My name is Sharon and I am approaching my 50th Birthday. I have always been overweight or felt I was. Now I want to loose 50 by my 50th birthday.
The thought of doing this AGAIN has me soo depressed and afraid of failure again. I have tried every diet I can think of, lost the weight, but can't keep it off. A coworker has suggested a 12 step program that has worked for her but I am scared of what I might learn and of failure. But I AM going to do it and I'm hoping the extra support here will help. Thanks for 'listening'.

You say you have tried every "diet" you can think of. Why not make more permanent changes to your life? I used to diet then gain then diet then gain. Finally I get it- I can't eat like that. I can't eat out everyday, I can't live off of chips and all those things I like to eat. BUT I can eat very healthy 90% of the time and then indulge occassionaly. And by occassionaly I mean go out to dinner once a week or something. I used to eat out almost everyday at fast food places, now I will eat out once a week and still pick a better choice. With time I've found that I don't even crave that stuff anymore.

Good luck!

Sharon, welcome! Believe me, coming here will be the difference! If you will check in here each day, get involved, read lots, and post lots, you'll find that your fear of failure will turn into resolve and soon you'll realize that you can do it! And you CAN do it. Just take a look around and you'll find people who have lost SO much weight, over 80 lbs, 100 lbs, 150 lbs! 50 lbs is so do-able! It's just 10 lbs at a time! Set up some mini-goals like that, and it won't feel so daunting. I have over 50 pounds to lose and I am perfectly confident I can do it, and I have yo-yo dieted all my life! If I can do it, so can you! That's how it is here. We all know how it feels, so you are not alone! This time is going to be different! You'll see! Good luck!

What is it about that 50th birthday that wakes us up? I ask because you are the same age I was when I started this journey.

So, I"m here to tell you that you CAN do this. Yes, this chickie - with a sendentary job, post-menopause, actually lost that weight for GOOD!

I can tell you that it is SOOOO worth it. I look and feel 10 years younger (everyone tells me so, too)

I do things I haven't done for years.

So - how can you do it?

beerab hit the nail on the head. Don't diet. Really. Diets don't work.

Change your lifestyle. Whatever you do, make sure it is something you can do for the rest of your life.

Read through the plans here at 3FC. You will find a plan that will work for you.

For me - I actually eat MORE now, than I did 95 lbs ago. I eat 6 times a day. I just changed what I eat. Lots of vegetables and whole foods. Fewer carbs and more protein. I exercise moderately.
Calorie counting is the plan that works for me - but again - look around.

Again - you CAN do this! Post often, so we get to know you better. I think hanging around here really helps me stay accountable, which leads to success.

Hi Sharon and welcome.

I think lots of us have been where you are now. My advice is to plan. Plan, plan, then plan some more. Plan your food for the week, plan your meals for the day and don't have food that you can't control in the house until you can control it. Don't go into "diet mode" where you live on salad leaves, it makes you miserable and it's not sustainable in the long run.

Take small steps, just look at losing your first 7lb and then break down what you have to lose into small manageable goals. At one time I had 130lb to lose, now I have 50lb and I did it by having small, manageable goals, it doesn't seem like such a mountain.

Make changes that you can live with. Eat 3 sensible meals with plenty of variety and a couple of snacks, eat slowly and "consciously" so that you taste your food. Lots of us eat very quickly in front of the tv or reading and so don't even taste what we eat, it takes our stomachs 20 minutes to realise we are full, so eating slowly can give your stomach time to tell you you're full.

Good luck hun, you can do this, but you have to believe, you have to do it for you. Write it down and maybe keep a journal or online blog, so you can talk about your goals, fears and what you want to achieve, its a great way to look at how far you've come.