So sick and tired...
 

Of myself. I have been a lurker off and on. I mostly come to look at the before and after pics and dream that someday that will be me. Well my husband told me today (after seeing a Jenny Craig commercial) that he wanted to see me in a bikini someday when I lost weight.

I told him I have never wore a bikini and I never would. I told him even if I lost a ton of weight, I would never look like the blond girl in the weight loss commercial because I weight 240. If I got down to 130, I would have tons of sagging skin that would look terrible in a bikini! He said he saw me naked before, I told him that was before I gained all this weight.

I know I should not lose weight for him, but I want to for me also! I want to lose it to revive my marriage again, to be able to keep up with my 4 year old, and most of all, to help me feel better! I am sooo miserable right now!

All I want to do is lay around. I have no energy at all. I am having major back problems, and am now recovering from back surgery that caused leg pain and numbness. I am not able to work out like I used to years ago due to that pain. I still have it, and may always have it. I have a new eliptical machine that I want to use so bad but don't know when I will get to!

I someday want to come on here and write my success story. I am 5'7, and 240 lbs. I am going to try my best to lose weight because I am at the end of my rope!

Hey there, Olivia! :wel3fc:

You've got a great start by coming here. Now look around, find a spot or several, and get to posting!

We have the 100 lb club, for those with 100 lbs or so to lose, "Dieting with Obstacles" for those dealing with issues standing in the way, like your back pain, and any number of groups by eating plan or age range. So jump in and get started!

Can't wait to get to know you better!

Hey Olivia! I love your name, so pretty! I'm sorry you're down, but try to use it as that push you need to get started toward a healthy life. Of course it's not just so your husband is more attracted to you, but it is so the two of you can have a fun and healthy life together. And of course so you can keep up with your baby! You can do it, just stick around and absorb all the knowledge and suport that is offered here. :hug:

Welcome Olivia! :D

I'm right around your height/weight at 5'8" and 255. I only started posting here a couple of weeks ago and I love it! It helps immensely just writing stuff here in the different forums and getting 'involved'.

I have a brand new elliptical too and two weeks ago all I could do on it was 2 minutes. I'm happy to say though, that yesterday I did 7 minutes! :D Everything in due time....

Ingrid

Oh, Olivia, I know how you feel. It's so frustrating to just get started, especially if you have the back problem that's getting in the way of exercising like you want to. :(

This website has been so much fun for me, and I find it a great way to avoid snacking -- just come on here and post instead!!

My husband is always telling me he can't wait to see me in a bikini. I tell him, are you a f***** idiot? :doh: I don't even think he's ever seen me below 200#, so what he's thinking, I'll never know. Whatever, the way I see it, he loves me now, he'll love me even more when I feel good about MYSELF, which will never be in a bikini. The most the poor fool can hope for is a MODEST one-piece, probably with a skirt attached! hehehehe ;)

I'm doing this for ME, and hopefully DH and my little girl will get some benefits along the way. I'm sick of worrying about everyone else and taking care of everyone else. This is MY time to do what's best for ME!! And I feel great already! :carrot:

Best of luck to you, and congratulations on those first steps!!! You can do it!!!! :hug:

Don't plan for that after picture. Just plan for tomorrow. That always helps me. Do something a little bit different tomorrow. Change your diet or do something little exercise wise. When you are done with today, plan for the next day.

I so understand about having such inertia about doing anything. Unfortunately the only way to fix it is to do something. Which sucks, but sometimes it helps to just realize that straight on. Then, I can't complain in my head about how hard it is to do anything, I can only complain that I'm not choosing to do anything. That makes it harder to just accept and keep doing nothing.

The other thing that helps is instead of thinking of some goal many months or more down the road, just think about what has to be done each day. There is no way to reach a big goal without doing the baby steps everyday. So I just focus on the day-to-day routine and measure my success by how I do with that, instead of by how far away some distant goal is.

welcome Olivia! and congrats for finally coming out of lurkdom. You have done the right thing by stepping forward and admitting you want to lose weight. Everyone here knows its not an easy or quick process. thats why we stay here and support each other, every step of the way if need be. So keep posting. Make this your new family and you will soon find that you dont feel like your doing this alone but with very close friends beside you.