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KO 08-04-2008 09:40 PM

Can I come back? I had a lot of external things going on at the end of july that made life flooeey at best. I'm back on plan with eating (SBD Hi Cyn) and exercise I'm determined to work the program!

BillBlueEyes 08-05-2008 05:07 AM

Tuesday
 
Diet Coaches – A contractor had a contractor-type reasons for not showing up yesterday. The painter who is doing some minor touch up work on the trim said, with a straight face, "The weather will be better tomorrow." Wonder if they go to school to learn how to construe such logic. I, of course, heard, "A more costly job was available, but I'm otherwise bored tomorrow so might drop by." Was a simple day for me. Went to the farmers' market during lunch hour. Bought lettuce and heirloom tomatoes. CREDIT moi. Focusing on fresh foods helps me to see the rather mediocre foods that I overate to gain my weight as simply not my thing anymore.

Jean (kuhljeanie) - WOW. Kudos for staying on plan in so many situations in one weekend. Good for me to hear your story of doing your long run despite "busy, hot, and muggy." Big Kudos for eating on plan at the Ohio state fair - a fair brings up so many childhood memories that adult behavior is difficult for me. Nevertheless, not sure that you get full Kudos for turning down the fried Snickers bar. Do they remove the wrapper first?, LOL. Read your sentence, "my hope is that once we've crossed this bridge, things will really and truly settle down." hmmmm... OK... Just wondering if the YES word is contributing here, LOL.

onebyone – Ouch, Ouch, Ouch, and Ouch. Kudos for recognizing that you have a gaggle of emotional issues flocking about in your one brain simultaneously; hard to sort out. Sounds like one negative thought was able to hunt around and flare up all potential negative thoughts. A lot to deal with at once. Methinks Beck would, rather cold heartedly, suggest start with NO CHOICE and then deal with the alligators - closest one first. My take would be to take that foot with you to your session with Nadine. She sounds like she has the skills to lead you through a reduced workout without stressing that foot. And you'd get that powerful feedback of demonstrating your unusual body flexibility. It's awful to face negative thoughts about such major life decisions like earning your living as an artist. Apparently every artist (except Picasso and Dali) faces that one. Don't cut off your ear, use your Beck strategies for staying on plan, keep talking this through, make decisions for today. Sending supportive thoughts for a difficult time.

Robin (RobinW) - Yay for having your gardens back. Poof to my image of Lucy and the football, LOL.

Kierie (KO) - Yay that no longer is "life flooeey at best." "Flooeey" ranks right up there with RobinW's "wonky" for conveys-the-message words. Kudos for being on plan with eating and exercise. Yep, you're always welcome here.

shrinkin - Just love it that you are executing the "Sue Antoinette approach to menu planning and having good food choices available." I'm picking up stuff for dinner tonight for a family gathering, and think I'll follow your lead - they don't need stacks of cheeses and crackers just because I think that they'll think that I should have brought them. Thanks for that. Kudos for your clarity in reviewing your weekend.

M (goodnuff) – Ouch for your daughter's sprained ankle. And Ouch for losing your walk to the beach. Hope you found a way to get that walk.

CyndiM – Kudos for giving yourself credit and Kudos for focusing on the stuff that you observe about your own eating style. Glad to know that I'm not alone in the too-much-fruit department. I hear you that being drawn to overeat healthy food is still overeating.


Readers – "… By the end of six weeks, you’ll have learned everything you need to continue losing weight and to be on your way to keeping it off – permanently. " Beck, pg 24.

onebyone 08-05-2008 07:28 AM

Hello on this overcast Tuesday
 
Good Morning Coaches

I'm getting ready to catch the bus to the gym. My appt is at 9am with Nadine the trainer. I will be there and do whatever she says. My foot feels good this morning. had it iced and resting all night. Went to bed early.
I am about to eat my light breakfast and go. Will report back when I am done. I'm skipping going into the school today. It's movie day this afternoon and I have two orders to begin work on so the ceramic room can wait a day.

And the result of my binge yesterday is seeing the scale come in at 263 this morning. Salt salt salt.

Gotta go.

shrinkin 08-05-2008 07:40 AM

Tuesday morning! Got to be better today!
 
Good morning coaches!

A fine day yesterday until afer dinner...food desire back, trolling back, eating while bored and tired back. :(...Yikes, over calories again by about 200. I have to give myself credit for recording my food and for the most part, healthy choices....BUT I have to get myself back on track starting this very minute. I will have a full OP day today. Need to read my ARC...out of the habit over the weekend. Got to say NO CHOICE to food desire.

Today is exercise day...to the pool without excuse. No ifs, ands or buts.

Today is Day 27: Master the Seven Questions Technique. This looks like an important lesson and one that is going to take a while. I could have stayed another day on Day 26:Recognizing Thinking Mistakes, but decided to bookmark it and move on with a plan to reread it many times in the future.

BBE-Guess those contractors think they (like the weather forecasters) can fool us! LOL! Credit for your "easy day". Wonder if I will get to the point that I view making good choices as EASY? Sure hope so.

KO-Welcome back! I am a newbie in the interim. Kudos for getting your program back together. How long have you been doing Beck?

CyndiM-Greetings! Kudos for working on the focus while eating, eating slow and not standing. I believe each of these are important and easily overlooked. It is easy for me to rationalize overeating if I am making healthy choices. Thanks for pointing out that sabotaging thought!

onebyone-Whoa! There are so many thoughts racing around in your post. It would be easy to be overwhelmed. It is hard for me to respond because we are all different, but if it were me would start by giving myself some big credits for dealing with the issues head on. And credit for stopping the binge! You know you are not going to let the foot keep you from your trainer appointment. Your foot will make your training slower going than you had hoped/planned but whatever you do will be better than doing nothing. Little steps count! I know you, like me, are fairly early in the Beck program. But, she does have a day for Emotional Eating (day 33). It might help to read that now...not skipping whatever day you are on today, but just adding it to your read today. You can always reread it when you get to Day 33. Hope both of our days are better today! Hang in there!

I think I responded to everyone else in my late post yesterday. Happy Tuesday to all coaches and readers!

kuhljeanie 08-05-2008 10:01 AM

tuesday everyone!

onebyone, i'm right there. a whole bunch of yuck coming up at the same time and feeding on itself. it's about leaving my beloved old house for a yicky one in dayton that needs a ton of work, my overwhelmed DH having trouble with sleeping and his stomach, sorting through some tricky finances, figuring out how to get the old house leased, and the ticking of my biological clock. and having two huge cake orders coming up in the next three weeks. i just realized this morning that i need to start making arrangements to close out my accounts with my ISP and cable, etc. change of address. we're selling a ton of stuff on eBay and i inadvertently listed something that was supposed to be local pickup only as free shipping. so we're losing money sending these stupid plastic chairs to utah. aaaargggh! I WANT CHOCOLATE!!! I WANT CHOCOLATE!

i know chocolate ain't gonna make any of it go away, though. which sucks. option B is to hide under the covers, which also isn't going to help it much. what i really need to do is put together a prioritized list and just start knocking it out, one foot in front of the other. i know i can do it. if i can run 13 miles in a row, i can do this. it may not be pleasant but i'll get through it and i'm pretty sure i'll feel much better when it's over. one thing i do know is that overeating on a bunch of crap won't help. so as loud as that voice is screaming at me to go to the cafeteria and pick up some doughnuts, i won't.

thanks everyone for listening...i feel a little better. onebyone, don't sweat the water gain. in the long run it matters not one hill of beans. the thing that matters is that you're on your way to train and you're going to feel so much better afterwards! i'm already thinking about my workout planned for this afternoon and how much better i'll feel afterwards. if i didn't have a lunch meeting, i'd run off right now.

onebyone 08-05-2008 06:05 PM

Tuesday Afternoon
 
Afternoon coaches

I went to the gym. Did my workout. 10 exercises. All are challenging. I don't understand why it was so daunting, now that it's over of course. It's very obvious that I will sabotage myself if I focus on weightloss. I plainly cannot envision myself losing weight. I can't. BUT I can see myself doing this workout, focusing on getting the workouts in, getting up to the recommended reps, or more. Lots to strive for there. I can see myself not needing BP pills anymore, being healthier, more fit. I just want my body to do whatever it needs to naturally, just let the goal number go, the goal size go, just not focus there. And if I want to seriously begin this process I will have to look at the food and the behaviour around the food. I don't have to be perfect, I just have to do it.

kuhljeanie Whoa... you are really busy! Thanks for the thoughts. I have the same thought telling me to get doughnuts. I haven't done it. It's been with me for two days and I still hear it. ;P phhhht donut thought!
Hope you worked out. It does feel good.

shrinkin Thanks for your response to my post this morning. Since I got home my thinking seems to be much clearer. Must have been the workout and seeing myself actually do it. It feels good to have followed through. And though it may not seem so at times, I have worked through the book. I am now looking for the book again, so I am always glad to be reminded of what dr. beck has written about. It reminds me of why I need to find that book!
Thanks.

BillBlueEyes Such sanity. I have to thank you for your ever thoughtful responses. Things do look better now. I think fear just grips me sometimes and it skews every outlook in every direction at times...course being exhausted and working 6-7 days a week is not conducive to taking time and thinking things through and good decision making. It's why we have books to read and reflect on, and places to write posts, and friends to listen and respond. All perfect attributes of this Beck forum. Thanks. I will figure it out.

shrinkin 08-05-2008 07:00 PM

Experienced Beckies?
 
Onebyone-Sorry about my suggestion to you about adding to your daily read when you have already done it once...or maybe more? :?: Chalk it up to my being a newbie! ;)

From some post earlier this month, I got the impression that only CoastalSue, BBE and QuilterInVA were long time Beckies. Would be interesting to know how long each of the Coaches have been doing Beck. ??

freer 08-05-2008 07:25 PM

Hi All,

Just a quick hello. The scale has not been moving much lately. I'm working on identifying the sabotaging thoughts. Credit: ME.

shrinkin, good question about the coaches! I've just been doing Beck for less than a month.

BillBlueEyes 08-06-2008 06:22 AM

Wednesday
 
Diet Coaches – Tried the Sue-Antoinette style of entertaining when I brought the food for a family gathering (thanks Whole Foods): red peppers and hummus, cheese and crackers, two types of cold salmon plus five types of roasted vegetables, huge mixed green salad from the farmer's market with edible flowers, white beans and tomatoes with rosemary vinaigrette that I made, and watermelon. All the red peppers were gobbled up, including by the kids, and the food was admired and enjoyed. Even I ate wisely from the spread. CREDIT moi. Thanks Sue (CoastalSue) and shrinkin for showing me that it could be done and that I didn't have to add all the stuff that I thought they would think I should have brought.

Jean (kuhljeanie) - Ouch that moving means canceling your Internet connections; kinda awful thought that you might be in limbo for a period - however brief. One idea: Sprint has an "everywhere" service that works with a gadget stuck in your laptop's USB port (essentially a cell phone/modem). They have a 30 day free trial period (so I'm told). I tried it out when a relative was in their trial period; works great. Kudos for standing down the desire for "CHOCOLATE!!!"

onebyone – Big Kudos for facing down fear and going to your gym session with your trainer. Yay that it worked out so well. Thanks for the demo showing that we can't stop fear, but we can still go forward.

shrinkin - Ouch for "bored and tired." they can be deadly. Look forward to hearing how you do with day 27: Master the Seven Questions Technique. That seems so much like the core technique, yet I've only used it once. Even though it helped, I haven't used it again. Can you think of a way that we can use each other to help work through that technique? I feel like I'm ignoring something potentially useful. Not surprised that you plan to revisit Thinking Mistakes. I do keep using that one, both for my eating and exercising as well as stuff outside of Beck.

freer - Kudos for working on Sabotaging Thoughts. It always surprises me how they slip in under my radar and I have to go ferret them out.

Readers – "You’ll probably find that dieting and weight loss follow a predictable cycle: During the first week or two, you might find that dieting is relatively easy. ... " Beck, pg 24.

shrinkin 08-06-2008 07:36 AM

Wednesday report
 
Good morning coaches!

Well, an almost OP day yesterday...but not what you might think. Only got in 900 calories yesterday (target range is 1000-1400). I was very good all day saving 200 calories for snack after dinner. Went to swim after dinner and sooo not hungry plus tired, I skipped eating. Old me might have indulged in something really tasty even though tired thinking I "deserved it"and had calories left. Water intake on plan.

Had very good pool workout with at least first 20 min straight aerobic, but surprisingly challenging considering how long I have been doing this....4 weeks tomorrow. Body sore this am. Just looked back at my record. 18 exercise sessions in the past 4 weeks. Who woulda thought that I could pull that off? Credit MOI. Someone said to me last month (actually several of you great coaches have said this)...one day at a time. Those exercise sessions certainly accrued with "one day at a time" thinking. Tomorrow is weigh in and that igetting ready is Day 28 task. I expect the scale to be same or slightly up....have to get the brain ready for that. I will pull out that nonscale goal tomorrow.

Just learned we are lilkely to have house guests this weekend (friends coming to deal with an extended family member's serious illness), so we will be hospitable. I was looking forward to catching up on some life chores and shopping....but will just have to wait. Sue Antoinette will be called upon again. Also are going to a neighbors party this weekend. BIG CHALLENGE for me there. Have to get mentally ready.

BBE-Interesting that you have not used the Seven Questions method, but you have gotten very good at mastering sabotaging thouughts which is one point of the exercise. Her other point is that when you are "under the gun" with a thought and can't come up with a reasoned approach, you fall back on the short commands, like NO CHOICE. Methinks you have that one down pretty well too.

I did not get very far with the seven question work yesterday. For one thing, I have not been recording my sabotaging thougts in writing. So, I will need to either go back thru 3FC posts or write those for a few days to really do the exercise. [Should not take too long to acquire these as poor thinking happens often]. Maybe we can put a couple up on the board...or one a day and then, we could use the seven questions independently and share some responses. QuilterInVA mentioned that she has mastered this and uses it....wish she were on the board to share with us. I know she has some health issues. QuilterInVA...are you out there? Anyone else use this method?? Other thoughts on this?

freer-agree with the challenge of sabotaging thoughts. Not sure what day you are on...but if we start this work on the seven questions (day 27), hope you will join in the fun.

kuhljeanie-Kudos for resisting that choclate urge. Your resistance muscle is flexing! Moving is SOOO stressful and doubly so when you are leaving a place you love for one needing work. I have moved cross country 5 or 6 times in past 20 years. You are right about the list making. When I hit the panic feeling, the lists come out. ...mine and one for DH. Also, drop off the list things that really dont have to happen right away...limits the panic. Cut yourself some slack for not doing list items perfectly. It will be over soon...and you can do it!:carrot:

onebyone-kudos on focusing on that workout. Getting lined up with a trainer is huge...and you have done it!

Great Wednesday to everyone!

onebyone 08-06-2008 07:50 AM

Good Wednesday Morning Coaches
 
Hi.

Just finished my reasonable breakfast and am getting ready to leave for work at the school. Hope to be back home by 1 or so. Much to do going into the 2nd of 3 art shows this Saturday (rain day: Sunday). Have to get and stay organized and focused.

Feeling good today. Hopeful. It's always worth it to face your fear and do it, even if I am a mess leading up to the event. Hoping to have a reasonable food day today and to begin to map out a foodplan for myself this evening, taking into account the things Nadine wants me to do ie. always have a small amount of protein with everything I eat.

BillBlueEyes Sounds like your gathering was really successful! You never know what people will love eh? Imagine kids and red peppers! Without trying it, you'd never have known. Yay for being brave and trying something new!

freer Hang in there. The scale will move in the right direction if you don't undo your good work due to frustration! Sabotaging thoughts are a key to why we don't stay on plan long enough to get the good stuff. All the best!

shrinkin No biggie about assuming I am a newbie. I started in February, finished the book in April, started backsliding when the first bout of work stress flared up in late April. I've been dealing with weight issues for decades. I suspect it'll take a few go-rounds with Beck strategies before they get as ingrained in me as all my bad habits and thoughts. The important thing is to keep circling back when you find you are off track. Each time round a bit more sticks and becomes habit. At least that's my experience.

BTW there are archives of this group that are easily accessible in the first post of the month. If you check out the past month's posts you'll see who's been around and for how long... it's good reading too. I may go back and read some myself.

Have a good Wednesday coaches!

kuhljeanie 08-06-2008 01:41 PM

movin' blues
 
happy wednesday, coaches! not much new going on...got through a fair amount of my list last night, and am really grateful to the internet for making it easier to change my address with all the various vendors and suppliers who make my lifestyle possible. ;) just to clarify, bill - i'm just cancelling the ISP at the house where we won't be living. DH is upgrading from dial-up to broadband at the dayton house, and i'll still have it at work (which is mainly when i post anyway - :s:) was feeling generally overwhelmed yesterday, and when i didn't give in to the chocolate fiend i sort of sat with myself for a little bit. realized i need to honor the fact that i'm feeling some sadness leaving a house i've loved very much - and behind it there's some grief for closing out a time in my life that's not been reality for a while. when i bought it, i lived in it with a childhood girlfriend who was recouping from a divorce, and we had SO MUCH fun doing our single girl thing together. she's remarried since, and i also found my man and had a baby, and the house and neighborhood doesn't work anymore. i love my family to bits, but that doesn't mean i'm not sad about it too. i talked to dh about it last night. he's amazingly sweet - told me we didn't have to move if i don't want to. aw! :hug: we do have to, and i want to. it's better for everyone involved. i just wasn't prepared for a tough time letting go of the part of my life that this house represents, even though it's been over for a long time. funny, huh? i wonder if i would have gotten there (and had a really good talk with dh as a result) if i'd gone with my first inclination, which was to drown my discomfort in chocolate and bread. i'm guessing a no on that. chalk up another win in the name of the good doctor. :)

thanks everyone for the support! it's so easy for me to forget that i don't have to do everything perfectly, right this minute. i don't have a tenant lined up yet, so it's not like we've got a "real" deadline on clearing and cleaning everything up. i needed the reminder, shrinkin! i like the idea of re-reading the old posts. i've been around for a while too now (since late january) and it'd probably be interesting to see where i was when i started. i do remember that my first post was on day 12 - i was sick to my stomach with hunger and wanted to make sure i was doing it "right." yep, that's me all over. :) bill, wonderful report back on your menu. just a great reminder that we can change the tenor of the conversation we have with ourselves over what we really need to do versus what we perceive as others' expectations. shrinkin, enjoy invoking sue antoinette! i like that! onebyone, absolutely thrilled to hear that the workout was not nearly as bad as you were thinking it would be. makes it that much easier to stick with! i'm starting to understand that exercise makes me feel better than overeating. (gasp.) it sounds so simple - but it's like i'm finally REALLY getting it. when i'm feeling sad or stressed, my first impulse is shifting to wanting to exercise instead of eat, because one makes me feel better, and the other makes me feel worse, and keeps me stuck. i'm not 100% there yet, but it seems absolutely likely given the path i'm currently on that it's just a matter of time until i get there. even more amazing that my current stress seems to be supporting my CBT work and vice versa, instead of being an excuse to overeat, like it used to be.

welcome back KO!

back to it...the gym is calling and i have a massage tonight. really needing it these days!

p.s. weighed myself again today, and i'm still down those two pounds. one more day and i'll shift my signature line. wheeee!

goodnuff 08-06-2008 02:09 PM

Good Afternoon!

Well I went through my reasons to lose weight that I made in the spring, added a few more and posted them. I have one copy on my bathroom mirror and one next to my seat on the couch with little reminders on the tv to turn it off and read my reasons. I'm a bigger couch postato than I'd like to admit.

I made a revised version of my reasons for my locker at work. No one at work needs to know the nityy gritty details of my being overweight. I do worry about the ones I have at home being read by my visitors or my daughters' friends, but than i also think maybe it will prevent someone else from over-eating and being a couch potato.:s:

We ended up going to the dog park the other day and my friend and I walked down to the creek to let our dogs swim. It's a pretty good size hill to get there and going up was no fun. Kudos to me because I knew it was there, dreaded it but did it anyway!

Who is this Sue Antoinette you talk about? I'm sure if I went far enough back in the posts I'd figure it out.

Off to pick up my BP meds, yet another motivation to keep on reading and doing.

M

freer 08-06-2008 04:57 PM

Good day All,

Well when Beck said we should celebrate each 1/2 pound loss, I now really understand what she means. After going up and down for days, I finally hit a new low by 1/2 pound. :carrot: Sheesh! I am choosing to look at it this way. It is good to flex my frustration muscle and still see that I need to stay on plan even if the scale isn't moving. A 1/2 pound reward like today could be just around the corner. Credit: Me for not giving in to those sabotaging thoughts because they definitely were there.

I too would be interested in a practice of the seven question technique. I'm not really doing Beck day by day, as I've been listening to the audio book. I go back to the parts that hold meaning as I get confronted with them.

Some friends invited me to lunch at the last minute and before saying I was going to go, I told them I had to check something and I'd call them back. I really needed the social interaction so I went to the restaurant's website to look at their menu. After seeing some good food options I accepted their invitation.

I was able to find a nice light lunch option (1/2 turkey sandwich and a cup of tortilla soup) so that I knew what I was going to get ahead of time. It worked out GREAT. It was a very interesting experience to not OVEReat at a restaurant. Is this how thin people do this???? Very interesting! I need more experiences like this. Credit: Me.

goodnuff Good job on setting yourself up for success by putting those notes everywhere.

Have a great day, everyone.

BillBlueEyes 08-07-2008 06:34 AM

Thursday
 
Diet Coaches – Did my weekly attack on paper work clutter. Another bin of paper to be recycled. CREDIT moi. Went to the gym later than usual and hit the peak after work crowd; had to find a cramped little space behind a piece of construction equipment to do my squats and sit ups. Kinda encouraging to see so many people working out - just as well they wouldn't do it in the real estate that I wished to use, LOL.

Jean (kuhljeanie) - Ouch for the sad feelings over leaving the old house. All changes are a loss, and all losses must be grieved right through the documented five stages of grief - which are tough and painful. Sorry that it's hurting at the moment while you work through it. Kudos for confronting the issues by conversation with you DH. And thanks for the focus, "we can change the tenor of the conversation we have with ourselves over what we really need to do versus what we perceive as others' expectations" - I needed to hear that.

onebyone – Yay for "Hopeful" - a happy sounding feeling for a person with a busy agenda preparing for the art shows this weekend. Good luck.

shrinkin - Congrats that today marks 4 weeks into your journey. Kudos for 18 exercise sessions in that span. Re: "900 calories" - hmmm... just checking that you're in accord with your dietitian or doctor on eating that low; the common belief around here is that 1200 calories is the minimum required for a days nutrition. Sending positive thoughts for your "BIG CHALLENGE" neighbors party this weekend.

freer - Congrats on the 1/2 pound. Kudos for your rapid re-planning so that you could accept the invitation to lunch. Spontaneity was recently discussed here, and you just demonstrated a great way to be spontaneous and stay on plan.

M (goodnuff) – Kudos for climbing the hill and double Kudos for planning the walk when you knew the hill was there. "Sue Antoinette" is Sue (CoastalSue) as recognized after her stellar demonstration of how to hostess while remaining on plan, per:
Quote:

Originally Posted by coastalsue (Post 2288556)
Was able to remain on program during our dinner- made a very good low fat meat, multi veggies meal- no butter, no bread, no dessert- yet the guests were very gracious and positive-In the past I felt I "had" to include all those high carb things to be a good hostess-then I would be so tempted and would overindulge in them. Big step for me to go from "let them eat cake" to "let them eat veggies".

Quote:

Originally Posted by BillBlueEyes (Post 2289157)
Sue (CoastalSue) - Gotta love the new Sue Antoinette, "let them eat veggies!"


Readers – "… Then things likely become somewhat more difficult. ... " Beck, pg 24.


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