how do I stop beating myself up?
 

Hello everyone :)

I'm having a very hard time and I would appreciate any advice if anyone has been in a similar situation or just in general lol.

I lost 60lbs in a year using WW Points and was at my goal weight. But in July, I lost my job, moved out of state with my mother, found and lost a really special relationship, and chose to taper and then altogether quit my anti-depressant/anti-anxiety meds (with doctor supervision lol) During these months, and for no good reason, I went off my plan, didn't exercise and literally ate whatever I wanted. As a result, I have gained 23 pounds back. None of my clothes fit at all. So I am a week back into dieting with WW Points again and I was wondering how to go easy on myself and stay motivated? I am really having a rough time with it. I am starving and constantly criticizing myself for being in this situation after I had worked so hard to lose all that weight. It feels like it will take forever to lose it. Any help would be so appreciated. :)

Focus on the present moment only. It's the only moment that matters. Focusing on the past brings guilt and focusing on the future brings anxiety. Neither have a place in your present!!

I've never done WW, but if you're constantly hungry, that's not good. Modify your food choices to those that are low in sugar and high in protein, fiber and fat. Let go of your belief that you need to "punish" yourself for gaining weight. You DON'T! Modify your food macro (carbs/fat/protein) ratio to where you are eating at a deficit without ravenous hunger. It IS possible and you deserve it!

You sound like you'd be a good candidate for mindfulness training. Talk to your doctor about it. He may be able to help you find a therapist who specialises in this field. Its the newest approach to psychological tools i think but it comes from buddhism. And we discuss it in a thread on the living maintenance forum which is called summarise your diet plans to get here or something like that. It will be easy to find. the other stuff should be interesting to you also.

However, sounds like you should have stayed on your antidepressants. I had a similar thing happen to me a few years ago. I went off them and ended up losing my business. Now that i am on them again, i am never ever going off them again. The setbacks i tend to experience are so great although they can occur without going off meds too.

Anyway you are on the wagon again. In therapy i learnt how to do what's called nurturing self talk. WEll, no its what i just called it. My therapist never taught it to me, its just something that i picked up from the experience. Strange.

A little bit of anger at oneself can be useful sometimes. I used self disgust to get me back on track this year. But after that, the negative stuff can be just self defeating. Let go the negative thoughts when they are arise. REcognise that you will respond more positively to calming, nurturing, forgiving self talk. Forgive yourself. Its not like you didn't have a lot going on so under the circumstances, its very forgivable that you went backwards.

And going backwards is pretty standard for most people on this sort of journey. They are just par for the course. Give yourself a break. Learn to be a bit kinder to yourself. Show compassion to yourself. And be patient. There is no great hurry.

So why do you think you are starving? Are your calories too low? Or are you still depressed? I find depression makes me want to eat a lot more, unless i'm seriously depressed, then i don't eat at all. So find ways to look after yourself. Be gentle and kind to you and slowly your mood may lift and then losing weight will be easier.