Testing the Waters in NYC
 

I'm not sure how I even came across this site today...no doubt it was while I was bored at work and trying to keep my mind off the pack of Reese's my co-worker brought to the office...
Today is Day 9 of having changed my eating habits. I guess I'll categorize it as having relatively drastically changed my eating habits...I won't bore you with the specifics of what I have and have not put in my mouth in the past 9 days, but it's unarguably an improvement over my usual regime of the last, oh, 35 years. Went to the doctor yesterday and was disappointed to find I had not lost any weight yet, but I guess I gained this weight slowly and gradually and that will be how it has to come off as well. At the very least, I hope to maintain where I'm at now and not get any heavier.
It feels good to have finally exerted some control over at least one area of my life. I was tired of feeling overwhelmed by everything I thought I just couldn't change about myself and my circumstances. Some things I CAN'T change, but some things I can at least try to change. It's hard, though. I definitely need help.
5 years ago this month I gave up a couple of addictive behaviors I had been letting control me for many years. I don't consider myself "sober" yet, because my definition of sobriety includes emotional sobriety, and I haven't achieved that yet. But I have to remember that if I have the ability to abstain from those self-destructive behaviors, then I can apply what I have learned by doing so to not using food in a self-destructive manner, too. One step at a time, I guess--and maybe now I'm ready to address my emotional eating and my addiction to food.
This is not all to say that I anticipate that I will be perfect or without "relapse". Relapse is a part of recovery. I'm not going to beat myself up if I succumb to the temptation of ice cream on a hot Saturday night or some M&M's at the movies. Because compared to what I WAS eating, it's still a marked improvement. I don't think total deprivation will work for me. Balance is something I work towards in every arena of my life, and this is no different, I guess. A healthy balance rather than mindless indulgence and compulsion.
I guess I should offer some of the basics: I'm a 35-year old female in the non-profit sector in NYC, married, and unhappy with my health and my appearance as it relates to my weight.
Any questions? Feedback?
Happy to be here.

Welcome! You are so right about how the weight will come off gradually. Whenever I have the attitude that it has to be off in record speed, I have not succeeded. You'll get there. :)

Good for you. Welcome to the site and good luck.
Emotional eating is difficult to deal with, I come from a long line of addicts and luckily food was the one thing I couldn't turn down (again, very good for you to have conquered other addictions.) I know you can do it with food, too!

The thing I tell myself daily is that food is merely to keep you living, sure, it can taste great, too, but the main purpose of eating is for survival. It keeps me from over-indulging. . most of the time.