After months of continued shoulder pain following repeat arthroscopic surgery, I went to see a physiatrist. He informed me that I definitely have arthritis, that this is permanent and unfixable without a complete shoulder replacement, and that if was lucky and careful, I have about 10 years of use left before I need to get it done. In the meantime, I need to give up any weight-lifting that puts my arms above shoulder level for a "pushing" exercise (e.g., Saef's recently discussed overhead presses) if I want to get the full 10 years out of it. UGH. Just ugh. Along with my many work woes and the daily horrors coming from the Trump administration and Congress, this winter is just a nightmare.
I have managed to (presumably temporarily) reign in my evening eating by the seemingly simple method of making all carbs other than fruits and veggies off limits after 3 pm. I've been doing this for 2 weeks, and have lost 2 pounds. Not much, but better than continued gains.
Andrea Sorry it's not going well for you but on the 2 lbs.
Cruises are good for getting small tastes of places you'd like to go back and explore in detail, I think. I do love the Caribbean for shaking off a Michigan winter, but in terms of seeing/doing, I would put the Alaska cruise and our Danube River cruise at the top of the list.
Andrea, my mom is going through something similar and it's really got her down. It's a complicated story - now there's a bone spur involved and some bone death. They've told her that when the pain gets to be too much, schedule the surgery. She's in PT now trying to build up some muscles in the hope that it might buy some room for the bone spur. I battled severe tendonitis for years and having an arm out of commission is no small thing. It was what landed me at 3FC - eating out of anger and being forced into physical restriction. Congrats on avoiding that path!
saef, I read you loud and clear on not being able to enjoy a lull while it lasts. Dreading a chance to relax and maybe do some planning or proactive tasks isn't a good place to be.
Shannon-- have you cruised before? We've cruised Disney, Holland America and Princess. We've done Princess for the past several as they have "frequent cruisers" benefits like upgrades, priority check-in, etc. We've found there's more to do than you would think and plenty of down time to do nothing at all. Wonderful to not have to worry about driving home after dinner (especially if you drink), and they're generally a good value-- though you can wrack up charges with "extras" like alcohol, shore excursions, the fancier restaurants, etc.
Allison-- have you done the pricier cruises where "everything" is included? I'm wondering if money-wise we'd end up virtually the same by the time we pay our onboard fees?
Andrea-- I'm sorry about your shoulder. Dh waited a few years for his knee replacement as he was told to wait as long as possible as they don't last forever, but eventually it was affecting his quality of life too much and he got it done.
Going to the doctor today to see about my asthma? and hopefully get better!!!
Allison-- have you done the pricier cruises where "everything" is included? I'm wondering if money-wise we'd end up virtually the same by the time we pay our onboard fees?
Not yet. We've gotten complimentary upgrades for being "frequent flyers" on Holland America and appreciate that but have not quite delved into the all inclusive cruise--yet. Oceania is close. They often have several excursions "free" with booking and you can pre-pay some items like tips and a beverage package. That said, Oceania is a lot more expensive than Holland America or Norwegian (and I assume Princess). But we do prefer the smaller ship with fewer people on it, so don't mind the extra price.
This cruise, we did pay extra for our flights. On our last four European flights, we were relegated to the back of the plan with little chance of sleep despite the crew turning down lights, etc. This time we're flying business class and just yesterday I checked the Airbus 330 seating plan and basically business class and first class are in the same cabin--the one with sleeper chairs. I'm looking forward to that!
Maybe one reason I haven't gone on a cruise is that cruises seem boozy to me, and I don't really drink. Maybe a sip of champagne at someone's wedding. I do cook with wine, and try to get those small bottles they used to give out on planes for that, because the quantity is right and then there's none left over. But I don't drink at parties, or when I go out, and I order seltzer whenever others are drinking. It's not out of some principle, it's out of wariness. I think I'd like it too much. I think the way I regard food and the twisted relationship that I have with it strongly suggests I'd be susceptible to abusing alcohol. My mother's father was an alcoholic whose behavior laid waste to his marriage, his family, his health and the course of his life, and that spectacle seems to have scared my mother's whole family into near-abstinence, a habit that she brought into our family and into my upbringing.
I'm at 156 today. I don't have the right mind set, am having trouble getting back into it. I know it's really hard to switch over. Once I get into it, in that walled-off place where you don't eat, see how long you can go hungry, and avoid even the presence of food, I can stay there. But the transition of getting into that room is very hard.
Carnival is *definitely* geared toward the party mentality. Disney is far less so, but on the other hand, you have to deal with a whole lot of little kids running around. Celebrity caters more to the more sedate crowd without young children. Royal Caribbean has been a mix of everything, and Norwegian seems to be in the same mix. Tauck ... cannot say enough good things about them. It's pricey because it's worth it, and their excursions are simply bucket-list items. For instance, on our Danube River cruise - 1) we had one of the top five meals I've ever had at a restaurant in Budapest, 2) DS learned how to waltz in a palace in Vienna, in the arms of the principal soprano from the Viennese Opera, 3) heard Bach's Toccata & Fugue in D minor during a private concert from the organ loft of the biggest pipe organ in Europe (Passau). Talk about a trip!!!
I've not heard of Tauck-- I'll have to check them out.
Saef-- I don't drink at all. I'm with you.... when I do drink (besides the fact I seem to be allergic to it now), I'm not good at stopping and I know I worry I'd abuse alcohol if I started. So, I abstain. Princess is fine with drinking or not drinking. Carnival is definitely a boozy group from what I've heard. Holland America is geared more to the elderly for most of their cruises (though not all).
I went to the doctor yesterday. As usual, I should have gone earlier. My asthma is bad and they wouldn't let me leave without a nebulizer treatment and my pulse oxygen levels coming up to normal levels. Then I played a really dumb game with my meds/ pharmacies/ insurance. I was proud for not loosing my temper with anyone. Basically, someone messed up somewhere (the doctor most likely) and called in my prescription to the wrong pharmacy. So when I went to get it, they said it was denied because it had been filled elsewhere. Then I tried to find out where that was and was on a wild goose chase. I was told CVS in Target but they had no record of it. Got back to my original pharmacy and my insurance company and eventually was able to pick it up right when they were closing at 6:30 pm-- after the original was cancelled and they had to start over. Then, the 2 inhalers still cost me $173! I wonder how much my insurance even saved me?! At least I got them and I'm already feeling better today.
I wouldn't say that Holland America is geared toward the elderly at all. They have Club HAL for children on most, if not all, their ships, so the kids have a place of their own where they are supervised and the parents can go do their own thing.
That said, the Oceania ships really do cater to the older set. The last cruise had two people under 20 and I have to say the 15 year old looked bored most of the time. The 18 year old was there with her grandmother as a high school graduation trip. Poor girl had to push her grandmother around the ship most of the time.
I'll have to look at Tauck, too. I was thinking Viking was the way to go for river cruises.
I'm at 156 today. I don't have the right mind set, am having trouble getting back into it. I know it's really hard to switch over. Once I get into it, in that walled-off place where you don't eat, see how long you can go hungry, and avoid even the presence of food, I can stay there. But the transition of getting into that room is very hard.
Yes, yes, yes and YES!! I think it might have been you, Saef, who said a few years back that weight loss is simple, but not easy?
There's a discussion going on over on the 100lb club/08 Regainers regaining control and relosing! thread about how 'binging is self-care'.
It's an interesting idea and I can see how it might apply to me. I don't think I binge but I do eat when it's not time to eat sometimes - and this never used to happen. It's only started to happen since I have less time for myself, have more responsibilities and now my life is less unpredictable - and not in a good way.
Tell me what you think 'self-care' is as it's not an idea I'm familiar with, although it's started to appear over here a bit. It has to be more than pedicures. If I'm going to test out the binge=self-care idea in my environment I have to be able to fit self-care in before I start making the tea. That's now (about 1745) and I've already had a marmalade sandwich. (Remember that I'm trying out a low carb diet? Most authorities would not include a marmalade sandwich in that sort of diet.) What I really want to do is to carry on with other activities rather than make the tea so I'm not sure that self-care would work. Or is self-care something that if you do it regularly enough will magically spread itself over all of one's life, from day to day?
Looking forward to your comments.
No cruises here. It's just never come up. But I do feel very strongly about the wrongness of cruise ships in Venice's lagoon.
Andrea - very sorry about your shoulder. Quite right: UGH. I think my mother has developed arthritis in her R shoulder fairly recently and it certainly is fairly limiting. But she's almost 92 and you're nothing like that age. What does a 'complete shoulder replacement' replace?
OK. Got to go and make the food. It is actually already made (beef/yoghurt/spinach curry by the SO yesterday) but I have to hack out space in the kitchen and do some carrots and rice. Nothing really, in the grand scheme of things but I kick against the traces and shout. Increasingly - except that I eat instead. Such a stupid and ineffective way of behaving.
I started seeing the term "self-care" after the November election. It has a pop psychology, New Age ring to it, yes -- my understanding is that self-care is what you must do in response to stress. Maybe the terminology came about when it was urged of caregivers to stop caring for others to the exclusion of oneself, and to do some self-care instead. It's what you do when you need to unplug, downshift, re-group, burrow into your den and lick your wounds and heal from the scars of the daily battle. I'd say bingeing is self-care gone wrong. It feels like self-care initially but really ends up being self-abuse.
I'm at 154.8 this morning, after being hungry yesterday and then forcing a hard-stop after dinner, even though I could have eaten more, and wanted to. I'm starting to remember the discomfort of being restrictive. It doesn't feel like that warmth of self-care at all -- it's about being hard on yourself to get to a better place, like exercise.
Birchie If "self-care" is the same as "self-comfort" then that's what I do with food. I eat to comfort myself because I don't have any other form of comfort except my pets. I also eat to soothe any strong emotions, rather than expressing them.
As with so many concepts, it seems there is a fine line. In this case, I think it's between self-care and self-indulgence. Self-care is about making sure you have what you need to continue on. Self-indulgence is about having more than what you need, based on some idea of "I deserve it."
A marmalade sandwich could be either, depending on circumstances. Birchie, if you were eating it because you hadn't eaten enough all day, that might be self-care. If you were eating it as a reward-in-advance for making the tea, which you didn't want to make, that sounds like self-indulgence.
I like your explanation too, saef.
Sometimes a useful question is, "Will food solve this problem?" Most of the time the only problem food solves is hunger. Psychology is a different matter, though.
self-care is what you must do in response to stress.
This occasionally happens to me, usually when I'm trying very hard to lose weight and the day requires a lot more physical output than usual ->
Quote:
eating it because you hadn't eaten enough all day
Don't think I do this ->
Quote:
reward-in-advance
I would say that almost all 'over-eating' I do happens in response to stress. Mostly the long-drawn out over months / can't see this ending in the near future / in fact have no idea of what's going to be thrown at me next kind of stress. Also perhaps in response to shorter periods of stress but I'll have to think about this.
So DH and I have been doing Freshly meals 3x per week for dinner. They are well made and quite delicious--around 500 calories per meal and balanced without excessive sodium. I like that it gives me a bread from cooking those nights. The other nights, we either have leftovers of our Sunday meal or something light.
And DH was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes a year or so ago. He went through a class with a dietician or nutritionist (not sure as I didn't get to go with him) and he was given some dietary guidelines which I am already aware of having a sister with type 1 my whole life.
Fast forward to a couple months ago when I started noticing DH's breath stank like mothballs. Research (Google) said high blood sugar. Told him, he made a doctor appointment and he asked me to pick up a glucose monitor and accessories (his doctor didn't think it necessary for him to monitor his blood sugar.) First few draws were well over 200--too high. He saw the doctor, he doubled his metformin from 1000 to 2000 mg and added jenuvia. He's been on it for a week. His blood sugar has still been close to 200. (although this morning it was 130)
So I was researching meal delivery systems for diabetics and found several--one of which sends fresh food like Freshly rather than frozen meals. The price is fairly comparable. I'm thinking of changing although this system would be 7 days a week instead of 3. Do you think we should try it? If we want, we can add breakfasts and lunch as well.
Sorry it's not going well for you but 
on the 2 lbs.
Good to see you all here.
