifted that weight I was carrying (thought Voice my hard work was wrong and stopped speaking about it all together)from the women that did just what you friend did. No matter their appearance insecure folks with feeling of inadequacies often see others acheivements or positive traits as a threat to then. It was explained in depth in one of the videos that really helped me understand soooo much.

I really hope you check out some of those videos because there will be a bunch of new challenges from folks in life both overwhelmingly positive and sadly negative to come. But you've got this gorgeous ����

Diamond, thank you so much for the lovely compliments and encouragING words. Wow, so you experienced the same disappointment I did! and being the same size you were!!! It's interesting - my friend was a few pounds heavier than I was when she started her journey, so I was baffled!
I'm going to check out some of those videos you mentioned. I'm sure it will be enlightening.
Almost to onederland I see!!! Awesome, awesome job!!! I'm sure you'll be there in no time.

You are doing great and look lovely! I'm sorry this lady said that to you, it's not very encouraging of her.

When I was down around 100 lbs someone said to me that it was too bad I still had so far to go. It felt bad to hear but I think some people are just really negative.

Hang in there and stay strong!

Tai,

That's horrifying!! I just can't even fathom why someone would think that was okay to say!! Ugh. So sorry for the disappointment I'm sure that caused for you.

Thanks so much for the kind words and compliment!! That's so encouraging. You stay strong too. We WILL get there no matter how long it takes. Don't quit! Keep being awesome.

I'm wondering if she meant it in a different way but wasn't very good at describing it. A more positive approach would be, "you're doing so awesome, let me show you a couple other moves that may help you make even more gains."
In any case, don't let her negativity ruin your awesome work. You've come a long way! My 30#s has taken me 8 months. It takes time to reach goals, and the difference between those who make it and those who don't are the ones who never give up!
You are rocking it and look amazing! Keep it up!

Nicki,

I agree with your idea for a more positive approach. That would have felt a lot better! Instead, it felt like what I was doing wasn't enough, my progress wasn't enough, etc. and that is so deflating! But like you said, I can't let that ruin all the work I've done! Even if I'm the only one who thinks I've made progress, I should be okay with that. After all, it's MY journey! Thanks so much for the encouragement and compliments. You're almost to your goal - That is awesome!! Keep pushing, be strong!

You too! Wonderland is around the corner for you. I have kept track of my weight daily for the last 4 months. Whenever I'm feeling angry at a plateau or upset it's going slow. I look back at all the logs and see how many times that has happened. It motivates me because it reminds me how far I've come. You have done a amazing amount of work and this time next year you will be happy you never gave up.

Nicki,

Yes, I'm so excited to never see a weight starting with a 2 again!! Thank you again for the encouraging words!!
Question for you - you said you log your weight every day. I weigh every day but I only log it when it's lower than the previous weigh in. Do you log whether it goes up or down so you can watch the fluctuations? I'm wondering if maybe I should do that to watch patterns...

Oh that type grates me as well. Everyone is different, I think there's wisdom in knowing and respecting one's own limits and not trying to please others. Festina lente. You look really beautiful in the pictures, btw.

I agree completely!! Some people naturally carry more (or less) muscle. Some are more sensitive to sugars and carbs or have hormonal imbalances, some need to overcome emotional obstacles every day of the weight loss journey. You're so right - everyone is different! Well at least now we know what NOT to do when we reach our goal weights.
Thank you so much for the compliments and for responding!! It's so nice to know somebody understands.