Hello! I'm kind of nervous and excited to share my story with you all.
My name is Hayley, and I am only nineteen years old. But more importantly, I classify as morbidly obese. I weigh 295 pounds at the moment. I have always been very overweight - I can't remember a single time in my life I felt thin, or even "chubby". I've spent the majority of my life hiding behind layers of insecurities and excuses.
When I was in school I was teased so much that my self-confidence took a major nosedive. Even in grade school I was humiliated on a daily basis - I would go to school miserable, then come home and cry about how I was treated. It never really changed - I switched schools a few times, and finally, I started having panic attacks in my sophomore year of HS.
I ended up using several different kinds of medication, and from there I became very depressed. I spent a month out of school mostly staying in my room crying all day, and seriously considering ending my life. I finally began a combination of home-schooling and attending private school.
I currently am extremely concerned for my health and self-esteem. I feel like a different person than the one I see in the mirror - and sometimes, I can't even find any clothes to fit me in my closet. My life has become very sad, at times.
I signed up with the gym Curves, and I am finally ready to make some changes. I just thought having support would be a lovely thing, too.
So I'm happy to meet all of you. It's good to know that someone else feels the way I do.
I felt very similarly in high school. I'm so glad you've decided to do this.
A couple of pieces of advice:
Just keep going! You eat too much &/or skip exercising one day? No big deal--just get back on the horse the next day.
Don't push yourself too hard too fast. I always started exercising every spare moment and severely limiting my calories when I tried at your age. It didn't work--I got tired of it, and my body didn't like it. Listen to people here if they suggest you up your calories or moderate your exercising. This has to be sustainable!
Be patient with yourself.
We're here for you.
I hope I don't seem to pushy, but these are the things I wish I had heard when I was your age. I"m sure people told me similar things, but I never heard them. I want you to feel good about yourself because I remember all the bad feelings you talked about from my own history.
Welcome Hayley and good luck ! Congratulations on starting with Curves, I did that and it was a great help to me . I think you are wise to start now, it only gets harder as you get older! Keep posting , there is all kinds of help for you in these forums.
Hayley! Welcome! I think this is a great place to start! Im new here as well. I want you to know that you can acheive anything. And I want you to realize how beautiful you are! LETS DO THIS TOGETHER!
I had a rough time all throughout my school years too,- I was taller than everyone, had really curly hair and was always fat or chubby, so needless to say I didn't fit in. I also had suicidal thoughts throughout my HS years and had kids threatening to kill me, and since it was before Columbine- the teachers, principals and school didn't take the threats seriously. Eventually I had to drop out and just get my GED because it became too much to deal with everyday.
Congrats on starting so early, keep coming around, you'll find lots of advice and support here.
Last edited by ringmaster; 09-18-2009 at 06:54 PM.
Welcome to this amazing site! I was 18 when I started losing weight, and I was 317 pounds, so I know how you feel. Throughout school, I was tormented because of my weight, and I know how you feel about the confidence slump. What we are trying to do, is possible. Through all of the wonderful people on this forum, you can do this. If you need help, or just want to talk, feel free to message me. Good luck.
Welcome, and remember that you can do it! I think it's kind of like golf (at least how I play), just keep hitting the ball in the right direction. You'll eventually knock it right in!
Hi Hayley... I'm Haley... I never meet many people with my name... anyways when I started losing weight I was 290 however I never felt like the fat kid and I was never made fun of (I know you all think I am so lucky) however in that sense I didnt know I really had a problem... I never looked in the mirror and saw the fat girl...I always thought I was pretty cute but maybe I am impartial. This forum offers so much help and I wish you the best of luck. Exercising will also make you feel so much better...sounds crazy but you will feel energized eventually... If you ever need anything feel free to message me... I have learned a lot on my journey
I do know how you feel, I ended up with anxiety/depression under the same circumstances from Jr High to High School. Not to mention a horrible stomach ulcer.
So if you ever need any support, shoot me an IM. I wish you the best!
Kind of depressing intro :)
Congrats on starting so early, keep coming around, you'll find lots of advice and support here.
How awesome that you are doing this NOW - with so much of your life ahead of you. 
