Kitty, I'm getting piled-on today, as well. What I can't stand is the feeling of helplessness: That I have to passively accept it, because, well, that's just the way it is and some things will never change. It makes me get up and leave my laptop and go to the fridge for a bowl of cherries, then for a stick of string cheese. Neither of which solves the problem, of course. All they offer is momentary oblivion. How do we resolve those feelings?
I feel like, "This hurts. Someone just hurt me. And I couldn't do anything about it."
I have always envisioned this as being locked in a cage with a laptop. The cage is suspended in the air, above a crowd, and people standing underneath are able to shove sticks long, sharp sticks through the cage and poke at me ... in whichever way they wish ... and I don't have room to dodge the sticks ... and I just have to endure it.
So yeah, I know that feeling, and that's what I call STRESS. Helplessness or inadequacy is key to my feelings of stress. When I feel competent, and when I feel in control, I do not feel stressed. But how to get back those feelings?
yes, Saef, that is an apt description of my morning's STRESS
however, it is 105 degrees out and it seems the second half of my insane day will be less so, few people want to move.
I am waiting to hear about summer vacation time which I have already committed to working in an overnight camp, so my children can go w/me. I was told, I might not get the days I requested. Of course, there is no way we're not going, so I am now waiting for fall out.
this is after walking into work, finding myself pushed to the limit. now, for the fifth week in a row.
Last edited by kittycat40; 06-20-2012 at 09:28 PM.
I went grocery shopping and stayed completely out of the bakery department avoiding all temptation to buy a loaf of bread or any kind of a pastry, couldn't avoid the cheese displays as I did need to go to the dairy section but managed to get by the cheese without pausing. Got some delicious fresh raspberries, nothing like the yummy fruit you can get this time of year. I did buy a Mediterranean Orzo Feta Salad in the deli,it is so good. I think I can replicate it as it only contains sundried tomatoes,fresh garlic, artichoke hearts,basil, feta cheese and Orzo pasta in vinagrette.
Sorry you all are so stressed at work. I find, if I actually follow through and buy the binge food, I now can't eat even half of it. Gotten out of the habit I guess. As soon as I reach that limit I run all the leftover food out to the green bin and throw some dish detergent over it after I deposit it therein.
I used to say "I'll just put it away in here and not touch it again". Who was I kidding? OUT it goes.
thx dagmar, I was almost standing outside of myself, watching, thinking, OMG she's really buying it. that hasn't happened in a very long time. ach. still trying to lose it.
and I came home from work , to a broken air conditioning compressor. good times but we did get some very awesome school work desks for my sons (the best kind- hand me down, pretty good condition, fits their room and matching!)
thx dagmar, I was almost standing outside of myself, watching, thinking, OMG she's really buying it. that hasn't happened in a very long time. ach. still trying to lose it.
and I came home from work , to a broken air conditioning compressor. good times but we did get some very awesome school work desks for my sons (the best kind- hand me down, pretty good condition, fits their room and matching!)
See--the silver lining! Always look for the silver lining!
I've been off-track this week. I am guessing a lot of it is sleep loss due to the recent hot weather, and more significantly, switching up my work hours to starting earlier (7am instead of 8:30). I haven't done a good job of front-loading that hour and a half onto my bedtime; I MUST do better. The only victory was that after dinner last night, I was dog-tired and ready to drop, didn't even want to go to water aerobics ... and then did it anyway. Obviously, it didn't kill me, and I was glad I went.
So here's the question of the day: Injury notwithstanding, have you ever finished a workout and regretted it? I'm sure there's been literally hundreds of thousands of workouts racked up by the chicks on this thread, so I think there's a good sample size.
Becky, good job on going to water aerobics even though you didn't want to go. You are a better person for it !
I was rewarded this morning by the scale showing a decrease. I may have shouted Hallelujah ,! I am not sure, well , I did in my mind, anyway.
I'm having an okay kind of day - not good, but not particularly bad. All of a sudden I just feel irritable and frustrated. It is like getting caught in the rain out of nowhere - I don't like it.
bargoo, thanks for the reinforcement! Congrats on the drop!
shannon, yeah, I get that. That's when DH usually says something like, "Can I make you a stiff drink to help kill that bug up your butt?" I try to laugh my way out of it with some comedy. And a stiff drink. Hope your perspective comes back soon!
kitty, thinking about you and wishing for some relief for you!
Hang in there, kitty!
I find, if I actually follow through and buy the binge food, I now can't eat even half of it. Gotten out of the habit I guess. As soon as I reach that limit I run all the leftover food out to the green bin and throw some dish detergent over it after I deposit it therein.
OUT it goes.
but we did get some very awesome school work desks for my sons (the best kind- hand me down, pretty good condition, fits their room and matching!)
well, most often 
I've been off-track this week. I am guessing a lot of it is sleep loss due to the recent hot weather, and more significantly, switching up my work hours to starting earlier (7am instead of 8:30). I haven't done a good job of front-loading that hour and a half onto my bedtime; I MUST do better. The only victory was that after dinner last night, I was dog-tired and ready to drop, didn't even want to go to water aerobics ... and then did it anyway. 
Obviously, it didn't kill me, and I was glad I went.
