In Meg's post about the Do's and Don't of maintenance she listed this don't: "Dont' compare yourself to 'normal' (never overweight or obese) people. Even if we may look 'normal' on the outside, we're not on the inside. We aren't ever going to be able to eat or (not) exercise the way that they do and there's just no point in making yourself feel bad about it."

I found myself questioning this statement, but didn't want to hijack the other thread So I thought I'd ask my question in a seperate thread. Do you really consider skinny, athletic or ideal weight people to be "normal"? If obesity is at an all time high and 65% of the American population is overweight, doesn't that make being overweight normal? When I look around at my friends and family, I am the only person I know who is at their ideal weight, who exercises every day and who eats cleanly. They all consider me the abnormal one. What do you guys think?

I think you better consider yourself a fish in a bigger pond. The overweight state of Americans is not "normal". You will feel this right away once you travel outside the U.S.

Yeah, ditto to what Jayde said. In my country "only" 40% of the population is overweight. None of my family members are overweight. None of my friends either.

Ginny, I completely agree with your point. Coincidentally I've made that same argument to other people - that overweight and obese is the 'new normal'. Since the majority group is at least overweight, ideal weight (good term!) people are now a minority group.

When I was referring to 'normal' as non-overweight, I guess I was thinking about what we call a normal BMI (of 25 or less). It's kind of a funny situation when a normal BMI is abnormal, isn't it?

Good points about it being an American phenomenon. Not something we really want to be a world leader in, eh?

This is one thing I keep on telling myself to keep myself on track. When I'm feeling down and whiny, asking myself why I can't eat rubbish like "normal" people, and do no exercise like "normal" people, I remind myself that the reason is because "normal" people are actually far fatter than I am. It's taken a while to get my head round this, because I'm used to being the fat girl in pretty much every situation, but sometimes I just have to make myself walk down the street being *****y about people I've never met to remind myself that I'm FAR from normal now, and that the reason I can't eat what other people eat is because I don't want to look like other people.

I use that same idea as motivation in restaurants. While I'm walking to the table, I'll look around at the people and what they're eating. Then I tell myself I can't eat like them because I don't want to look like them. Maybe *****y, like you said, but I need all the help I can get.

That's a good point, and I live in the Southeast US which has an even higher rate than the rest of the country. But obesity is on the rise worldwide and I think it may become the norm in other places. I am curious what normal looks like in other countries. Do your friends and family who are ideal weight intentionally eat "clean" and exercise daily?

I'll be honest, and I don't live in the US, I don't have many frends and family who are an ideal weight. And those who are, eat pretty well and exercise regularly. I was a bit crushed when I realised that, as it finally killed the dream that I could eat what I want and still look good, but it was a good reality check.

My sister is the closest to beng an ideal weight and eating rubbish, but she's at the very top of her BMI range and although she doesn't eat well she has a very physical/sporty job as a scuba diving instructor which just about keeps her weight stable. Other than that, most of my friends and family are either careful or fat. There's very little middle ground.

I do the exact same thing. I look at what other people are eating and it reminds me that I don't want to look like that ever again. That is why I choose to eat my healthy foods and stay away from the junk. My husband can eat anything and not gain weight, but his relationship with food is completely different than mine. He only eats when he is hungry, I always ate if food was available even if I wasn't hungry.

I've found out that I have a hard time thinking about "normal", whatever that means. I can only think about me. My fatter friends think and obsess and worry about food, and my thinner friends think and obsess and worry about food. I think and obsess and worry and plan about food. I don't know what makes one group more "successful" than the others. Neither here nor there as far as my maintenance is concerned, only observations.

It seems like if I eat a reasonable amount of healthy food, about 2000-2200 calories a day with a decent amount of exercise (~1 hr/day on average), I maintain my weight. The problem is I never want to eat a reasonable amount of healthy food, I ALWAYS want to eat an unreasonable amount of unhealthy food. Does that make me normal? Sometimes, I find it helpful for me to think that, yep, I'm absolutely normal, physiologically speaking, if I can just get my head together. Other times I find it helpful to think of myself as "not normal" because it helps me get my head together.

We live in a priviledged place and time as far as food goes. Never has so much been available. I think (warning: opinion ahead) we are probably genetically programmed to eat more when it is available, after all who knew when the next deer would come by, or melon would be found, or if the harvest would be meager. Basic survival. So how do those instincts mesh with McDonalds, etc? What exactly is normal again, I'm confused. I mean, who knows when the next cheeseburger may come around. (Where is that sliding smiley that moved across, ate the burger and grinned--I need that one!)

So I've wandered. Normal. What is it? Who knows? For me it's a don't care: confuses me, scares me, use with caution.

Anne

Here ya go, Anne ... you write it cbg with a colon on each side.

This has turned into the most awesome thread! Thank you for starting it, Ginny.

This topic comes up once in a while when we're discussing macronutrients and percentages. There are several sources who give recommendations for the 'average' person. But what is that? Is the average person normal?

I don't know how to say this with humility but I don't think I'm average any more. I eat pretty well, exercise and lift weights and am no longer obese.

man.. I had a long post in here and went to quote myself.. like a dodo I guess I deleted the whole thing. oops...

The gist of it was that all my overseas relatives are of 'normal' (healthy) weight except for one neice. Here in the States it is a different story.

But I had more.. a post about work and how "normal" (obese) I am amongst some overweight teachers. But the post is gone.. into cyber space. bye bye post

Anne, I totally agree. But I think our priviledge life is more than the availability of food. It is the fact that we do not have to physically exert ourselves to get this food or live day to day. Together these two things are potent.

Jayde, you are absolutely right. I tend to fixate on food, since that is my problem area, but yeah, now we build entire towns without sidewalks, and you can drive down the streets and see nothing but garages, as if cars lived there instead of people. A weird weird world.

Anne