I had a hard time deciding where to post this - it is a combination Maintainers/Featherweights/Chicks in Control issue, I think!
In reviewing my food logs for the past month or so, a pattern is emerging. About once a week, I'm binging up to 139/140 lbs, then I spend the rest of the week getting back down to 133/135, then repeat. Every time, I tell myself that I am so close to goal, I can't give up, I have to just push through it this time, but I can never do it.
The thing is that, outside my binges and maybe the day after, I am hungry ALL THE TIME. Not mouth-hungry or boredom-hungry, but physically faint, lightheaded, starving, I-could-gnaw-my-arm-off hungry. This is on 1600-1700 calories / day, and they are GOOD calories. Lots of volume, lots of veggies, lean proteins, some good fats, 100% clean, NO junk.
This week, I was DETERMINED I was not going to binge. So much so that, the two days before I actually DID binge, I increased my calories to 2000/day (still 100% clean) just in an effort to stave it off, to do anything I could to just not feel hungry and NOT lose it this time. But even on 2000 calories/day, I was hungry (again, faint, starving, REAL hunger) all the time, & last night, it all finally snapped and I binged again, bringing me back up to 139 this morning.
I don't know what to do. I can't continue feeling hungry like this - it's so bad that it impacts my work productivity, and it triggers these awful binges. But I don't see how I can continue to lose while eating at the caloric level that my body apparently needs to NOT feel this way.
Is there anything I can do? Or is this just my body telling me that 130 is not, cannot really be, my goal weight?
You could try maintaining for a while (a month or two). This might relieve the mental pressure to lose, which could be causing the feelings of starvation.
If you decide you're happy at that size/weight, great. If you decide you'd rather lose the extra 5 or whatever pounds for good and go back into caloric deficit or kick up the workouts, that's great, too. Goals change -- and that's OK!
I am going through the exact same thing. My goal is 135, and I get down to 138-139, then binge up to 146, then lose it again week after week. No one believes it when I tell them! I want to be consistent so badly...I am REALLY trying! So I totally empathize with you.
Hypra - No, it's not TOM-related - it's about every 6-8 days, and has been happening for about a month.
Kaw - I don't think the feelings of starvation can possibly be just due to mental pressure to lose. I wake up hungry, and at night, I go to bed well before I'm truly tired because I'm so hungry that I turn to sleep just to shut it off. I frequently wake up in the night hungry.
PeatrixPotter - Sounds like you and I are going through the exact same thing. I am really trying, too - I want SO BADLY to be consistent and to reach my goal, and for the first 20 pounds and 3 months of this weight loss journey, I WAS - it's only during the past month or so that this has become a problem.
I hang out at 152-155, can eat like an angel and be at 152, have a binge and go up to 156 and then drop back into my range. I'm trying to figure it out. I go back and forth between being really annoyed about my binges, to wondering if I am requiring those calories physiologically (even though I take responsibility for them "my hand, my mouth"). My body fat % is quite low over all. I would like to be in the 140s, but I think my body likes this 152-155 business. My goal was to channel RockingRobin for a few weeks and be angelic re: food and I made it 5 days. Had a quesadilla and 2 small pieces of pizza last night and had so much energy when I ran this morning I couldn't even believe it. I think my body is at a set point whether I like it or not.
I read in Runners World that late afternoon/evening carb centered binges might be a result of not enough calories during the day....but I don't know if I am using that to justify some of my choices or whether it has validity for me personally.
I eat really well most of the time, paying attention to protein, veggies, fruit, healthy fats, and healthy carbs. Is it a plateau? Am I not trying hard enough? Is my body just happy here? What is magical about 140s for me? What is magical about 130 for you? What value do the numbers really have?
I do NOT have this figured out yet, but I wanted to let you know I am sharing your walk with you.
PS I know that kind of hunger you describe. Holy cow....
Su-Bee, since it's actual physical hunger, my vote is to immediately switch into maintenance mode. In my opinion, the binge issue is going to end up being far more destructive than a few extra pounds ever will be -- and may ultimately undo all your progress. So deal with the binges, get them tamed, maintain for a while, and then decide what you want to do. Your first priority really should be to stop the binges.
Your body is definitely telling you something, though it's hard to say exactly what. But since it's genuine hunger, it means your body is signaling you through hormones and other biochemical means to eat more. There are complicated reasons for this, such as set points, lowered metabolisms, and the effects of ghrelin and leptin and other hunger hormones. And I'm not a scientist or doctor, just avid reader, so really can't say for sure what's going on. But it seems like your body's alarm bells are going off and you need to stop, listen, and deal with it.
What if you gave yourself a few weeks and told yourself your only goal was 1. to maintain and 2. not binge? Don't change anything else, like the foods you're eating or your exercise. Just eat carefully and mindfully but enough so you don't fall into binge mode. And track your calories to see where you end up. See if you can stop the binges and the feelings of hunger that trigger them. And see if you can satisfy your hunger AND maintain. That's the million dollar question!
Whatever you do, please continue to post and let us know how you're doing. You've come way too far to let it slip away now. Binging is not an effective maintenance tool, so let's see if you can shake that pattern.
Thanks everyone! This is really helping me feel not so alone - I have been so upset over this. I even cried a little bit earlier today...
Jay - I have regularly exercised for years, even at my highest weights. An average exercise day for me is a 90-minute Bikram (hot) yoga class plus 30 minutes of cardio, normally elliptical or running. Occasionally I do 60 minutes of cardio and skip the yoga.
Glory - I've had blood work done recently, and it all seems to be good!
Midwife - I notice the same thing, as far as my workouts being the best ever the day after eating off-plan. I kind of figure it's the only time I'm not in a caloric deficit! As far as describing a binge - they are usually centered on a single (or a couple) high-calorie foods that happen to be available. Peanut butter (along with chocolate if it's available, although it's usually not, in my house) has been the culprit a couple of times. Cheese and crackers. Last night, it was wrap sandwiches and cookies left over from a work event, but more the sandwiches than the cookies. They aren't sweets-focused binges, although sweets can make their way in, as with the cookies. They aren't particularly carb-centred, either. As far as the feelings associated with the binges, although they ARE out of control, amount-wise, my primary feeling isn't so much of a loss of control as it is of my body going, "Oh, thank GOD!"
Meg - I think your advice is excellent. I think I need to try to give my body what it is demanding, on a daily basis, so as not to trigger binges. There is a part of me that thinks I should do this while continuing to track calories, & simply see where I land, but I am sort of afraid that if I track calories, I'll continue feeling like I "have to" or "should" stop at a certain number, and will maybe derail the whole thing. Another part of me says to do it while being aware of what I eat, but NOT tracking calories, so that I don't freak myself out over the numbers. I'll need to think about this part a little bit more...but I definitely do think that I need to stop the binge cycle, whatever it takes to do that!
Hi there! You already have the most experienced input on this board, but I just can't help myself!
I've read alot of success stories, and the ones who have reached their goal seem to have slowed at the last 10 lbs. They've kind of accepted it, and maintained their lifestyle comfortably -- upped calories, continued to eat healthily and well, continued their exercise programs. And pretty much all of them have found that after a few months of stabilized weight, the rest of it just kind of comes off on its own. Like your body says "Huh. OK. FINE." and kicks into gear. And once the person gives up the desire to control the amount and rate of weight loss and focuses on their healthy lifestyle, it just seems, well, RIGHT...
You've done SO well. Your BMI is healthy! Take the pressure off -- up the calories to maintain what you've lost. Keep up the exercise. Have a great summer. It is only a number.
JMHO,
Kira
I can't add much to the excellent advice already given.
However, I would ask WHEN are you eating? I have found that I HAVE to eat every 2 hours or so, regardless of how many calories I am eating. My body just functions better on a 6 meal a day schedule. Particularly with your level of exercise - it could be an issue.
So - follow Meg's advice, and maybe eat more often. See if that helps with the physical hunger.
For me, being hungry is simply not an option. If I'm hungry, I just can't function normally. There's no way on earth I'd be willing to walk around in that state. No number on the scale would be worth that *to me*. I therefore try to avoid that feeling before it strikes. So, I eat very frequently.
At this point, I would really work on trying to eliminate that hunger before it occurs. It's better to *spend* more calories now, then to restrict them, get too hungry and wind up spending more later. Kind of like an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. You will come out ahead this way if you would be staving off those binges.
I hope you get this figured out. I'm thinking you will.
Robin & CountingDown, I do already follow a "small, frequent meals" approach to eating. And Robin, I try to use a lot of your tricks for getting lots of food for few calories - salads the size of mixing bowls, whole heads of curried cauliflower, that sort of thing. With all that stuff, I'm hungry again not long after - I think that once it exits my stomach, my body immediately realizes that it was tricked & didn't actually get many calories!
I guess for now, my goal is going to be maintenance in the 135-139 range (I just DON'T want to go back to 140...!). That seems to be sort of where my body is trying to settle, so if I can give it more calories & still stay within that range, then maybe that is what I need to be doing for now.
Is my body telling me it's time to maintain?
