[silverbirch]

Dagmar - had you logged in? I get the ads in the posts if I don't.

[Mudpie]

Originally Posted by silverbirch

Dagmar - had you logged in? I get the ads in the posts if I don't.

That was it - thanks! I usually remain logged in but sometimes they boot me out for no discernible reason.

Dagmar

[alinnell]

Iris~yes, it is rather drastic, but I've done this several times before. I got bored with it and let it grow out--that took over a year, and then boredom set in again! The last cut was flattering in my opinion, but I got no compliments. So far several people have commented on how good this looks. I'm still not sure if I'm totally sold on the cut, but it was tons easier to style this morning. I'm thinking I should have gone shorter...perhaps in November! I was thinking of re-visiting an old style I had for a couple of years--the Beckham bob. But everyone said "you've already done that" so I went with the cut that 90% of my friends and family said would look good on me. Anyway, this is what I got: my current cut, and this is the Beckham bob that I used to have. This is what I may do in November shorter. What do you all think?

Meanwhile, the haircut reinforced the fact that although my head looks ok, my body doesn't match it and I feel frumpy. It made me be a bit more diligent last night and I didn't eat quite as much as usual and I did cut my alcohol quite a bit. I got up this morning and got in a good walk and my knee isn't hurting, so it's all good. A nice breakfast of scrambled eggs and I'm ready for the day!

[iriswhispers]

Allison - I like the bob, but then I have always had long hair and the really short one would really be scary for me!

I know what you mean and hate that "frumpy" feeling. It helps to do my hair, put on some makeup, and wear cute shoes - but I still am aware of the bulges threatening to re-emerge, especially on my hips. The only thing for it is exercise! Makes me feel 10 times better.

My BF works for the Arizona Cancer Center and this week they're having a regional conference on skin cancer... this means I get free happy hour food and drinks tonight and free fancy dinner tomorrow. While I am excited about this, it's prohibitive to my evening workout. Guess I can't have it all!

[WaterRat]

Alison, I can't see the FB pic, but I like the current one from the picture you show. I wouldn't go shorter, but that's me. I had my hair cut shorter in August, and I'm currently in the process of growing it longer again - just didn't do it for me. I'm happiest with it about 2-3" above shoulder length. We are going to Hawaii for 4 weeks in January, and I need to figure out what I'll want for there - my hair is fairly thin with little body, so gets very flat and straight in humidity! I often get a body perm and that's probably what I'll do, but that means some product to avoid total frizz. My DH is bald - that's the easist for sure.

I had a dr's appt Monday and - sigh - the meds that made me feel dreadful did have a very positive effect. After we talked about the side effects vs the positive effects, I agreed to keep taking it at the lowest dose, but starting after I get back from vacation. If after a couple weeks back on it I still have issues, he'll change it to another. But he was thrilled both with my A1C levels, and with the fact that I'd lost 6 lbs. I'm sure part of that was that I couldn't eat a lot of the time. Not the healthiest diet, that's for sure.

Yesterday we went to Anchorage to see our tax/financial advisor. She is really great, understands exactly where we want our retirement lifestyle to go, and pretty much how much risk we're willing to take financially (not much ). So we mapped out a pretty good plan for the rest of this year and the beginning of next. After we went out to dinner at a Vietnamese place we like (and brought home 1/2! yay) and then to see Social Networks which we really enjoyed. I recommend it.

So today DH has gone off with one of his buddies to the gun range, and I'm doing laundry and gathering stuff I want to take on vacation. I leave Sat night for 5 days in Flagstaff at an Elderhostel (now officially called Road Scholar) program on photography/Photoshop. THen on the 15th I go to Oregon to meet with 8 friends - 7 of whom I met on 3FC back in the late 90's! (The other I went to college with and we've stayed friends) We had a meet-up of most of us in Las Vegas in 2001, and most of us have visited with others in the meantime, but usually in groups of 3-5. There are actually 10 of us who still are tight (on our own forum now), but one has a kindergartner she can't leave and the other a new job. We'll have a long weekend on the Oregon Coast, and then I'm meeting a RL friend from here (who is visiting family in OR) for a few days just hanging out in OR/WA til we come home on the 23th. I'm excited to get back to warmer weather for a bit, and to see everyone.

[Mudpie]

. . . is this weekend. I am roasting a duck and serving it with a wild rice/brown rice mixture and dilled green beans. We will have one pumpkin tart each for dessert.

Since it's on the Monday no alcohol will be involved.

I am dragging DH out paddling on Sat., hiking/biking on Sunday, and Monday he can recover while it rains.

This will be the first (of many I hope) Thanksgiving where we will not stuff ourselves.

TGIF - have a great one all!

Dagmar

[Cally Callahan]

Mudpie, I saw a piece on "turducken" on the am news today.

My thanksgiving plan for my small group on saturday is slowcooker pineapple chicken with brown rice and roasted veggies. Not very pilgrimish.

I also have another dinner with the boys family on Monday. That one will be difficult to navigate I'm sure. My plan includes bringing MORE roasted veggies, and filling the majority of my plate with them and salad. I'm more of a Christmas person anyways.

[paperclippy]

Happy Thanksgiving to the Canadians in advance!

We are having our own Thanksgiving drama here about who is going to be hosting Thanksgiving this year. Not sure what the outcome will be yet but hopefully nobody's feelings are hurt in the process. Personally as long as I get sweet potatoes, turkey, and grasshopper pie, I'm satisfied.

[Mudpie]

So one set of my clients is splitting up after about 15 years together. I'm a little worried that she won't be able to afford the dog walker - me - any more but she's said nothing yet.

The split had me thinking about my own relationship. I love DH but lately he's seemed to be trying to remain unhealthy and unsuccessful, despite my best coaching efforts.

Last night he got drunk (among other things) and stayed up until around 2:30 a.m. I asked him what he was doing and why and he said "I'm reverting to type".

He's from a poor blue collar background and sometimes it seems like he really wants to stay in "the trailer park".

I have a bunch of activities planned for the weekend and now I think Saturday is probably shot as far as paddling goes. I don't want to be on the water with someone who is really hung over as my back up. We were also supposed to get dressed up a bit and go to dinner. I doubt that will happen either.

I keep mentioning that self-discipline starts with the self but he's not listening.

I think I know how the "discussion" he wants to have later today will go and it's one we've had so many times it's just a waste of time to have it again.

Sometimes I want to pack a bag and go to a motel for the weekend. I'd get about as much companionship there as I do with DH.

I'm going to try to not let him spoil the whole holiday for me. I spent a good amount of time planning meals, activities, etc. and I wish he'd participate.

It seems like I'm doing all the work in our relationship and he's doing nothing but whining about how bored he is with our life.

Got to get ready for Sat. morning errands.

Have a great weeeknd all!

Dagmar

[4rabbit]

Dagmar and good for you to keep having goos quality time for yourself!
Edited later: I just read last weeks thread and your phrase of "but I'm afraid of being alone" kind of stuck.I was absolutedly devastated when my XH left me for his "true love" after 24 yrs. But now, 5 years later, I am in a much better place emotionally. I'm still mad, but I'm finally getting through cleaning up the mess and I'm finding out that I am a much much more capable person then I thought. AND I have much more self esteem and more fun. For me, being alone was much better than being in a bad relation, and alone is not scary. I found out I am actually good company for myself.

I've been mia because I noticed I'd be on 3FC instead of working out. So..less 3FC and no early morning 3FC anymore..I have o get up and work out!

So far this has worked for me the past week:I did a workout 5 days out of 7, so that is OK.

Oh, and I'm patting myself hugely on the back for finally kicking myself to do a lot of much dreaded chores...this week credit moi for taking 2 catsa to the vet for their shots, for helping dd create a 50's outfit to go to a party even when I was very tired, for making an appointment with the gardening service for the yearly pruning, and, today, for getting 2 m3 of firewood and stacking it in my carport. AND not wrecking the car doing it.

Have a great weekend,
Rabbit

[JayEll]

Dagmar, Dagmar... Sigh...

He's not going to do what you want him to do. How many times have you seen that? It has nothing to do with whether you love him, or whether you're a good coach, or really, anything having to do with you. He is going to do exactly what he wants to do, and that will change from one day to the next.

On the days when he sounds all positive about eating right and exercising, you'll get your hopes up and make big plans--and then a few days later, he'll swing to the other side and go out drinking. Your hopes will be dashed. This has happened with great regularity for some time now, hasn't it?

For your own mental health, it would be good for you to disconnect from his ever-changing story and just do what you're going to do. Find some friends to do it with! Join a gym! How about the YMCA? Take up line dancing at the community center! You have just a ton of resources available in Toronto.

Don't include him in it, because then when he changes his mind you'll be sitting home angry again.

Does this make any sense to you?

Jay

[Mudpie]

Originally Posted by JayEll

Dagmar, Dagmar... Sigh...

He's not going to do what you want him to do. How many times have you seen that? It has nothing to do with whether you love him, or whether you're a good coach, or really, anything having to do with you. He is going to do exactly what he wants to do, and that will change from one day to the next.

On the days when he sounds all positive about eating right and exercising, you'll get your hopes up and make big plans--and then a few days later, he'll swing to the other side and go out drinking. Your hopes will be dashed. This has happened with great regularity for some time now, hasn't it?

For your own mental health, it would be good for you to disconnect from his ever-changing story and just do what you're going to do. Find some friends to do it with! Join a gym! How about the YMCA? Take up line dancing at the community center! You have just a ton of resources available in Toronto.

Don't include him in it, because then when he changes his mind you'll be sitting home angry again.

Does this make any sense to you?

Jay

I know. I am already doing a lot of stuff on my own. But the DH complains that we never do anything together and that we don't have anything in common any more.

He and I have to work on having a life together or end our relationship. We already both have separate lives and interests. We also have some common ground and that's what has to be cultivated if this is not going to end up as a separation.

We have many good times together too. I just don't post many of those because I tend to like to whine and be negative - my only fault .

I know DH, like myself, will only change when he sees he has to or lose some part of his life that he wants to keep. That or a majoy health incident will probably be when he gets on board with my (mostly) healthy lifestyle.

I just get tired/bored with waiting for it to happen sometimes and then I vent. For which I am very thankful that I have a place to come to do it.

Dagmar

[JayEll]

OK then! Thanks for the clarification on your situation. I'll now know to take it for what it's worth and not worry about you so much. Silly of me, really--you're a grown woman and can take care of yourself.

I hope you can work things out and stay on an even keel.

Jay