Binger/Compulsive eater
 

Hey everyone,

I've been lurking & reading here for a few weeks now, & I finally decided to take the plunge & join in! I'll be turning 40 this August, & I promised myself last December that I'd get into really good shape & look awesome by my B-Day. I actually did lose a lot of weight over the following months, but lately I've been gaining it all back again & I'm starting to panic! I'm actually a very active person- I'm a runner, I lift weights & I don't sit still much in general, (I hike, bike, do lots of yard work, etc.) My real trouble is my EATING. Most of the time I follow a healthy low-carb approach, (lots of lean proteins & veggies), but unfortunately I'm also a binger/ compulsive eater. :(

I'm here because not only does this look like a wonderful forum in general, it also has a place for people with my food issues to get support. Awesome! :)

I'm ready to get a handle on my problem, and I'm also ready to admit that I can't do it on my own, (I should know- I've been trying handle it alone for years now.) I think that with a little support & accountability, however, I'll make it, so I'm really excited to jump into the forums & the binge-free challenges!

Thanks for being here for me, and I can't wait until I can put a weight loss ticker in my signature line & start using those little chickie "pounds lost" avatars!

i think im a binger/over eater too. i was doing ok for almost 2 weeks and todaY I binged im not too happy

Hi there! :)

I did great from December through about April- I lost weight & gained muscle and was starting to look pretty good, but then I fell off the wagon & started gaining fat again. :mad:

My problem is sugar & flour, (all grains, really.) I have an addictive response to them, and once I start eating them it's really hard to get myself back on track. I went home to see my mom in April & I ate lots of off-plan food, (& brought my re-awakened carb addiction back with me.) It's kind of been a downward spiral from there, and it's been REALLY out-of-control since I started training for my upcoming half marathon. I have to eat at least some carbs in order to have the energy to run thirteen miles, and it's been really hard on me. I'm only supposed to eat them before my long runs, but they've been creeping into my regular, every day diet. Eating them also causes me to have crazy, insatiable hunger & cravings, and yesterday was really the last straw: I basically spent the entire day going in & out of the kitchen, eating & eating & eating and still wanting to eat more. I always think I can handle having some carbs in my diet & I think I'll be able to control how & when I eat them, but it never actually works out that way... :(

I want to be a marathoner, though, so the time has come for me to get my act together & deal with this problem.

Oh, I should also mention that I have extreme hypothyroidism, (I have no thyroid gland), so I'm super insulin resistant. Anything other than lean proteins and non-starchy veggies make me gain weight like crazy!

Hey Moxiegirl
 

Reading both your posts tells a familiar story for me. I was an Anorexic and then bulimic many years back, both addicitve eating patterns.
Just a question on your eating Moxiegirl, do you know why? We usually self-medicate with whatever substance does it for us, i.e. drugs, alcohol, food, - because of emotional pain which we are wanting to dull with our chosen analgesic. What I can hear in your story is that you are trying to stop the behaviour by just not doing it. But that is a bit like hacking the top of a weed in the garden rather than pulling it up by the roots. Maybe you already have done work on this, but if not you might need to work on the underlying issues. That was how I got out of my active carb addiction.
I wish there were quick fixes for these things, but I suppose that really is an addict way of thinking too. Slow and steady wins the race they say.

Wow! Good on you for the marathon goal! My partner is into running too. He's in training for another half coming up soon. My hat goes off to you guys!

Finni:hug:

Hi there, and thank you for your post!

Yep, I do know why I am the way I am with food, (it all stems from my childhood- big surprise, huh?) I was anorexic for many years also, (which is why I have no thyroid gland today- I fried it out from years of starvation.) About three years ago, I decided that I wanted to recover from the ED, so I started eating normal portions of healthy foods. Unfortunately, (and I've found this is extremely common in recovering anorexics), I swung all the way from one end of the spectrum to the other & became a binger and COE. I guess when you finally "unlock" yourself from years of restriction, you can sort of unleash a floodgate, so to speak. I spent a few years working on closing that floodgate back down, (without going back to starving again, which was really hard for me because I gained a LOT of weight), and just trying to have a normal relationship with food. I do pretty well most of the time, until I start "getting into the sugar & flour" again. It's just very addictive stuff for me, and one bite leads to massive cravings & out-of-control binges. (You know what they say, "One bite is too much and no amount is ever enough.")


I guess what I mean to say is that YES, I do know what my emotional triggers are, and I no longer let myself binge because of them. As for my physical addiction to sugar & flour, well, I'm still working on that one....

I think being able to recognize your triggers and acknowledge them for what they are is a huge step. Good luck to you all.

wow that sounds rough, but i hope you succeed! i took a guess at my emotional triggers but for me nothing makes sense. when i do exercise and feel right--i feel good even though i eye a donut and think how good it would taste. and at first i refuse it and i feel ok about it. and this will keep on for a week or two and then for some reason i wake up, ignore everything and binge until i make myself sick. or i dont exercise. either one of those makes me feel sick and awful. now what i dont understand is why am i repeatedly doing something that harms me? if i feel good about exercising and eating right why do i always fall off the wagon? im so frustrated and beginning to think ill never be the way i want. i know its not going to disappear over night but looks like its not even moving at all.

Welcome to 3FC and good luck with your goals.


Hugs
Michelle

Maybe read some books on compulsive eating?

I know for me I thought maybe I have some sort of food addiction because I feel I always want to eat- even if I just ate an hour or two ago.

I just started reading the book:

Conquer Your Food Addiction : The Ehrlich 8-Step Program for Permanent Weight Loss by Caryl Ehrlich

And honestly I'm liking it- sure I'm not too far in- but it's making me go hmmm a LOT! I'm like this really makes sense to me- how I've formed habits and I have to break them. It's like the cigarette smoker who has quit but usually after work craves a cig- the only reason why is because they used to smoke a cig right after work everyday- it just takes time to get out of that routine.

I'm also reading: Food Addiction: The Body Knows: Revised & Expanded Edition by Kay Sheppard

It talks about how some of us are just more sensitive to the effects of sugar and carbs and helps you to rewire a bit- the only part I don't like about this is it has a diet plan, but it's a relatively short and straightforward book.

Personally I like the first book better because it goes into behavioral issues.

thanks for your suggestions. i almost feel like theres nothing wrong with me, although others would say i have an ed..not saying theyre not real but its not real with me. but then again i havent succeeded. of course ill try again but i really need to stay on track even though this is exactly what i said the past 3894798745395 times

Hey, thanks for the nice welcome, Michelle! :)

Beerab- thank you for the book suggestions, I'll definitely check those out! I've read like everything by Geneen Roth, and also a few others like "When Women Stop Hating their Bodies," and "It was Food Versus Me, and I Won," (that one's by Nancy Goodman & I really liked it a lot!)

Emma,

Originally Posted by :
when i do exercise and feel right--i feel good even though i eye a donut and think how good it would taste. and at first i refuse it and i feel ok about it. and this will keep on for a week or two and then for some reason i wake up, ignore everything and binge until i make myself sick. or i dont exercise. either one of those makes me feel sick and awful. now what i dont understand is why am i repeatedly doing something that harms me? if i feel good about exercising and eating right why do i always fall off the wagon? im so frustrated and beginning to think ill never be the way i want.

Ohhhh boy, do I ever see myself in your words! I could have written that post. That's why I'm here- I've been doing my regular runs with my husband on some evenings, but lately I've been totally blowing off my strength training workouts & everything else I normally do in the mornings, and I've been heading straight to the fridge instead. I'm "back in the food" again lately, and I'm hoping that joining here will help me back out of it again, (for good this time, maybe? Please?) It's a mystery to me why I do this too- Maybe Finni is right, & I still have some emotional stuff I haven't worked through yet?

Originally Posted by :
of course ill try again but i really need to stay on track even though this is exactly what i said the past 3894798745395 times

Ugh, I feel your pain & frustration SO MUCH right now! :( Believe me though- I'm right there with ya'!!! Maybe we should buddy-up??? I don't know if I can send PMs & stuff yet, since I'm brand new here... I'll have to check into setting up a journal or something, so I can continue with this writing & talking to people who are in the same situation as I am, it really helps me to know I'm not going through this alone! :)

I have recently come to accept I am also a binge eater. I have been struggling for a while. And I was just starting to research overeaters annoymous but the group idea scares me.

I did just buy Shrink Yourself which is suppose to address the issues of binge eating. Its a first step to getting better.

Also the carb thing for me is what sets me in a tailspin. When I binge its usually sweet carbs like pop tarts, little debbies, cake, ect. I can't eat just one so I trying not to keep it in my home. Yesterday I threw a angel food cake down the garbage disposole after I ate more than 1/2 of it! It was the only way I would stop (getting rid of it).

Hi, Jennifer!

Boy, I sure can't tell you how many times I've put stuff down the garbage disposal, (in a mad panic, of course, and with my mouth still full of whatever it was I was trying not to eat the entire thing of!) :lol:

Sounds very, very familiar!

I've been back on track for two days now, and for me "back on track" means back on low carb & back on eating pre-planned meals at planned times ONLY, no snacking & no getting into my husband's sugary, carby stuff, (like his granola. One bite = MADNESS!) :dizzy:

Here are my main daytime meals:

Breakfast: Post-workout low carb protein recovery shake

Lunch: (Pick One daily)

Chicken breast on top of a small mixed veggie salad

Tuna or egg salad on low carb tortilla

Turkey sandwich on low carb tortilla

Small chef salad with hard boiled egg & turkey

Dinner:

Salad with salmon burger on top

Grilled salmon with sauteed broccoli or brussels sprouts

Chef salad

low carb soup

grilled chicken or pork with side salad or sauteed veggies

Weekends are more "fun" but still low carb. We usually barbecue some sort of meat like steaks or pork chops or sausages, and we'll have low carb coleslaw or something along with it.

If I can manage to stick with this and just use my sugary, carby PowerGels & Gatorade during my long runs ONLY, I think I'll be A-OK!

(Hey Emma, I actually did my morning workout today, YAY for me!) :cp:

You seem exactly like me except that I would be happy to do half a marathon :) It is so horrible to ruin all the work out I put in with all the food I intake. I´m so disapointed in myself for that.

Good luck on your journey.

Boy, I hear ya'! I run a LOT and I lift heavy weights on a regular basis, which is REALLY HARD WORK, and I can make all my progress go away in a matter of just a few weeks if I start binging out of control. Even if I'm still working out a lot throughout a binging period, it all just gets canceled out by the eating. That makes me REALLY MAD at myself, all that killing myself and absolutely nothing to show for it...:mad:

Here's something I read at a bodybuilding forum:

"You can't out-train a bad diet."

Man, is that ever true, too! I'm a prime example of it, (unfortunately)...:rolleyes:

absolutley moxiegrl!! its so frusterating and uncontrollable. im sorta new here too so no worries...today im starting again. i just kept saying to myself "my last binge, my last binge" i know ill have bad foods somewhere down the line but im really going to work hard to keep control and not let food control me.

Yay, I'm glad you came back, Emma! :) Let's stick around here & see if we can figure our junk out! :D

Well, day 3 and I'm still back on track, woo-hoo! My diet is under control & I already did my a.m. neighborhood run, (and tonight will be strength training.)

Today's foodz:

B-Fast - Low carb protein meal replacement shake

Lunch - Tuna salad on LC tortilla

Dinner - Chicken on the BBQ & salad

I'm going to see if I can start a diet blog today, so I can start posting there instead of here.

Here's some :dust: for everyone!!!! :)

I started taking medication and I think is why I gain half that weight I have left over.I don't run no more because,I have feet issues but,I walk..at the mall n thift store shopping..I mean walking 5 hrs is a killer..if you want to reach for food I suggest start reading a good book..so far that is the trick for me not to snack or put up a pre post pic of yourself in the fridge or some hot model and...that will get you to stop eating without thinking.

Ha ha, all great ideas, thank you!!! I like the "hot model on the fridge" idea, personally. Boy, that would sure make you want to step away from the food, wouldn't it? You decide to go on a big binge and you run to the fridge & Giselle Bundchen in staring at you from above the door handle. AAAAAGH!!!! So you turn and run to the cupboards instead, and Karolina Kurkova is hanging out in a bikini, giving you a withering glare & looking superior. EEEEK! Nevermind, I think I'll just wait until dinnertime & have a salad! :lol:

good! i think this is day 3 for me too oddly enough, how many calories are you eating? compared to me that doesnt sound like a lot of food...i wonder if im eating too much? but my calories are rather low...?

Hey Emma!

Knowing me, I'm probably not eating enough food throughout the day, (it seems like no matter how hard I try, I still haven't quite been able to make it to "normal eating" yet, and I'm always either overdoing it or underdoing it.) :rolleyes: It was pointed out to me by a friend last week that I seemed to be restricting my regular food intake in order to try & make up for all the carbs I have to eat before my long runs right now. (They were right, too- I was doing that, without even realizing it!) The thing is, it's not my regular food (lean proteins & veggies), which are going to cause weight gain- being hypothyroid, it's the carbs which will make me fat faster than anything, (like pulling a ring on a rubber raft, no lie!) What she suggested I do is keep eating my regular meals, but try to cut out any unnecessary extra carbs from my pre-run meals, so that's what I'm working on right now. Another thing I'm trying to do is cut out snacks, (even planned ones), because for me, snacking leads to binging, at least lately it has been. I've been really hungry because of all the extra half marathon training I've been doing, & once I start eating snacky-type food I can't seem to stop.

SO, my plan: Little bit larger regular meals, no snacking, cut out extra carbs I don't actually need from my pre-run meals.

Good job on Day 3, Emma! Let's keep going! :cheer2::cheer2::cheer2:

I'm getting ready to go for a VERY hilly 8-mile run on a nice, woodsy trail now. It'll be hard work, (I'm not great at big hills yet), but it'll be nice, (I love woodsy trails!) :)

wow good for you! running is my enemy! i carry my weight in my lower body and i have short legs and im short myself so i hate it. i tried jogging and i thought i was going to die. anyways, that sounds like a good plan for you i hope it works. im having a hard time reaching the calories i should-even though that sounds ridiculous, but i feel like im eating too much. i havent weighed in yet so i dont know if any of this is working. well see!

Today for breakfast i had my usual milk and corn flakes....but i had some mashed potatoes and corn!! i came home last night and were craving them! but i just told myself to go to bed...dont eat at 12 am!! and i didnt and i was proud of myself. but this morning i had about 1/3cup of mashed potatoes and corn :( owell my plan for the rest of the day is just to eat light, hopefully i wont have sabotaged the day yet.

1/3 cup of mashed potatoes & corn? That's NOTHING! You're doing fine, just keep charging ahead! (Maybe just go for a walk & burn it off, or something, if you're worried about going over your calories for the day.) Are you following a specific diet plan?

Got my run finished, & it was totally awesome! I carry a hydration belt which I normally fill with Gatorade, (4 six 0z. bottles), but today & filled them with half Gatorade & half water. I also didn't use the PowerGel I brought along, so I did great at cutting back my running carbs today! :dancer: I'm stoked. :D

BTW- I had to learn to run over a long period of time, I stank at it at first. (Oh, & I'm also one of the "Pear People"- Long torso, short legs, and I carry all my extra weight in my lower body. Ugh. Makes the booty & thighs especially hard to trim down & tone up.)

haha i hear ya about the pear shape! How did you build up running? Im not good at it but if itll help slim me down faster im up for it. did you follow a specific routine or program? id love to know what you did.

And im counting calories and eating mostly fruits and veggies, then protein, then carbs. I got it from the biggest loser its called 4-3-2-1 4 servings fruit and veggies, 3 protein, 2 carbs and one 200 calorie snack of your choice. I dont know if this is good or not. And i try to be between 1200-1400 a day. I seem to be eating a lot even though i watch my portions. I have no idea if its working. What program were you on and would you reccomend it? Im pretty lost on what i should be doing and im still struggling a lot.

thanks in advance..happy 4th of july!!!

Happy 4th to you, too! :)

The way I learned to run was from my sister, who had hired an instructor to teach her. I started out going sooooooo slowly, like basically walking. I also learned to "glide" rather than bounce up & down, (like picture yourself on cross country skis with invisible poles in your hands, and sort of glide along.) The hard part was going so slowly at first, way slower than you even think you should be going, but it helps you to be able to go longer distances without getting tired out. Once I started trying to go a little bit faster, I did the walk/run thing- I'd walk along the sidewalk & every time I came to a cross street I'd run until I came to the next cross street, then I'd walk again for the next one, etc. Eventually I started stretching it to walking one & running two, three, etc, until I could just do a really slow run with no walking. From there it was on to running all the flats & downhills and walking up hills, and now I can run the hills too. These days I'm working on building my distance & getting my regular pace up to a faster speed. I'm also still not good at super-steep hills yet, but I'm working on them!

I have to say though, I do think power-walking can be really good for exercise & weight loss, as long as you do it honestly & keep your heart rate up to a pace where you're huffing & puffing & sweating the entire time.

My diet is 90% low fat, low calorie, low carb, (I know, fun, huh?)

It's because of not having a working thyroid- sugar, starch & fat causes the pounds to fly onto my body at a scary rate of speed & then stick like cement...:rolleyes: That's the problem I'm having right now with having to eat carbs for running fuel- as much as I run, they're still causing me to gain weight!

Mostly I eat lean proteins & non-starchy veggies, and I also eat some good fats like avocados, a little olive oil, and I take fish oil caps every day too.

My normal diet (aside from the running fuel food) consists of:

Chicken (whole, on the bone)
Chicken breasts
Salmon
Salmon burgers
Tuna
Low carb protein powder
Turkey

Lettuce
Broccoli
Tomatoes
Cucumbers
Radishes
Kale
Spinach
Green Beans
Brussels sprouts
Cauliflower
Red & green peppers
Carrots (a little)
Onions (a little)

Herbal tea, water, regular & decaf coffee, stevia sweetener

One night I have a salad with a salmon burger on top, another night I'll have grilled chicken & green beans, another night I'll have broiled salmon & brussels sprouts, etc.

On the weekends we might BBQ some shrimp, chicken sausages, pork chops or steaks, but we usually still have a low carb veggie side dish, (like a salad or coleslaw.)

I have a few drinks on Friday & Saturday nights only, and they're either:

red or white wine,
low carb beer
cocktails made with diet soda

Yep, that's about as exciting as it gets! :lol:

OK, I think this post is long enough now, have a nice holiday! :)

Lost ya for a while there!
 

Hi Moxiegrl and Emma101,

enjoyed reading you girls encouraging one another.:hug: It's been a heluva journey from ED to where I am today, and I still have to be so aware of AB's sneaky tricks and subtle invitations which are just in the corner of my mind just about every day. I really could hear myself in both of your posts. Especially the feeling like I'm eating too much. But it is such a deceiving thing that, because it's the not eating enough that puts on the wieght just as much, and stuffs up the old metabolism eh? My problem has been my body struggling to process the insulin from the carbs, but it has got a lot better now that I am more conscious of the Glycaemic Index of foods.
I just have to stick to it. Now that I feel good about who I am as a person it is harder to motivate myself to stick to my plans. I used to be so down on myself that I kicked my a** into doing the work. Now that I like me I have to find a different way of motivating myself - something like I deserve to be the best I am!, or something like that. Still working on that.

Thanks for your thoughts and ideas. I'll borrow some of them. Have a good week!

Finni

well my hats off to both of your successes despite the challengees of previous ed and other things! Finni, what was your eating plan? I just cant seem to get this right. If i eat a low amt of calories i seem to be eating too much. i dont know what to do...but here is what one of my daily meal plans was (btw im 5'3'' 170, active, and overweight! :()

B: oatmeal, milk, almonds
S: smoothie made from walnuts, blueberries, milk, plain yogurt
L:Turkey on whole wheat, a peach
D: Salad with squash and guacamole, and a whey drink

i dont know if i am really eating too much or its just in my head I dont know!!! im so lost and want to lose this weight so bad. I go back and forth-eat right, binge, eat what ever i want, go back to eating right, and again and again. Even know i started this week great im off the wagon again. But i havent binged. Ive found that if i can just eat what i want i dont binge. But both of those are bad and i want to lose weight. i dont know why i keep failing so quickly. I cant even do it for a week! whats wrong with me?

I hope you both continue on your successes though

I can relate.
 

i've been a closet eater in denial for a long time.untill last year.i would always say to everyone i don't understand why i'm gaining so much weight when inside i knew.it was because on the way home from the grocery store i was eatting 2 candy bars and throwing the wrappers out the window before i got home so no one would see me or when kids are at school and boyfriend was at work i would go and get honey buns, those tiny donuts you get at the store, go to mcdonalds and dunkin donuts or any where and eat and eat and this way again there was no trail of me eatting any food.i finally told my mom and boyfriend last year whay i had been doing after i had lost 35lbs.i still have a hard time since i put the weight back on plus an extra 7lbs. and i get mad and what do i do just eat more instead of trying to lose weight and be healthy.i just started dieting and exercising a few days ago and hope i'm on my way to something better and hope this site helps you.good luck!!!:)

Hey Emma,

It sure doesn't look like you're eating very much to me, (especially if you're just having one bowl of oatmeal in the morning.) What you're eating would make me feel HUNGRY all the time, because of the carbs & fruit sugar & lack of protein, (like in your salad. I know you have a protein drink, but I think a chicken breast would fill you up a lot more.) The lean proteins make me feel satisfied, especially along with loads of raw veggies. I wonder if you keep going back to binge eating because the carbs & sugar are keeping you feeling hungry & craving more carbs & sugar, ya' know?

Finni,

I'm not sure if I mentioned this already, but being hypothyroid has caused me to become super insulin-resistant also. Eating low glycemic foods can work really well in helping you to lose weight- that's why I mostly eat low carb- no insulin spikes that way!

Originally Posted by :
Now that I feel good about who I am as a person it is harder to motivate myself to stick to my plans. I used to be so down on myself that I kicked my a** into doing the work. Now that I like me I have to find a different way of motivating myself

Ha, how true- you work so hard to accept & love yourself for the person whom you are right now, but it can sometimes backfire and make you relax a little too much, and you can become complacent about your physical appearance.

Originally Posted by :
Now that I like me I have to find a different way of motivating myself - something like I deserve to be the best I am!, or something like that.

Absolutely! Of course you should love & accept yourself as you are right now, but that needs to be IN CONJUNCTION WITH working towards being healthy, not IN PLACE of it! Loving and accepting yourself as you are today and not waiting until you reach a weight goal is a good thing, but the reason we're taught to do that is so we can undertake our journey to fitness & weight loss from a place of love, and not from a place of self-loathing and hatred. I hated myself a lot for a long time, and it never helped me get where I need to be. (I'd always get on a negative self-rant about how ugly & fat I was, which would end up in a binge every single time.) Now that I think I'm a pretty neat person and I don't berate & insult myself constantly because of my jeans size, I can move forward towards my goals while feeling really happy & positive, instead of feeling negative and constantly miserable.

wanttobethinandtrim,

Your story sounds very familiar! I finally had to tell my husband about my binging, but it felt really great to get it off my chest! It also helped me to stop almost completely. I only fall into the trap once in a great while now, and I find that if I tell someone about it right away every time, I can usually stop it in it's tracks. I hadn't had one in a looooong time before I joined here, but I'm having problems with needing to eat more carbs for my running right now- having them is causing massive cravings for me & I'm wanting to eat them all the time instead of just using them as fuel right before my runs. Being here has already helped me immensely, though! I haven't binged again at all since I joined, and I'm working HARD to leave those carbs alone if I'm not going to run 13 miles that day!

Thanks for stopping in & visiting, everybody! I really appreciate having people to "chat" with! :)

[Ive found that if i can just eat what i want i dont binge. But both of those are bad and i want to lose weight. i dont know why i keep failing so quickly. I cant even do it for a week! whats wrong with me?

Hi Emma
Firstly, nothings 'wrong' with you! For me that sort of thinking is an invitation to the fridge! As Moxiegrl encouraged me, we have to love ourselves and know we're okay just as we are to find the motivation to shower on ourselves the rewards of health and wellbeing.:hug:
What worked for me was definitely eating more lean protein and fresh fruit and veges. If you have a mix of almonds, sunflower and pumpkin seeds (about 6 almonds) it is equivalent to one serve of whole protein. It's a great snack to have at hand.
I also found that 6 small meals worked really well when I was a bit younger, but now that I'm older, I'm down to 3 straight meals a day. Don't really get hungry till close to the meal. But hunger never was the issue. It was that I felt like eating- plain and simple. That is where the thought of "eating what I like" can be problematic. We can eat good tasting food that we like, but not becasue we feel like it, but because it is what we need to nurture our beautiful bodies and minds!!
I'm preaching to me too here! I need to keep my eyes on what I know to be true. I'm usually on a great track for about 6 weeks, and then I get the poor me's and say how unfair it is that i have to be so careful , and tell myself I deserve more food! Not this time baby! We are here for each other. yay!:carrot:

You ladies are wonderful!
Great to share in this encouraging conversation!
Mwah!
Finni

Hey Moxiegrl

I was interested in the thought you brought out about having to tell your partner about the binging and stuff. I used to do the same. But I have had to remove my partner from inputting this part of my life, as over the years his judgment of me has made it a lot worse. he is a wonderful guy, but doesn't really have any understanding of what ED and the associated thinking is like. We have a very strong relationship, so I am able to have a clear boundary around this no-go zone for him, and it is definitely helping to [B]not[[B) have him clomping around in here in his steel cap boots!!!

Just an awareness for you, and I may be completely off, but I know in myself I can get OTT with the exercise and discipline stuff and it is just replacing my ED with another addiction. Just keep a watch on yourself for those old obssessive patterns:devil: sneaking their evil way back in, hey. I speak to myself too!!

Have a great day..

Finni

thanks for your response! :D im still learning and im sure i will be for a long time. i havent binged for a while, but thats because i eat what i want, but i stay within my calories. Like today i wanted ice cream so i had 1/2 cup and still managed to be under my calories. Im going to give this a try to see if this works because i can manage it. If not then i think ill be in trouble. When i get too strict-thats when i binge. so wish me luck