I finally broke down and realized....
 

THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR SUPPORT!
Things are much better now, mind and body! I'm restarting my weight
loss journey and it feels amazing!

:hug::carrot::hug::carrot::hug:

Goodness hun, I suggest you look into seeing a therapist or maybe begin by talking to your personal physician about your apparent depression. You have more going on than body image issues.

Chrissy, I'll echo what Celery said. You shouldn't have to live that way, being miserable all the time. Please consider talking to a therapist or medical professional about this. If you don't want to talk to a professional yet, feel free to vent in the Depression and Other Issues section- there are lots of very caring people in there (myself included ;) ) that understand what you're feeling like and would be more than willing to listen.

Whatever you decide, I wish you and your children peace and health and happiness. :hug:

Hey honey! I echo what others have said on this thread, a therapist is the best route to go, but its wether you are ready for that or not. The very bottom line is, as you say, you don't want your son to grow up like this. When you start thinking about going out, just take a deep breath and say it to yourself over a few times. You don't want your son to grow up like this. Those breaths should help you focus even when you are just reaching to eat the wrong things too. Start with a 10 minute walk around your home, just you and your little man. I really do hope being on here helps. I couldn't even imagine what you have been through, but we are all here to listen and motivate. You aren't alone.