New Here. Need supporters!
 

7 years ago I weighed 137 lbs. After gaining over 100 lbs, I don't look in the mirror anymore. I don't go anywhere because I am afraid I will run into someone that I havn't seen in a while and I won't be able to handle the shock that they won't express.
I have a lot of excuses for how I got here. They are REALLY good excuses. I had a hysterectomy. I was under stress when my father and my husband died. I quit smoking. The excuses are so good that I can convince myself that they are good reasons if I really want another bowl of ice cream!
So now my health is suffering. I have isolated myself and begun a campaign of self loathing. I need to get healthy and start living my life again.
I hope to find friends here who are focused on the same goals and won't let me use ANY excuse, no matter how legitimate, to fail.
I have been taking Phentermine for 2 months but have only lost 2 lbs. I get discouraged when I don't see results. I sent off for a 1 month supply to start the cookie diet for a jumpstart. I don't see that as along term solution but I really need to see that scale move! Then I will be looking for something that I can really stick to that will give me enough results to stay motivated..but not leave me malnourished!
Would love to hear some success stories!

Hi djay, and welcome! It looks like you do have some mighty fine excuses for the PAST, but you've taken a step in the right direction, and the future starts now. Just take one day at a time, making healthy changes, and you will soon see a difference. Good luck!

Welcome to 3FC! I'm so sorry to hear about your history, but like Auntie G said, it's going to be exciting to work toward a future with ya here!

You mentioned a jump start on dieting, and wanting to see those beginning results fast - have you researched the South Beach Diet? It may be right up your ally.

Whichever path you choose - GOOD LUCK! And hang in there. You're off to a GREAT re-start!

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hey dj, im sorry about your tough year i cant imagine how hard all that must have been and im glad you have come to the decision to live life again. :hug::hug::hug:.
I too got fat on bad times your not alone there.. and im still bigger then you .. lol and shorter too .. but im her and im making a difference to my life .
all i can suggest is start slowly find thngs to do when you feel like binging drink ,lots of water and leave out the calorie laden sodas. Start with just 5 minutes walking a day and slowly build it up soon you will find it easy to do 30 minutes .. and then brig in some other form of exercise maybe a aerobic dvd or some swimming .. and buiol;d that up in the same way as your walking till your doing 20-30 minutes and some walking to walk 6 days a week and then your cardio 1 of those 6 days .. build it up till your doing th crdio 3-4 times a week and walk on the other day apart from one .. give yourself a rest day.. when you exercise you wont really wont the junk.. hy workout to put it all back in junk?? you just dont..
eat good wholesome food .. and fidn a plan that you will find easy to stick to .. im a calories counter and im finding it very good for me .. i consume an average of 1700 cals a day and am losing weight quite well . there are so many different diets on the forums and so much great advice .. find something you know you can fit into your lifestyle and you'll be well oj your way to losing weight.

some one on the other forum i visit, suggested making a binge box write on small pieces of paper things you like doing and things that need to be done.. ie read a book ,watch a movie ,take a long warm bath, write a letter, go for a 5 minutes walk, eat an apple , tidy the top cupboard, brush the dog, play board game with the kids, decorate the binge box, sort out photos albums, scrapbook. get yourself a list of things to do cut up the paper into individual tasks and put it in a box.. .. everytime you feel the urge to binge go to your box and pull out a task instead.. the girl who used this technique lost 86 pounds and has kept it off

wELCOME! You and i sound like we are in similar situations. Sucks, maybe together with all of the other support around us we can over comethis and come out on the other side BETTER!

I too can relate to the overweight & self loathing
you can change this & love your self again
& regain your confidence

GOod luck with your weight loss journey

Sounds like you may need more than a diet. Have you had any support through your tough times? Have you considered counselling? I'm concerned that no diet or exercise regime is going to help you until you regain some self esteem which in turn will fuel your efforts to lose weight. The good people here can help to some degree but empathy from RL humans would help even more.

auntieg,
Thank you for the welome and kind words. I hope this helps keep me on track.
No good excuses for falure. Only good reasons to succeed!
D

I have not researched the South Beach Diet. Is it a lot of work and planning? I'm afraid if I have to do a lot of planning and cooking, I will give up. I hope as the weight comes off , I will have more energy. But would like to know more about it.

Amy,
Thank you very much. That is some good advice. I especially like the Binge box idea. Binging when I am board is a huge diet buster...Not to mention what it does to my self esteem.
I did weight watchers a couple of years ago. Maybe I wasn't ready at the time. I had a hard time with the calorie counting. I think I need alot of structure right now. Maybe I'll try calorie counting whenI am getting closer to a weight that I want to maintain since it will be the only way to eat in the real world. I will make sure and get with you when that happens for more advice! You seem like a pro already. I'm sure you will pass me up soon!
D

Hi djay! I'm new here too. I hope you'll find lots of support and encouragement here.

I know I can relate to a lot of the things you said, about making excuses, and about not doing things for fear of seeing someone you used to know. It's no way to go through life, being afraid to meet people from your past - I know I don't want to live that way anymore!

Here's to all the new friends you can make here, and to getting yourself back to where you can connect with your old friends too. We all need all the friendship and support we can get! Welcome!

Carol

I'm sure we CAN do this...look how many have...we can work on it together! Have you picked a diet plan? How did you do today?
I did o.k.. Went out to dinner with my daughter. I was pretty proud of myself that I ordered a salad and was satisfied. Still wanted something sweet afterward though. I skipped the pie at the resuraunt and came home and ate a 100 calorie ice cream bar when I got home...so all in all I think I did ok.

Thank you for the support Thin Nurse. How have you been doing. Does this board help you stay on track?
D

I have had some support from family and friends. If I start having feelings that are not based in reality I will certainly go to counseling. I have had a rough time and made some bad choices about how to make myself feel better and I agree that my self esteem has taken a beating. I think the best way to address that is to relearn what will make me feel better...and it isn't a package of cookie dough!

Thanks for the encouragement Carol. I KNOW we can do this. We will be out tracking down old friends soon.
NO EXCUSES! for failure
only REASONS for success!
I felt good about today. I went out to dinner and didn't blow it! I ordered a salad so I didn't come here and make excuses!
How did you do? Keep in touch and let's rock this weight loss thing!
D

Good attitude djay! I went through a really bad time a few years ago and my self esteem hit the ground. I started to rebuild it by going back to basics, taking time with personal grooming each day, buying and wearing nice clothes, looking as good as possible. These things began to have an effect on my self esteem and I was able to continue the process by starting to eat healthy foods and exercise each day.

Sounds like you are dealing with esteem well, I'm sure that will continue as you get support from the peeps here.

Hi Djay,

I just joined myself yesterday, so hearing your story gives me hope that we can do this together. I need all the support too that I can get myself. This is a good time for us to start caring for ourselves and get a new optimism. Having been in a depression since my now ex-husband left me in 2004, my heart goes out to you after losing both your father and your husband. If there's anything I can do to help, let me know.

Good for you! How was today? I'm doing OK too. A little nervous about the next two days, as I'm going out to lunch with a friend tomorrow, and dinner with another friend on Thursday. Those will be my first sit-down restaurant meals since I've started. But I think I can handle it!! Luckily they are both good people, and I think they will encourage me once they know I'm trying.

That's the good thing about this forum: all the genuine friendly support. It really helps. Have you told people around you in "real life" about your dieting? I've only told a handful, but that has been helpful too.

Carol

Hi Carol,
I havn't told any one yet except this forum. I have said so many times that I needed to lose weight and havn't done it so I quit saying it. I would love for people to just notice one day.
I know you can make the right choices at lunch tomorrow and that will give you the confidence to do the same when you go out to dinner. I hope you will let me know tomorrow how you did. I would love to celebrate such a big success with you!
D

Thanks for asking. I did OK! I ordered a salad, and that's all I ate, even though that bread kept calling my name! How about you? How'd you make out today?

I'm finding now that the more people I tell, the more motivated I am to stick with it. Makes it seem more "real" somehow.

Tomorrow will be a late night for me, so we'll see how that goes.

Hi Carol,
I think maybe you are doing the right thing by telling every one. I don't want to embarassed if I fail, so I havn't been telling people. Maybe this approach is giving me permission to fail. I didn't do well today and I am struggling to leave it there and nort make it worse tonight just because I already messed up today.
I'm really glad to hear about your success! I had 15 minutes of satisfaction and feel terrible for the rest of the night. You spent a few minutes doing the right thing for yourself and get to feel good all evening! You are my inspiration for tomorrow. I want to get that proud feeling back too!
D

Djay, it sounds to me like you are doing well despite all the trouble you've had. Learning to love salad has got to be a good start! Best of luck for your weight loss.

You can do it Djay! Take baby steps if you have to...I feel like the more steps I take, even to just think about a single ingredient...it starts you thinking in a different way.

One thing that's been helpful to me is looking at the steps involved in something I saw on Oprah a few weeks ago. It's not a "diet plan" exactly, but a "lifestyle change" plan. Here's the link: http://www.thebestlife.com/ms/mvchal...m_welcome.html

I have gone back a few times and looked at the steps, and I find myself doing more and more of them every few days without even fully realizing it.

Yesterday I knew I was going out to dinner, so I only had some fruit salad for lunch and a small snack in the afternoon. But I didn't go nuts at dinner. I had a pretty sensible and healthy meal. Probably a few more calories than I would have had at home on my plan, but I didn't worry about it because I knew it was nothing "bad" for me, plus I'd even planned for it. And when my friend (who is eight months pregnant and supposed to be gaining a bit more weight per her doctor) asked if I wanted any desert, I said I would have a taste of whatever she ordered. And that's what I did. I had a forkul of the most delicious thing ever (in the past, I've eaten this particular item at this restaurant many times by myself!). You know what? I actually felt really satisfied, because I'd HAD that taste of something so good, but I was still able to be really proud of myself for not going overboard. I would not have been able to do that even a week or two ago.

I'm honestly feeling more confident every day. Just start slow..make one change here, one change there. We'll all help you in any way we can!!