LOL Jay, I guess we were just too distracted and busy to post! Congrats on the loss! How far down are you from where you start? How much left to go? (If you don't mind my asking.)

The gluten free diet is going okay. It's not really all that hard to follow -- yet. No difference so far but I wasn't expecting anything immediate anyway. I am realizing though that going gluten free isn't going to be enough of a change to make me lose weight. I guess I have to count calories too. Sigh.

I wish there was some magic saute pan that would detect what I put into it and tell me how many calories were in the result. The main reason I get sick of calorie counting is because it's a pain in the neck if I'm being creative in the kitchen, so if I'm counting I either have to stick strictly to recipes which have nutritional info on them, or I have to record every single thing that goes in the pan and then spend time calculating the result. This is why I have the technique of counting for a couple weeks then taking a week off. I know it works, I just wish there was an easier way where I could be more creative.

In any case I've been steady in the 139 range the past couple days so the vacation water weight is gone, and I'm barely under my red line, but I feel fat and I really want to be 133. 6lbs isn't that much. I can do this.

Good going, Jay. This different approach is really working for you. Excellent.

For me, this is a changeover week (probably fortnight) between the free fall routine of the school summer holidays and the close-hauled routine of the rest of the year.

The summer has been quite hard work for me. A lot of solo travel with the DB and some challenging assignments. Running, swimming and a bit of basketball (the 'tryathlon'). I've got very tired from time to time and food has been a bit sketchy or not really my kind of thing. I've often used it to give me energy to get through the next burst of action. And I don't need as much as an 11 year old. I can forget that.

I'm now back at the gymn which feels hard and makes me very hungry and tired even though I'm not doing very much. I'm giving it 10 days to a fortnight to settle down. I'm making sure that I eat a lot of deliciously prepared vegetables as this is the way to getting my proper appetite back.

I've also had time to look at my body in familiar mirrors. It's not how it looked in April, not at all. It's developed a kind of odd tubbiness around my shoulders and some awful, soft pudge in the front from my bra band downward. I cannot go round like this. I've made a note in my diary that I should be back into the food/gymn groove by Monday 19 September. Then I'll take it from there.

(Sounds pretty convincing, don't you think? Please encourage me.)

Up and down endlessly. I have some kind of minor stomach irritation (stress/depression related?) so my weight is staying manageable, and I ran two days in a row after not doing so at all for a week. Irene did lots of damage in my home zone but my immediate 'hood is okay. It's embarrassing how sore my legs got from raking and picking up leaves!

Glad to hear you're safe, krampus. I hope your tummy upset goes away soon.

I'm going to post here frequently to show my progress, otherwise things can drift in a busy life. I weigh myself daily so I'll show how it's going up and down as part of natural variation but also down over the long term. Down as in right down.

Friday: -0.25lb Cause to celebrate, I think. :welcome3:

Dagmar remarked on the Chat thread that being over-caffeinated makes her eat too many carbs. Now I'm a very sensitive person in lots of ways (you'd noticed that, hadn't you?) so this could affect me too. I don't drink coffee after midday as it keeps me awake but I do in the morning. One cup less today, I think.

OK, I'll get washed and dressed now and start the day.

Good morning all!

I really should join in on this thread, I am on the south beach forum nearly daily.

I lost 22 lbs 3 years ago on SBD, and got down to 122 (for about 2 days!). I'm okay not maintaining there, since it was very strict (read: I never wanted to go anywhere with my family in fear of calories). I leveled out about 124-126. Then it jumped to 128, then 132. I weighed in this am at 130 after my few days of south beach phase I (which is excellent at controlling cravings).

I haven't figured out where I'd like to maintain (126? 128?). I'm afraid to put too much pressure on myself to maintain lower, since then I become obsessive about it, which makes those around me somewhat miserable :D. I'd like to find some kind of happy medium.

I look forward to checking in! This "maintaining" thing is tough!

Jay - :cheer: Well done! Good grief, feel free to post the positive news at least a couple of times a day. If you do, it saves me time from having to go back and re-read all the Goals threads on the rough days. :D

Jessica - Totally hear you about the magic saute pan. I have a more whole-foods lifestyle and a spouse who cooks like a dream. The only defense I've had is conscious portion control. I can watch the ingredients that go into it, and know if it's low, med, or high calorie. Low calorie gets eaten with gusto and even seconds can be okay ... but after that, I start thinking about the small plates and the dessert forks. Funny ... it's never the good, home-cooked food that sends me into the tailspin, not even garlic-buttermilk mashed potatoes ... it's the beer, the chips, cookies, an open bag of chocolate chips. Huh. :crazy: OK, one exception - I did eat an entire bowl of cucumber slaw with a vinegar/dill dressing. Total damage: 40 calories. :rolleyes:

silverbirch - good news for you too! I am also looking forward to the "thrill of routine" with the start of the school year, and have had the exact same reaction about looking in the mirror. My waist is up 2", and my rear 2.5". Just ... fluffy. :P

krampus - best wishes for a quick tummy recovery. Embarassing to be sore, but it does feel good, doesn't it? :) Hope your community recovers from the flood quickly. I've been following Saef's and Fitmom's trials on the weekly chat - so much destruction. :(

twynn - welcome aboard!

I'm back in Whitby Ontario; hoping they let me go home before noon so I can enjoy my long weekend. I have been "mostly careful" with my eating, which usually translates into holding steady on the scale, but I had the most delicious lemon-pepper shrimp dish EVER last night, and I ate more of it than I really should have, with a 6 oz glass of Chardonnay. On the good side, I did linger over it and devote my attention to it. I think I can make it at home without too much trouble. On the interview front, it's all done except ... one last delay. The hiring manager (my friend) discovered this morning that the director, her boss, wants to review all the notes from the interviews. Sigh. And of course, he's on vacation and won't be back til Tuesday.

Welcome, TwynnB!!! I'm thinking once I get back to goal I'll follow more of a SB diet. I've got the cookbook, so I should be good to go. I don't need to do the diet phases, just maintain using the principles.

I'm down half a pound despite a run-in with some goldfish crackers. They'd been in my pantry since our vacation (impulse buy for the road trip--I crave salty or sweet when on long drives. The jerky was a better choice here). I knew the package was not open so I didn't open it so there was no temptation. DS opened it. Gah! Had to have some. I'm going to ask that he dispose (aka eat) all those crackers and the sun chips I bought and the Doritos he bough while we're on vacation.

Welcome Twynn!

Krampus, how is your tummy doing today?

Silver, I love reading your posts. I read them in my head with a British accent. :lol: It's funny how different various turns of phrase can be between British and American English.

Becky, keep us updated on the job situation.

Allison, good job on the 1/2lb.

Still 139 here. I've been trying to get more exercise. No problems yet with gluten-free. Between rice, oats, kasha, and quinoa, I think I can get my fill of grains. Have not counted calories yet since last night was more kitchen experimenting. I may make a stricter plan for next week.

Birchie - I'm glad there was some downward scale movement for you! I think you can definitely get back on track with exercise by 9/19. Absolutely.

Becky - annoying about the wait until Tuesday to hear on the job. Hope it is good news. :)

Jessica - glad the gluten free is going well, and if you find the magic skillet send one to me, too.

Allison - I love goldfish crackers. And mini saltines. And pretzels. And wheat thins. And on and on and on. I try to not have them in the house, otherwise I wind up in the snacky free fall I was in yesterday.

Twynn - Welcome! I also struggle with trying to maintain too low - it sets me into an OCD tailspin that gets crazier and crazier. I'm working on a happy medium, too. Though I'm a little high right now.

Krampus - hope the tummy feels better, and glad that you didn't get too much damage from the storm.

I bought some digestive enzymes a few weeks ago and took those for about two weeks to see if it helped with the weird tummy issues I had going on, but I don't think they made any difference. I forgot them a few meals and didn't notice any big change. I'm thinking I might try them again next week and see.

Reading this thread is, as we say here, like waiting for a bus. You wait for ages and then two or three come along at once. All these posts. Can't keep up.

:welcome: Twynn! I've seen you around from time to time. This place is full of good people and we love new ones.

I had two cups of coffee this morning and have had a headache all day. Could be a bit of caffeine withdrawal, could be my frequent 'early days back at the gymn' headache, getting up at 6am for school, or just plain exhaustion after the summer. I'll stick it out with less coffee, more sleep and renewed gymn work.

Becky - steady as she goes with the interview stuff. Sympathy but Tuesday will soon be here. We can get rid of this extra stuff. We can.

Allison and Shannon - crackers? Bad news. I don't eat them except I have polished off quite a few after buying a box for the others. What a stupid thing to do. Stupid. Stupid. What I should say is that I shouldn't buy them. I never used to so why did I? There's no answer to that.

Jessica - Thanks, I do my best! Glad gluten-free is going well.

Shannon - stoneground, wholewheat bread will help you out in that department but there may be associated difficulties (butter, honey, jam, cheese, for example). Thanks for your encouragement.

The pain is terrible so I just had a bowl of muesli for tea before taking the DB to cricket. That's muesli, whole milk, banana, yoghourt and some honey. For heaven's sake. That is not a frugal meal scraped together with large amounts of luck during the Thirty Years War. That is a feast which should be eaten very rarely (by me, at least). You know, in the mediaeval period (several centuries before this War), people in Britain ate about a teaspoonful of sugar a year. I don't know whether honey is included in that. However. I think I'll ponder the historical angle a bit.

Shannon, have you tried the Citrucel yet?

Silver, I hope your headache gets better. It could very well be due to the lower amount of caffeine. I remember when DH went cold turkey on caffeine and had horrible headaches for about two weeks.

As for the crackers . . . going on a gluten-free diet is a sure way to avoid that problem! :lol:

Jessica - is your DH still off caffeine? Was he taking a lot? And did it do him any good to stop?

Silver, yes, he is still off caffeine. It has been about 10 years I think. I don't know exactly how much he used to drink. He went through a phase where he drank a lot of Mountain Dew, then switched to Diet Coke -- this was all during college -- then he had an internship where there was free coffee available all day and he used to drink multiple pots of coffee (yes, pots, not cups). For some reason I want to say it was 6 pots per day but I wouldn't be too sure of that number. I don't know if he was having any negative physical effects from it, but we both agreed it couldn't be good for him to be drinking so much coffee. He had some time off between the end of that internship and the beginning of the school year when he was at home with his parents, so he quit the coffee and basically slept and had headaches for two weeks.

In any case once he got through the withdrawal he no longer had any caffeine headaches. He occasionally now will drink a Coke or a cup of coffee, but only like once every six months to a year. He doesn't have any cravings for it or anything like that.

Thanks, Jessica. That really was a lot of caffeine! I don't do soft drinks and I only drink four cups of coffee (max) a day and very weak tea without milk. Occasional chocolate but this has crept up in the past three months. Dagmar's observation that she eats more carbs if she's overcaffeinated has made me think around it as I'm definitely eating more carbs and that doesn't suit me. I think, though, that my basic difficulty is tiredness so I'm working on this but also reducing caffeine.

Allinnel - they're a great group of people over at SBD. Some people knock it, but there's a lot of people I know that eat south beach style without knowing it....lean protein, lots of veggies, some fruits, little oil and nuts. Little sugar, no processed. Basically, eating healthy!

I was happy today...I was supposed to meet a friend for breakfast, and she cancelled on me last minute. So, I still went by myself...and ordered the greek omelette (spinach, feta, tomatoes)...theirs was VERY dry, not much oil at all (any?!). You get two sides, so I did the fresh strawberry cup and fresh fruit cup. I ate most of the fresh fruit, 2/3 of the 3 egg omelette, and took everything else home for later. Considering this place is the BEST IN THE WORLD for BACON and pancakes, I'm pretty happy!!!

It's going to take me a while to catch up on all your names!!

I go over there often. I usually check out the recipes section. I'm particularly fond of a chicken recipe that is so easy and tasty. Chicken breasts, topped with salsa, put in the oven for half an hour, add a little cheese and let it melt and voila! Dinner so easy. Just add some veggies. It actually works with the plan I'm on--Medifast.

Silver, have you checked with a doctor about your energy levels? If you are tired despite getting enough sleep it could be something medical going on (thyroid, etc.).

Twynn, good job getting the healthy breakfast!

Allison, can you point me toward that recipe?

I'm trying to figure out what to do to lose weight. I'm kind of conflicted. On the one hand, I am exercising a lot more, but pretty much eating the same. I'm not sure whether I need to eat MORE to fuel the workouts in order for my body to lose some fat or I need to eat LESS since when I'm not working out I'm pretty much sedentary. I haven't been tracking calories but my estimate is that I've been eating 1600-1800/day this week. Before I had to drop to 1400 to lose weight. I had thought maybe playing with the composition of my diet would possibly change the numbers, but so far the gluten-free diet has not magically dropped any weight.

I just realized that so far today I've basically eaten fruit and dairy. I had yogurt + nectarine + a little bit of flaxseed, oats, and granola for breakfast, then had a banana + milk smoothie for a snack before my bike ride, then had cottage cheese + grapes for lunch. I think dinner is going to need to involve a lot of veggies.

Jessica~The recipe is somewhere on the South Beach recipe forum, but here it is as I remember it.

Boneless chicken breasts (one per person--expand as needed)
About 2-4T salsa per chicken breast
About 2T grated cheese (Jack, pepper Jack or Mexican blend) per chicken breast

Cover a jelly roll pan in aluminum foil (for easier cleanup). Spray with Pam. Place chicken breasts in pan (I've used frozen, unthawed breasts as well as thawed both with success--frozen is great if you've forgotten to defrost earlier). Put salsa on top of each breast. Bake at 350 for 30 minutes. (Perhaps a tad bit longer if frozen, although I haven't noticed a need for that). Put grated cheese on salsa, return to oven until cheese is melted. Serve.

I love this as the chicken stays really, really moist.

Thanks for the suggestion, Jessica. I try to steer clear of doctors, mostly, as my experience has shown them to be frequently clueless and often dangerous.
My tiredness is normal, I'd say: 'sandwich generation', work for myself (feast or famine), SO on the point of several breakthroughs, me on duty without time off most of the summer. And you know I'm seeing the physio. I haven't been able to do 'proper' exercise for ages. So I think I'm OK but I could do with a break, some well-paid work and a properly functioning back, core and knee. Ideas???

0.25lb up this morning.

Fresh inspiration - a good afternoon browse!

http://blogs.babble.com/family-kitch...o-inspire-you/

:drool:

Hi Everyone,

I have been lurking here for a while and I am ready to jump in. I lost 33 lbs last year and gained 13 back this summer. I realized that the problem was that I jumped into "normal" eating again. With some health issues in the family and relatives visiting, the scale went up without me noticing. Somehow I magically thought that once I get to my goal, I will be able to eat as I used to.

This time, I am smarter. I think that the key for me is to have meals that satisfy me completely and then have days when I stay under my calories. I have been weighing my food pretty rigorously this time around and I am amazed how many more calories there are in seemingly innocent foods (creamy soups are my weakness).

So, I am at 132.6 this morning and my goal is 125.0. 7.6 lbs to go.

I enjoy this friendly place to keep me at it. So, thank you.
Vera

Road taken, :welcome: Glad to see you join in!

Yes, the calorie shock of some foods is really something, isn't it? Check out some calorie counts for chain restaurants sometime--most have nutrition information on their websites these days. It's appalling what they pack into some foods.

Good luck on redefining "normal eating"!

Jay

SB, it's so hard to balance it all....and you do it with such grace. :hug: Congrats on the .25!

Jessica, how are you handling the gluten-free diet?

Twynn B and Road Taken, welcome to the coolest corner of the entire internet!! :wave:

Allison, I'm sending that method/recipe to DD at college. She bought a bag of frozen chicken breasts and needs ideas!

As for me, keeping on keeping on. Actively avoiding the scale and doing 2 steps forward, one step back with food and activity. I realized I need to drop some pounds in order to exercise the way I want to. My knees are yelling at me.

Come in, kittycat! Come in, kittycat! /over

We haven't heard from KC recently. Although my grasp of North America's geography is weak, I think she lives in Irene territory. So hoping you and the boys are OK, KC! :hug:

:welcome3: roadtaken!

Midwife, thank you. You've made me blush! It is very hard at times, as you know. Very good to hear you're trying. Two steps forward and only one back is, overall, moving in the right direction.

My Sunday report

Sleep: quite good but only 7.5hrs. I need more than this. I read too late last night. It was something for myself after a day of reorganising, cleaning and ironing. (SO made all the food & did all washing up. And is doing so today as well.)
W: +1lb
E: moved lots of kindling as part of clearing up after the painter and getting ready for winter. Sawed up an old plum tree.
F: passable. Too many crackers as part of lunch. And a bowl of muesli for supper. I feel rather stout.
Other: just two cups of coffee as part of breakfast at the kitchen table. I'm not sure whether too much caffeine triggers carb eating in me but it's worth investigating. So far, I've been eating many more cracker-type things plus muesli (possibly in an attempt to keep going) but my thinking is that this should even out when I get enough sleep under my belt.

Per FB, Miss Kitty et al. weathered Irene in one piece (pun intended!)

Thanks, midwife! I'm going to clean my teeth and turn out the light. SO is still washing up. He is a good person.

Thank you for all the warm welcomes. On my morning run, I was thinking about this forum and about how my family responds to me when I say that I want to lose some pounds. They start telling me I am thin enough and that I should stop or I'll die or something like that. I should add that I don't and never had an eating disorder.

I wondered if you all have similar experiences and how you respond. I'd like to empathize since I've been learning Nonviolent Communication but I find it challenging. My sense is they feel threatened at some level that they are not thin enough or something. Regardless of the motivation, it sounds very invalidating and yucky inside. Any thoughts/advice?

Other than that, for the last week or so, I have been making myself little containers of food for the following day (I love the idea of bento boxes). I know exactly how many calories are in each and at the end of the day, I subtract what's left over and prepare food for the next day. That way, I know exactly what I am going to eat and it is all in one box in the fridge. It has been so much fun to eat that way. Has anyone tried it?

Hey again, Road taken.

Do your family members have any cause for their concern? You don't list your height and weight, nor do you have to--just wondering where you're at with BMI, etc.

In my experience, I did have a friend caution me about losing too much when I was at my low weight, which was 147. Now that is just not too low for me! No way!

I think that what happens is that one's face, legs, hands and arms tend to become thinner looking while there is still plenty of fat on the torso. And since those are the places that people can see, they judge from that. I was looking thin in the face and had bony hands at 147, even though I was thick in the middle.

Jay

Roadtaken, I don't tell anyone as I don't think it's their business. As I'm like this about lots of subjects, friends and family are used to it. Not sure if that's at all helpful to you.

Monday

Sleep. Torrential rain woke the SO who woke me. Or did it wake me who woke the SO? Either way, it was a poor night even after I'd shut the window because the noise was so loud. We are like the living dead now.

W. -0.25lb

E. Have seen the physio who thinks I'll be fine in a fortnight and won't need to see her again. This flare-up is quite understandable following the kind of summer I've had, she said.

F. Quite good. No supper which is my usual m.o. so getting back to normal.

Other. The symptoms, niggles and complaints of the last few days can mostly be put down to an impending (now arrived) period. I can't wrap my mind around this conundrum: how is it that I forget, regularly, the signs and even the possibility of something I've known for over 40 years? Is it something deep and psychological? Midwife? Anyone? Is this a known syndrome? "The Blank Period Syndrome", for example. Well, it's a fact in my life, certainly, so do remind me of it next time things seem a bit odd in silverbirch country.

Well, I think it is hard to be objective about subjective experiences and when we are in the middle of something, it's hard to say, "well, "X" of course!". Retrospectiveness provides lots of answers. Of course, I am so done with periods anyway!! Psychologically done with them. So I do tweak my birth control to keep them rare. It helps me a lot.

I am goofy though. Right now I am hugely forgetful of many many things and I'm not sure what's going on. Trying to simplify with hopes that will help my failing memory.

Pre-workday blues. I am expecting to get word on the job tomorrow, but since very little has gone right with this thing so far, I am refusing to spend much time noodling about it. If it is right, it will happen, and if it does not, then it is a message that I must get off my fanny and invest energy in rescuing myself.

Saef, I read your check-in over on the weeky thread. It is clear that you are a Writer - I had my son (he's 12) read your post, and not only was he also nearly in tears, he said he wanted to gargle too! You have painted a marvelous and terrible picture; please know that we are riding along in spirit, and wishing you an endless well of strength.

Hi, I haven't posted on 3FC for a while, but this is me declaring my intention of losing the 8-some pounds I gained over summer break staying with mom and eating ice cream. Haven't yet figured out how I am going to work around the tendinitis. Maybe swimming.

School starts Sunday! And the only shoes which fit the rules the physical therapist gave me are really ugly. Sigh.

Jay - I am at a healthy weight of 131 as of this morning at 5'9". My goal is 125, which is BMI og 18.5. I started my weight loss at 158 after eating a book about nutrition by the National Dietetic Association.

I was amazed to realize that the overweight pattern in my family is not due to genes (as I was always told) but due to the stuff we eat. I stopped being a victim and realized that by making little changes in how I eat, I don't have to ever be overweight.

I talk a lot with my grandmother who survived the war and we often share how much we weigh (we do yoga over skype almost every day). It is somehow threatening to her to hear that I am pursuing my goal of 125.

Silverbirch - It sounds like a good strategy to not share with family about my weight goals. I will try and just not talk about it unless someone asks me. I have a need to be validated by my family and I think that's where I make the mistake.

Thank you for being here. It is so much easier to be conscious when knowing that you all are doing this as well.

[QUOTE=silverbirch;4020091]Come in, kittycat! Come in, kittycat! /over

We haven't heard from KC recently. Although my grasp of North America's geography is weak, I think she lives in Irene territory. So hoping you and the boys are OK, KC! :hug:

Hi :hug:
Wow, I veered into the dark with my eating. Scale up to 135. Haven't seen that since 2008 :o

Irene came and devastated our town. Really and truly devastated. On the news, devastated. Thankfully, we have minimal damage and inconvenience, compared to many others.

Will now be posting on the food and exercise log. My operation has jumped to a full decade. Still fitting into my big clothes but barely. Off to the treadmill. Food so far good, for today.

Hello all now and personals later when I report back with on plan details ;)

:welcome: Road and Bronze!

Bronze, what sort of tendinitis do you have? I have struggled with tendinitis in many different places as well.

Speaking of physical therapy and tendons, does anyone know if home therapeutic ultrasounds are actually as effective as the ones PTs use? I'm thinking about getting one but I'm afraid they might be a scam.

138.6 today. Either normal fluctuation, or I'm finally starting to lose a little. Minimal splurging this weekend -- my "cheat" was half a box of Junior Mints. This coming weekend DH and I are going out for my birthday so it will be a bit more splurgey. Haven't decided where we are going yet or if I will try to make it a gluten-free meal.

The gluten-free diet is still going fine. I'm also exercising a lot more and wearing splints on my feet at night. I think my feet might finally be improving a little bit but I'm not sure yet. Also considering trying the "gelatin cure for arthritis!" Supposedly eating a packet of plain gelatin per day is supposed to help with arthritis. I'm skeptical in general, and I don't really have arthritis in the normal sense of the word, but it couldn't hurt to give it a shot. My problem does seem to be connective tissue and eating gelatin is basically like taking a connective tissue supplement. I may stop for some on the way home today and try it starting tomorrow. Basically I'm open to trying anything that will not have potential adverse effects. So I'm fine with trying the gluten free diet or basically eating a bowl of sugar free jello every day, but not with pill-type remedies.

Hey Jessica! :wave: Just FYI, gelatin is protein, and all protein gets broken down into its components in the digestive system. Then the components get reassembled as needed. So, if having gelatin helps increase protein intake, it makes sense that it might help arthritis. Plus the components of connective tissue are somewhat specific, and by eating gelatin, you make sure you're getting all of them. It sounds good to me.

ETA: Where is ICUwishing? I'm hoping everything goes well today!

Jay

Hiya, Jay - thanks for thinking of me. :) Final review meeting is at 4:30; my friend says the boss is just the curious type, not a meddling type, so she has high hopes that there will be news soon. She is being the perfect professional - not once has she implied anywhere in writing that this thing was a done deal. I'm quite proud of her reserved demeanor, as it's very out of character for the personality she displays most of the time (transparent, outgoing, and a little crazy).

DH suffers/suffered with osteoarthritis in his knees and ankles; he's had surgery to clean out one of the knees. The ankles were really hurting him, so about a year ago he started on the golden raisins/gin combo (box of golden raisins in a glass dish; pour gin to cover - eat exactly 7 raisins per day). He figured he had nothing to lose, and he is definitely the consummate skeptic. Remarkably, he is pain-free these days. I have tried to find the scientific basis for this with little success, but have found many testimonials for its efficacy. Just throwing it out there! At my house, we gravitate toward the traditional (lost) practices before we let "modern" medicine take a shot at us. :D

Any news, Becky?

Noooooo. Sigh. Maybe tomorrow?

Becky, looking for the fingers crossed smilie but cannot locate--
my fingers are crossed :hug::carrot::goodvibes:
\