In class, my deskmate is Kurt, and we are very good friends. Friends to the point where we will, at times, act the part of boyfriend and girlfriend (the joking, bickering and flirting... not the hugging, kissing and sexing). Kurt also, once a month, endures the werewolf-esque beast that unleashes its soul through my body and comes out in the form of pain and hatred.

During one of my monthly *****fests, Kurt just stared at his computer, most likely attempting to ignore me. I stop talking, waiting for him to tell me that everything I'm saying is completely true.

"I'm sorry," he says with a straight face, "I can't hear you over your menstruation."

It was our motto until yesterday.

Ever since I've been losing weight, he refers to me as "your less massive self" which I try to take as a compliment without complaining. Yesterday (as the beast was coming out again) I finished a rant with a sigh that sounded a lot like a growl.

Kurt interpreted it out loud for me: "I'd eat your soul if I wasn't on a diet!"

It's our new motto.

ROFL!!! THat was too funny!