I'm tired of hiding!
 

So, here's my story. I'm 39 and I've been overweight my most my life. It's gotten out of hand in the last 10-12 years. I currently weight 295lbs. I've tried many, many diets and while I have good success in the beginning, I never stick with it. Once someone tells me that they can tell I've lost weight or give me some other compliment, I sabotage myself. I've come to realize that in a way, I'm scared to lose the weight. I've had things happen to me in the past that make me hide away behind the fat. I can't afford this behavior anymore. I have to lose the weight for my health and because I'm tired of not living my life! I don't have many friends to share this with and going at it alone has gotten me nowhere. So, I'm hoping to get support and encouragement to help me FINALLY break down this barrier.

Welcome C6D. Thanks for sharing your story. You sound determined and motivated. Good luck on your journey. Have you decided on a weight loss plan? I'm asking because I am just restarting my journey and trying to decide what I want to do.

Welcome! :welcome3:

Thanks so much for sharing your story.

I struggle with exactly the same thing and I don't understand why.

You will find a lot of support here!

Hi @staceydanielle! Right now, I am not on structured plan like weight watchers or anything. I generally know the right foods to eat and I have found an exercise that I love (kickboxing). When I'm on track, I do use the my fitness pal app to track my calories. Logging my food is a big help. I also use several websites that have ww recipes. I'll share if you like.

@C6D, I would love to use some WW recipes. I am thinking about officially joining WW online, but I don't think I want to spend the money yet since there are so many free resources available. I use a calorie tracking app too. Loseit.com

Hi doingmybest! Thanks for replying. After much contemplation, I think the reason I self sabotage is a fear of being noticed which goes back to my past.
That's my self diagnosis at least. I should probably speak to a professional. I'm an extremely private person so I'm struggling with that. Sharing here is a big step. Maybe we can help and encourage each other here.

@staceydanielle my favorite site is skinnytaste.com it has tons of recipes and most are quick and easy. Laaloosh.com & slenderkitchen.com have some good ones too.

Thanks C6D. I'll be checking those out!

Welcome! And I am not on WW, but I have tried a few of the recipes from skinnytaste and they are fantastic.

Looks like we're in a similar boat. Good luck to you!

Hi C6D! :welcome2: If you feel you are sabotaging your weight in an effort to hide behind it because of events in the past, you probably are right. It sounds like you know yourself pretty well. But do you know if you can overcome those issues on your own? If not, it really might be helpful for you to speak to a therapist or clergy, someone who can help you work through your emotions. Congrats on wanting to lose the weight for your health and future! You will find lots of support here! Since you know your trigger to fall off the wagon is compliments from others on how well you're doing, do your best to be mindful of that when it occurs and not repeat the sabotage. We can't keep doing the same thing and expect different results, and I believe you when you say you're tired of hiding. Good luck! You can do this!

C6D, Welcome!

I think you have alot going for you- and you are with the right group of folks. We all have had weight issues and health issues, so trust me, we can RELATE to you and your feelings. Some even more than others.

:wel3fc: and we are sure glad you've chosen to join us on the journey!

:hug:MrsKevin

@mara Thank you for your reply. I made the Asian Turkey meatballs from that site tonight. I love them. However, I did overcook them tonight :(

@danimae11 Thank you for your reply. I hope we both find the help here to get past our barriers. good luck to you as well!

@Jacqui_D Thank you for your reply. At some point, I probably will seek professional help. My plan of action right now is to be very aware of my triggers and maybe start a journal. I also plan to be active here. Reading posts, encouraging others and asking for encouragement when I need it.

@MrsKevin Thank you for your reply. I am very excited to have found this forum.

Hello C6D...Welcome! Wishing you good luck with your efforts!