Hi,
I used to be a pretty active person but my health took a turn for the worse and I spent a few years dealing with some major health issues. During that time I was on medication that caused weight gain, I was also very depressed because of the illness and the death of my daughter and I am sure that added to my weight gain as well. Now I am 100 lbs overweight and I feel pretty hopeless that I will ever see 120 again. I have started eating healthy and staying pretty low on the calories- mostly eat fruits and veggies. My real problem is exercise. I am so out of shape that even going to the gym is embarrassing. I spend 20-30 minutes there and I am struggling to maintain the speed of a turtle. It makes me feel like I will never achieve my goal when I can barely walk a 30 min mile. I know I have to start somewhere but before all the health issues I was able to run a 7 min mile. I feel like that is an impossible goal now. How do you stay motivated when you feel so defeated?

oh honey. I feel for you. it's SOOO hard when you can only see that you can't do what you once did.

Before I launch into a few ideas about exercise, I'd like to suggest that you make sure you're getting enough protein. Your muscles need it.

Now, what I'm about to tell you comes from the perspective of being BEDRIDDEN and having to learn how to walk again. I used to walk MILES in NYC - at least 3 miles RT to and from the PATH or Port Authority, and at least a couple of miles at lunch. it was fun! I also hiked for hours with the dogs.

and then, I was bedridden and weighed more than 500 pounds. Not overnight, though. Once out of the hospital and moving again, i literally counted steps. 40 steps down the driveway, 40 steps back. sit on the front stoop, repeat. then take a 2-hour nap. and added a few steps every day or two. before long, i was walking around the block. then 1/2 mile. then a mile.

and then hiking again.

you don't have to go to the gym, especially if it makes you sad. do what you can NOW, and then do just a little more. Deal with this one day at a time, literally one step at a time.

you will NEVER know where you'll end up if you don't start. Who knows? you might actually run a 6.5-minute mile! i ended up doing a 5 K [walking!!! these old lady knees don't run!]

Awww hun. If it makes you feel better, the first time I tried to use my elliptical I literally couldn't go, on the easiest setting, for more than 2 1/2 minutes. I was embarrassed beyond belief. I thought my heart was going to explode. I kept trying. Sometimes I had to do 3 minutes 4 times day to get me up to 12 minutes. Just keep trying. Do what you can until you are ready to try more. Don't give up. It took me months to build up to 40 minutes, just in timefor me to get pregnant! Well, I am back at it. And this time around I was able to do 20 minutes my first go round. I am up to 30 now. You can do this! Hang in there

<the first time i tried an elliptical, i fell off!!>

First I am so sorry to hear of you losing your daughter Of course that would affect you, dear!!!

I applaud you for being able to change your diet! I know exercise is incredibly important for health..heart, blood pressure, overall strength, everything. But for weight loss if you have made the huge change of decreasing your calories and increasing the nutrition of those calories, you are well on the way to success. Please don't beat yourself up for not being able to be as fast or effective as you want...just doing anything is helpful and literally small steps to future.

Thanks for all the kind comments. Being sick for so long and then losing my daughter so suddenly right when I thought things were starting to look up really threw me in a tail spin. I still struggle with situational depression. It does make it hard to even force myself to get up and move. I have a very active son who wants me to go hiking again and play tag and bike ride and I know I need to for him but I feel like I will be lucky to reach a fitness level where I can before he is an adult and we are only a couple years from the teen years. I force myself to the gym a few days a week. Need to go more but I usually can't force myself to. There is always an excuse not to go.

The very fact that you are surviving the loss of a child speaks volumes to your fortitude and strength. I'm not sure I could do it.

Don't you just love the responses you've gotten so far? I really wish I could have these people follow me around all day long and be my personal cheerleaders.

Take this journey one step at a time and try not to focus on how far away the destination seems. Celebrate the little victories along the way and rely on us to get you through the temporary setbacks. After all, we're all on similar journeys.