[AutumnSky]

Hello everyone!

I'd been on the forums several times in the past, and after lurking around the past few days I decided it is time to join! I feel like I could really use the support and understanding from people who know what it's like to be in this boat, and I also want to be able to help others from the knowledge and experiences I've had on my journey so far!


To tell you where I'm coming from, I was overweight - and miserable because of it - for my whole life up until I was 19 years old. I spent my younger years caught in a vicious cycle of being ridiculed for my weight, feeling miserable because of it, and using food to comfort and numb myself and deal with my problems. When I was 19, I'd decided I'd had it, and for the first time I made an attempt to change my body. I lost 80 pounds and transformed into a new person inside and out. I became happy and confident and thought everything was great. I thought my struggles with weight were a thing of the past. Not quite..

After several months I slowly fell out of my healthy lifestyle and began struggling with food again. Once the honeymoon of being in my "new self" wore off, all the problems that were still there re-emerged. I came to the sad realization that losing the weight would not solve all of my problems and make me happy, like I'd always assumed it would. I began repeatedly losing and gaining the same 5-10 pounds. Over the past year, in response to feeling unable to deal with stress and all the things going on in my head, I began stuffing my face again to distract and calm myself, and I gained 20 pounds. Until a few days ago, I felt totally out of control. I'm terrified of gaining all the weight back and going back to the miserable self-loathing person I was before. I also don't want to be the miserable food and weight preoccupied nut I was the past few years constantly losing and gaining the same few pounds. I didn't want to give up my 'food as comfort' because I was scared to try to cope without it. Now I feel I've reached my breaking point, and I need to make some serious changes in my life and get myself back on track. I want to re-adopt my lifestyle change, and this time address the problems underneath it that cause my emotional eating. I want to develop a healthy relationship with food. I think that being part of this forum will be helpful to me, because I can connect with others who struggle with these problems as well, which is something I have not done in the past. So if you've made it this far (I know this was quite long!) I'm looking for some buddies to go through this with together. Let's do this!!!

[Onederchic]

You are coming in with a great attitude I wish you all the best on your journey.

Hugs
Michelle

[leeway]

Hi AutumnSky!
So many of us have lost weight only to gain it back (& more), sometimes more than once - how smart, at your age, to realize that weight gain is not really about the food, it's often about emotions and how we deal (or don't) with them - knowing that will help you achieve your goals once and for all - the support you need is here - we'll all be here to cheer you on.

Glad to have you join us! There are lots & lots of different groups and forums - I'm sure you'll find some that will keep you motivated and inspired - you'll be a wonderful addition to any of them. Try the 20 somethings and the weight loss support forums, they're active and very helpful - also the Success stories are a must for motivation.

There are bunches of people here with more to lose and some with less - the bottom line is that we all have to do it a day at a time. The good thing is that we'll have lots of company along the way.

I've only been here since last fall, having NEVER been part of an online forum. What has been so eye-opening is how much it has helped me. Whenever I feel overwhelmed or defeated, I just log on and read some of the success stories, complete with their before & after photos - or read about others still dealing day to day with their challenges - and before I know it, the time has flown by and so have all the thoughts of going off track or giving up. It has made all the difference in my success so far.

So welcome - you 've found the right place - join in by inspiring us and being inspired!

All the best - good luck with your goals,
Lee

[AutumnSky]

Thank you both!! Already this is very encouraging

After I lost the weight, I was so inspired and moved by what it had done for me, that I wanted to help others do the same, and decided to continue on at school to become a weight loss counselor. At this point, I'm still pursuing a broader degree in counseling, but now 2 years into my program I'm feeling like the biggest hypocrite. I assumed that choosing this career would automatically keep me healthy and on track, because I'd be a big hypocrite otherwise.. but I learned that knowing this and acting on it are two totally different things! For a while I felt like "who the heck am i" to be doing a job like this, I'm totally full of it!" but now I see that a. i was falling back into old patterns because I was afraid of going forward with my life and facing new challenges, b. its ok for me to seek help and support on the way too! Doing this program at school has taught me so much about myself, while helping learn how to help others, and I think all of this that I have been going through is me working through all my stuff so I can one day be of help to others.

Well that turned into a long winded-rant, but.. again, thanks it feels good to be doing this!

[leeway]

I think you figured it out - it's certainly not about being a hypocrite. It's about being able to personally relate to what others are going through, offering advice, support and empathy that is coming from your own real-life experience.
Now that doesn't mean that all counselors must experience everything first hand in order to be effective - that's just not true or possible. But your struggles and how you overcome them will give you an added prespective in helping others face these challenges themselves.
Life would be very overwhelming and depressing if there was never any good that came from tragedy, struggles and obstacles - it is the lessons learned and how we use them to help ourselves and others that makes the difference. You sound like you truly get it and will use your lessons wisely.