....DIETing, that is

I have been struggling with losing 20 lbs. for goodness knows how long. For so many years I would restrict my calories too much, like to 700 a day, and then always end up binging. I would cut out whole groups of foods I really enjoyed just to end up pigging out on them, and it made me feel terrible. I tried the raw foods diet, Atkins (lasted about 3 days on that one, LOL) and whatever else.... Through all this I never gained but I never lost either. Also, I would push myself too hard to exercise-- I would say, OK, i HAVE to run 5 miles EVERYDAY, and no one can keep up a schedule like that with a full time job-- plus I saw it as a necesarry evil type thing, because I really don't enjoy long distance running.

So my new plan is all about MODERATION. I figure if I had started a plan like this which is easier to stick to a couple of years ago, the weight would be long gone in a healthy way and I could have saved myself a lot of heartache! My new plan involves sticking to about 1200 calories a day, exercising (walking, biking, weights and even running IF I FEEL LIKE IT), but doing it CONSISTENTLY. I'm going to break up the meals smaller, because if I let myself get too hungry I tend to overeat. Oh and as much as I hate to, I need to cut back on the weekend wine and beer. But I'm still going to enjoy it every once in a while.

So I could use some support.... this is the first time I'm doing it RIGHT but it's scary!!!

I REALLY FEEL YOUR FRUSTRATION! I have a similar situation. I have constantly struggled to maintain/lose weight. I have done the exact same things you have done with either minimal, none or short term success. Last summer I was on a very low calorie diet monitored by a doctor so I could lose 10 pounds to get in my wedding dress...well it work I was down to 125 pounds my goal weight.. I must have literally stayed that weight for maybe 2 days...you know the rest. I am now up to 140 and am thoroughly disgusted! I'm trying the moderation thing as well but I get so disappointed with no scale change. Sometimes I avoid the scale all together because if it has not changed or heaven forbid gone in the wrong direction I get so depressed and discouraged. SO, I could use some support as well and we seem to have similar goals so I would really like to have some one to share with...

Hope to hear from you soon!

I am so with you. This is my first post here, but I am so sick of dieting also. I can't enjoy anything, then I feel so guilty and crappy when I do eat something I shouldn't. It is so hard with working and 3 kids, baseball, and everything else to stick to a strict diet plan. Last spring I did the 6WBMO and lost about 17 pounds (165 to 147). At 147 I was a large size 10, bought new clothes. Within 3 months of going off, I gained it all back. I have been trying everything since November to just lose 10-15 pounds and nothing works. Right now I am doing a protein diet from Klik Nutrition, and I will finish it since I paid for it, but I think it was a rip off. I also think my body has adjusted to my work outs, so I am going to find some fun things to do with my kids - like rollerskating one night and bike riding another, but still do toning band workouts. My husband says he is tired of seeing me punish myself and not enjoy anything - like BBQs, having a beer or two, or anything else. I think he is right. I'm 36 in July and life sucks. I want to live again.

I would love to be your buddy!!!

I think you hit the same phonepole I did! lol! I mean I havent gone through the dieting, but you have a similar plan to mine.

I'm so glad to see other people doing everything in moderation. I'm trying to recover from bulimia myself and eat/exercise in moderation. I still struggle with restriction of food and over-exertion on exercise. Sometimes, I barely hit 300 calories a day, others, I binge bigtime and end up paying for it because my stomach will feel like it's going to explode because of all the crap I ate Case in point, 2 nights ago. I wouldn't wish that kind of stomach pain on anybody, I couldn't even get to sleep I over-exert myself sometimes still with exercise because once I started, but it balances out because on the weekends, I'm usually driving all over Texas and can't workout. I wish you guys luck on this!

Your husband and my husband should talk! He is sooo tired of seeing me get up early every morning to go to the basement to work my butt off and follow a eating plan to only be sad and disappointed with little or no weigtht loss. I sometimes feel like my life is only worrying about what I put in my mouth and will the scale be "friendly" the next morning. I'm sick of it. I know that whole "muscle weighs more than fat" but I would still like to see some movement on that scale...and not in the wrong directions. I'm 35 with no kids and feel like if it is this hard without every being pregnant and having kids, than forget it! I'm doing the BFL for women and I'm trying to be patient and not so hard on my self and hopefully I will see some improvements. I'm trying to mentally prepare myself for the slow, constant thing instead of the the quick, short lived results...I can use all the buddies I can get.. Hope to hear from you soon.

Leshia

Our husbands should talk. My hubby needs to lose weight, but his whole family is overweight and really have stomachs. He looks ok, not great, but ok, but hey - he is having a beer, eating a hamberger and enjoying life, while I sit around mourning that I can't go out for breakfast or then I do and feel like crap all day and refuse to eat. I have 3 kids (2, 12, 15) and it is hard to diet and to find time to exercise. I try to exercise when I get home from work, but that involves sticking the 2 year old in front of the tv for an hour while i do it, but I am thinking of trying something else more fun. I have my old rollerskates and may try that. Maybe in the evenings when it cools off. I want to lose my stomach. It won't go away.

Why do women obscess about weight and men just go thru life? I wish I knew. I hate to think what I am teaching my teenager.

So much complaining. Purhaps everyone needs something to make them happy. There has to be something out there that can brighten up this situation. Dieting shouldnt make you sad. Its not that your doing it justf or the weight loss... Its suppsed to be reinventing the way you live. I can guarentee you will be much more successfull if you try and keep your chin up. If its that sad, what your doing that is, then maybe you should look into other ways. You will never be able to keep your diet if your upset about it.

I know what you mean...my husband could stand to lose at least 20 pounds but he is not miserable..he will look at his stomach at night and poke it out and make fun of it! He MAY work out 1-2 times a week and LOOSELY follows Atkins, but he not a fanatic about it. Sometimes I'm so jealous of him..he can work out one day,eat well for a couple of days and lose 3-5 pounds! I have demanded he no longer tells me of these "great scale days" he has. I just want to be happy with my body...I never use to have a belly problem and now It just won't go away. I do understand your concern for what you are teaching your teenager, if we as grown women are so hard on ourselves, I don't want to imagine what teenagers go through with all the pressure to be thin.. I have rollerblades and a bike..maybe you and I can agree to get outside and have some fun at least a few nights a week.. what do you think?

Leshia

your right! I guess I want the impossible...I want to know that If I stick to moderatation, I will get results...eventually...the problem is the eventually...I get discouraged quickly if I don't see results in the time frame I feel...But talking about it does help...I have to believe that If I am consistent I will see results, no matter how small they seem they do add up... Thanks

Leshia

It's the waiting that kills me - to get results, that is. Our society has gotten us to expect nothing less than instant gratification in so many areas, including our bodies. I know it took time for me to get here but I want it to take a lot less time to get where I want it to be.

Let's do the fun exercise thing. Tonight I will try something fun. Tomorrow night is out as we have ballgames, but I can do Friday night too and maybe find some time on Saturday and Sunday. I hate to work out on weekend. The week of the 6th we are on vacation and I want to have some fun, grill out at the lake and eat ice cream!

I think we need to start by incorporating some fun in our moderation plan. We can do this. I signed up at Fitday and have logged in breakfast and lunch for today. I will do my dinner tonight. I use protein shakes for meal replacements too. They fill me up and are pretty healthy, as long as I don't start craving stuff. It's hard now that school is out. THere are snacks lurking in my kitchen for the kids.

Are you a veggie person? I'm not but I do lettuce and green beans. I am thinking of trying cucumbers, but would prefer a pickle. I need to buy some strawberries and make a smoothie. Something healthy is 2 egg whites, some crystal light, water and some berries. Great tasting (learned this on the 6WBMO).

Feel free to IM me if you want or email me direct too. I work all day but I have my IM on also.

Thats where I came from. I wanted the results, and i just didnt wanna wait. Well, I finally realised that was silly, and that I just needed to do it. It was no longer a "I need to look good in a bathing suit" for summer, it became more of a life problem--specially since i cannot afford the cloths (haha). Honestly, I dont care how long it takes me now, Im just so glad ive finally focused myself on a better lifestyle. When I have children (hopefully soon ) I want them to admire the way i live, and extend that to them. I love videogames, and I love the computer.... but thats not a healthy lifestyle...so I just had to make some adjustments. I think I am happier now too I dont care that Im over weight, but I do care that im healthy. Actually I was very happy when I was rushed to the hospitol the other day (not because of the reason why i was rused) because when the nurse took m bloodpressure, she said it was EXCELLENT, she said it was the best anyone could have. It made me so happy, the pain almost went away (Fiancee closed the car door on myhand). ^_^ Just keep in mind that sunny days are ahead.

there is NO reason to punish yourself (at least not much, a little punishing goes a long way though). I was still able to roast some marshmellows on the fire this weekend, and stay on my diet It was well worth it too ... MODERATION is the key. Think of Tai Chi and the Yin Yang, you need BALANCE... balance the good with the evil. Good cannot exist without evil and vice versa... this is why we see binging after trying to NOT intake the certain types of food. So...theres two things to keep in mind then, BALANCE and MODERATION

Thanks for the inspiration. The thing is, I know all this, I just want faster results. My doctors say I am totally healthy and don't know why I can't lose weight and they told me to just be healthy and not worry about it. I guess I am just obsessed with it and its become a habit that I need to break. STARTING TODAY.

I am going to log what I eat and try to eat well and be positive so that maybe by my vacation next week I can eat what I want and not feel guilty!

Wow, all these great replies!! I totally hear you guys on the not seeing results fast thing. It is so frustrating. But it is MORE frustrating to try to stick to an impossible plan and fail time and time again. It is MORE frustrating to deny ourselves a couple little bites of something we really like at a barbecue!! So let's stick together and have FUN losing weight this summer girls!

I know what you mean...I'm all for the fun excercise thing...I can't tonight, but I can definitley do tomorrow night. I either rollerblade or ride the bike. I use protein shakes and bars as well! I do like some veggies, I like to stir fry chopped zucchini, squash and onions with some Ms. Dash and serve over a little of brown rice.. It tastes really good..But alot of people don't like 2 out of 3 of those vegetables As far as the cucumber, you may want to try slicing a cucumber and putting some vinegar, salt and pepper in a sealer bag with the cucumber slices and let them soak for a while and then eat them...It's kinda the same tart and crisp affect of a pickle with out too much sodium. I will have to try the smoothie trick this weekend! I will email you directly and feel free to email me directly as well..I need more info on this "Fitday" you wrote about.

Leshia