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-   -   Maintainers weekly chat October 10 - October 16 (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/living-maintenance/244821-maintainers-weekly-chat-october-10-october-16-a.html)

EZMONEY 10-15-2011 07:58 AM

Thank you so much DAGMAR I am ahead but not by much and the voting ends Monday.

I know how bad I felt a couple of months ago when Reba had to fast before her surgery...I was heart broken.....but 2 months after it and, yesterday, the vet said she is doing wonderful....so the pay-off for her was good!

SAEF I will try and get back later, I have a few personal thoughts on your marriage analogy I would like to share...

poor kitty! I wish I could help...ask me in a few months, my step-d started work at the cat hospital 2 days ago!

Heading out to pick up that GRAND-daughter soon and take her out to breakfast....yipeee!!!

bargoo 10-15-2011 08:02 AM

I am sorry,saef they you are having to go through so much turmoil at this time. As for your antiques and for finding what you have lost, if anyone can find them it is you.
This kind of reminds me of a friend of my Mother. She related ro me that she had once had a house fire that destroyed the house and everything in it. She went on to say that it wasn't long before she had replaced everything. She didn't have the priceless antiques that you had but she did have some nice crystal and art , all collected after the fire. And I do mean she had a houseful, that was how the subject of replacing things had come up. I can't help with your cat but I know how you feel, we love our animals , people who are not animal lovers do not understand this, but they are important to us and it pains us to see them be ill. I hope the vet will be able to help your cat.

Mudpie 10-15-2011 08:37 AM

saef I'll PM you on the cat/kidney thing. It's quite common and not dire.

My two are now going to the vet for their annual checkups. Misha will have to be knocked out so they can get blood. I will faint when presented with the bill.

And so it goes with pet ownership.

Dagmar :)

JayEll 10-15-2011 08:47 AM

I am over on the east coast of Florida for a 2-day teaching session with my Buddhist teacher. :)

saef, you have identified one of the basic observations that Gautama Buddha made about life. Nothing is permanent, nothing lasts, everything changes.

Some belief systems answer this with the idea of a heaven in which everything/everyone we love is restored and eternal. Other belief systems, like Buddhism, simply accept the observation. It's like the glass analogy I shared with you earlier. One day the glass gets broken. Eventually, it is bound to.

I don't mean that you shouldn't try to restore or replace the things you have lost, if it pleases you to do so. But be aware that the newly obtained things can also be destroyed, lost, changed, taken away--no matter how how hard you search, no matter how careful you are. The answer is not in holding on tighter.

We aren't "given" either joy or sorrow in this life. We do that to ourselves. You can go forward with joy and equanimity, or you can launch into an endless struggle to shovel sand against the tide...


alinnell 10-15-2011 10:11 AM

Dagmar, seriously they have to anesthetize the cat to get a blood sample? That seems to extreme.

Saef~so sorry about the frame. I wish I could help, but I really don't know much about antiques. My period of choice is mid-century modern.

I have to put together my menu for the week before heading to the grocery store this morning. I have no idea what I want, though. Then this afternoon we're off for our picnic with my in-laws.

Mudpie 10-15-2011 11:36 AM

pet stuff
Allison Mishka :sumo: weighs over 16 lbs. He is a formidable beast :yikes: when frightened. In the past he has managed to bloody every single person trying to hold him down to take his blood. It once took 4 of them to subdue him and that was the point I suggested knocking him out to spare everyone the stress. :mad:

Today it went really smoothly. He was quiet :angel: and co-operative. Mudpie also. They are old cats now and apparently they just want to get it over with.

First time I've seen the vet smiling when he brought Mishi back from the blood draw.

I wasn't smiling when I got the bill but it was about $300 less than I thought so that's a real bonus.

Good Saturday all!

Dagmar :faint: :p

Mudpie 10-15-2011 12:05 PM

a ramble
Interesting how different people react to loss. In my case a lot of it has to do with living entities, which in my mind are quite different than "stuff".

I love stuff but it's pretty interchangeable to me, except for art. Pets are all unique, to me.

I have pet owners who have wonderful dogs and cats. The animals sicken and/or get old and die. Some owners appreciate the pets they had and, when they get new pets, love the new ones for who they are now. Others always compare the new pets negatively to the old.

Still others replace pets with virtually the same (one owner is on her 5th black male labrador) but still have a particular favorite they compare everyone with.

I love them all. I embrace the new and remember the old.

Life is change. There was a wonderful segue in my mind between the pets and weight loss but it got derailed - :p

I'm starting to sound like some maudlin drunkard so I will stop now.

time to make lunch for the gang.

Dagmar :dizzy:

alinnell 10-15-2011 12:35 PM

Dagmar~either the cat is getting old or the vet learned how to disable a cat

bargoo 10-15-2011 12:40 PM


Originally Posted by Mudpie (Post 4071929)

I love them all. I embrace the new and remember the old. :dizzy:

Dagmar, I love this thought, thanks for sharing it with us.

Mudpie 10-15-2011 01:39 PM


Originally Posted by alinnell (Post 4071971)
Dagmar~either the cat is getting old or the vet learned how to disable a cat

That is totally cool! I'll have to try it on some of the more "active" puppies.

Dagmar :D

Megan1982 10-15-2011 01:41 PM


Originally Posted by alinnell (Post 4071971)
Dagmar~either the cat is getting old or the vet learned how to disable a cat

I don't suppose that works with dogs too? :dizzy:

Mudpie 10-15-2011 02:17 PM


Originally Posted by EZMONEY (Post 4068823)

OK I managed to get to the Good Clean Health page but I can't figure out how to "like" it. I did find Gary's recipe through his post on Fb - can I like the recipe from there?

Can you tell I don't use most of the features on Fb?

Dagmar :dizzy:

EZMONEY 10-15-2011 02:27 PM

DAGMAR I just posted this on your FB page ~

You have to be on Facebook then go to search...on the FB search bar...GOOD CLEAN HEALTH...then "like" it...then scroll down a few posts to the KIDS MAC and CHEESE and "LIKE" that...that gives me the vote....

thanks so much!

Working as a TEAM we can stop obesity!!! one vote at a time!... wink!!

EZMONEY 10-15-2011 04:49 PM

Thank you DAGMAR! Sorry it was so much trouble...you were not the only one that had the same problem....remember Onderchic-PixieMichelle?...she had a heck of a time, tried for hours until she got it....as with you, she was on a mission to accomplish!

Big hugs from me!!

EZMONEY 10-15-2011 10:36 PM

SAEF I wanted to share my own "marriage" story with you. Your analogy of marriage shares little hope. I can understand that, I was there once many years ago....21 actually....but I did have hope....sometimes very little though.

You mentioned that marriage should be forever, unfortunately more people than not probably don't feel that way. Anyone can dissolve a marriage here in America....but that is not God's intentions. We do not live our lives as God wants us to.

When I married I married for life...my ex did not obviously. After ten years she was ready for something else, pretty sure she is still looking for that...and I say that with the utmost of concern for her. She is a dear friend and quite frankly now more like a somewhat distant sister to me than an ex-wife. It has been 20 years....time heals many wounds if you allow it too.

When she left my world was crushed...and I don't mean just broken...CRUSHED!! I thought I would never find happiness again...never never never! I thought I would lose my kids.....back then dads were just beginning to have custody.

It is no secret here how close my kids and I are. So much of what I worried about for the couple years before she left never happened. My kids love their mom, spend time with her, but they have never had as close a relationship as I have had. Never have, never will. As a family we have (jealousy) issues with her from time to time...sometimes really heavy issues. But as a family we have gone through it and blow off as much of it as we can...the rest of the issues we "treat".

However, through all of the pre-divorce thru after the divorce I had hope. I had hope that if I continued to do the right things that my life would work out ok. And, as I hoped correctly, it did :)

However the hope I carried, incorrectly, for years was that my marriage would be restored. I prayed that my wife would not leave...then that she would come back.

Oh boy do I thank God for unanswered prayers today! :carrot:

It was 5 years before my hope turned into reality. I could not even begin to tell you how wonderful my life has been since the day we met. And I can assure you my life is not without heartache and pain. My marriage to Angie has not been perfect. It has been pretty amazing at times and down right :?: at others. I will say that those days are far-far in our past.

The relationship with my kids and Angie has always been amazing...her daughter resented me to no end...after all she was 6 when we met and had hopes her mommy and daddy would get back together. It was a struggle between us for years...and I can assure you I was far from perfect at times in the way I handled the resentment.

But I had hope....my step-daughter spent the afternoon here today. Left a couple of hours ago.... I got a hug :hug: and an "I Love You" as she left. I get those a lot these days. Just like I have always got from my kids. My kids have never left my house, me theirs, any situation or phone call without saying I love you Dad...and I have never failed to say it first or reply exactly the same to them. It's what we do. Now, it's what my step-d and I do. She has grown and we both have matured.

We spend a lot of time together in conversation, something she never wanted from me as a child. We do things together, something she never wanted when she was young. She was so difficult her mom sent her to live with her dad more days a week than with us. We live just 3 miles apart.

Those days are long gone. She just started working for a vet less than 2 miles from me. I assume I will be seeing her often. When she was in New York for college and away in Americorp she realized, she said, on how important family was...my family...me, her step-brother and step-sister.

Yes, sometimes it takes 5 or 6 years. Sometimes the dating pool is full of pollywogs..... but sometimes you find just that someone special that takes all the pain away.

I never thought it would happen, but I still held on to hope from my Creator.

I hope you find the hope you are seeking, whether it's for marriage or life....sometimes that is all we do have :hug:

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