Greetings & a plea for help
 

Hello. My name is Jennifer. I am 20 years old (yeah, still quite young.), and I live in Southern California. I am an only child and obesity runs in my family. However, I am one of the few who see what a huge issue this is. My mother is suffering daily because of weight issues. She has diabetic neuropathy and a whole sleu of problems, and it's getting really bad with depression. Please read my introduction, even though I have a feeling it may be somewhat lengthy.

I love my personality. I think I am a good person and I can see my good points, but being so big at this age has really really hurt my life. Seeing my mother in the state she is in right now makes me scared. I don't want to be like her, and she wishes for me to be better than this. Luckily, I have been steadily losing some weight with my new place of employment (which, by the way, I completely love. I keep active with working with children. :p) I've been there under three months and my mom compliments me on losing weight. So there IS hope for me, I know this. I also think I am very pretty except my stomach. Now... here is the issue.

I've never had a real boyfriend or anything. In highschool I was always picked on. I was bullied, but I never got into a fight. I just let it go. Well. Last year I got really fed up with myself and just flat out stopped eating. I had one small meal a day and even that made me feel disgusting. I mean, it worked, but I soon got tired of feeling so weak all the time and a friend helped talk me out of that. I am now in a serious LDR. I won't go into many details on that since it's a touchy subject in itself, but I love the guy like crazy. I'm worried that when we finally meet, I won't be what he expects. Pictures can be decieving.

I love playing DDR. I love being with friends, but I just finally feel like it's time to take losing weight seriously. It's almost the new year, so what better time to start? I just really have no idea how to go about it. xD

SO! Here's to new friends and support. I'll support you if you support me. <3

Jennifer, this is a great place to get support on your weight-loss journey. It's great that you recognize the need to be healthy AND that there is a right and a wrong way to go about it. Obviously, your body needs a certain amount of food and exercise to get there. I don't follow a certain plan since I've read many diet books and the good ones all stress the same things: Eat more whole foods (veggies, fruit, whole grains) and less junk (sugar, processed foods, wrong kinds of fat) AND exercise a minimum of 30 minutes a day (walking is extremely effective for beginners).
On another note, I've done the LDR thing, but I met them in person first..then realized they lived nowhere near me. I guess you met the guy online and hopefully he's all he says he is. If so, he may care less about your physical aspects than you think. It's really important that you do the weight loss for YOU, not for someone you've never met in person, ya know. It will all work out. I hope you continue to post on here and make some friends who can support you on your way to a healthier you.
You can try posting in your age group (20-somethings) or join a challenge in "Chics up for a Challenge". Either would be a good place to meet people in the same boat. Best of luck to you!

:welcome:
Glad you found us! You can do this!! Really. If you read my goal story, you will see that obesity runs in my family too. DS2 is currently 350+ lbs and my dad was 450+ lbs. when he died.

I'm here to tell you that YOU are in control of YOU. YOU can change. YOU don't have to follow that path.

Your family history will make it harder for you to lose weight and keep it off, but - hear me - you CAN do it!!!

I look forward to reading your posts around here. 3FC is a GREAT site for support and information.

Hello! I hope to be of some help. And could use some in return. WELCOME. You can do it!!

Welcome! We are happy you found us.

Ms Perception - He says he will love me no matter what; even if I have purple skin and polka dots. xD I know what you mean. I'm NOT doing it just for him. If he even implied for me to do it because of him he'd be kicked to the curb. It's just a nice thought to be healthy when we do meet so that we can do things like go to amusment parks together and walk around the town and parks. <3

Thank you Dizzy and Countingdown too.

This is going to go on another thread too, but please if you can help with this:
I am a very tall girl; six feet or a little over. My bone structure is very unique; I have big hips and a big butt. I fear this is going to be a huge issue in my journey. What do you think an appropriate weight would be? Mom thinks that too much loss would make me look funny, but I really need to do something. :/ I have so many friends that love me for who I am, but I just know that by losing I will gain confidence and be able to teach even better.

Also, how long did it take to lose weight? I want to lose it fast. How much is a good amount per week/month to lose? This is really my first attempt. I have NO idea where to go.

Jennifer, welcome to 3FC! You'll love it here.

you sound like you're built like I am. I'm very tall and you can sometimes feel like you get away with carrying that bit more weight. and in fact it's sometimes true. i dont look as fat as someoone shorter would do at my weight but that's not the point is it?

So far, i've lost around 25 lbs (see my ticker) and it makes such a difference.

I'm not going to say it's easy and we all have lapses (dear god the amount of crap i ate this week) but you can do it. recognising you need to is the first step. just keep on remembering why you're doing this and keep on visiting here and posting when you need it and the weight will drop off before you know it without you having tos tarve yourself.

do you have an idea on how you want to lose weight? I mean, what plan to follow? Where you want to end up?

I'm just starting out on this journey to lose some weight--for the second time in my life!

The first time I was in my 20's. I think it's fantastic you want to do this for yourself--you've got the right motivation! Realise, though, that it really is a better idea to take things slowly. I know it is frustrating: but the slower it coes off, the more chance it has of staying off. Your body has to make a LOT of adjustments while you are losing weight.

Did you know that your fat contains toxins? You don't want to release too many too fast into your body!

This is a fantastic site. Read up on the different plans here: see if something appeals. You'll find something which will work for you.

Thank you for the warm welcomes and encouragement! Well as for how much I want to lose... I was thinking about what Alana said. If it is really that bad to lose a lot at once then I decided to start off with a small goal to see how things go. I'll start with 20-30, then go up from there. :)

Also I have great news. I told my parents for Christmas that all I want is help buying a good scale. (Money is tight for presents this year and they've been kinda sad about it.) Mom thought it was a great idea and she said they'd help. And.... I told her about this site and she said she wants to lose weight with me. Maybe she will join, I don't know though. :)

It's recommended that a person lose 1-2 pounds/week on a healthy weight loss program. Alana was absolutely right...doing it at a healthy pace is MUCH healthier and MUCH more likely to last. I do the 5# challenges on here, so I celebrate every 5# that comes off! About the "right" weight...I used an online BMI calculator and figured out what the healthy weight range is for my height. You're shooting for a BMI of 20-24.9, and it uses you height to calculate it, so it will take that into account.

Also, that is very cool about your mom!! It's so nice to do this with someone, if possible. My mom and I are also trying to help each other and do this together.
Sorry for the length of my posts....I'm a talker!