This thread is wonderful. From my experience, I can't imagine not having food tied to emotions. It's the way I ate ever since I was a young child. And being carb addicted, it just is a trap, as we know.

As to self esteem, I've had that issue from my childhood too. It's something I've struggled with in my adult life, even when things were going well. I wish there were a magic pill for it, but I still struggle with it, especially in times of stress.

Oh, I was listening to a song last night, and one of the lines was, "Don't let fear decide your fate." I wanted to tattoo that on my heart.

Anyhow, thanks for this thread!

It IS newfound confidence! You love/cherish yourself more...and people are drawn to those who know their own self worth (different from vain and egocentric). I LOVED the trip over the carpet story - you go girl!:cp:

You ARE strong enough. Remind yourself that it is an ongoing process...a reinventing of YOU! I absolutely hear you about not using alcohol as a backup. One of the other things about this diet....
NONE OF US ARE CRAZY - KETOGENIC DIETS INCREASE CORTISOL PRODUCTION!!!

Cortisol is the "stress hormone," and if you are feeling extra-anxious, extra-reactive....some of that could be increased cortisol (& decreased serotonin - especially in us "carb junkies"). I went through a phase about a month ago where I had to do a LOT of deep breathing because everything was setting me off. Look up "square breathing" - it's a technique that really works!

I think it is a work in progress. A good friend and I work on those "negative tapes" we play in our own heads. I also created a "mantra" (or daily affirmation) for myself because I was having so much trouble getting below 200 lbs...it hangs on my bulliten board at work and I say it out loud to myself when I feel "weak."

Starshine (love the username!), I love your quote idea. If I did it right, there is a jpeg of one of my fav quotes attached to this post.

I come from a HUGE (lots of loud, vibrant, obese people) Polish family. The way my Grandmother used to greet guests is "Djeetyet?!" (That's North Jersey speak for "Did you eat yet?") - Food was love & comfort, holiday festivities revolved around traditional Polish food! One of my earliest memories is that when I was good in church, my grandmother would buy me one of those little Debbie style brownies as a reward. Stained glass & little Debbie baby! As adults, our job is to LOVE OURSELVES in other ways...whether it is crafts, spending quiet time with friends who bring out the best in us, seeking support on 3FC, singing in a choir...you get my drift.

Treat yourself with love & respect today Ladies (& Gentlemen if you are lurking)!
:grouphug: Love & Hugs!
Amy

Glad you like my name! :) And that quote too (I've read signature quote many times! :) ). With the self esteem issues, fear is a huge part. And so that quote just struck me hard, and I thought, boy, I have to listen to more of this group's songs. :)

And I agree about those negative tapes in our heads. As much as I know I'm not stupid, etc., it still is a thought that pops up when I make a mistake/do something wrong. It was just so drilled into my head that even after decades, it's still something I have to deal with.

I also find that when life is going well, the past doesn't bother me as much, but when life is throwing me curve balls (like it has the past years), I get bothered by the past, and eating carbs out of control makes it that much worse.

Food was used in my family for celebrations too. And as a reward system also. It's part of my happiest memories. But then also, my family situation was one where you just shut your mouth and weren't supposed to talk back (although we all did at points), and there was abuse in my situation also, so my way to feel better was to eat. I didn't know how to deal with all those feelings I had inside, so I just ate them away. It was the only way I could cope.

But of course, as an adult, eating doesn't work like that. And after doing that for years, it just was like, "NO MORE," and here I am on IP. Hoping this system can help me deal with those issues, and get control of those eating issues.

Again, this is an important thread. Losing weight isn't just about losing the weight. :)

Glad there is some explanation for it :) I will look up square breathing :hug:

I am so glad this post is here. So many things here pertain to me. Emotional and boredom eating. Self sabotaging, (I am at an old WW goal that I was .6 away from, and didnt hit last week +2 :cry:). The emotions going on now that I am losing, for real-I feel- for the first time. Frustrations at nothing really, I recently found out on here about the cortisol- that actually made me feel so much better, there was a reason!- hallelujah! I will look into the breathing thing!
I will be keeping track of this thread also, it really has great emotional benefits and I love the input from people who have really been there and\or are going through it too.- THANK YOU!
~My~the newbie!

I totally understand your fear of gaining back the weight. When others say they can do this with such assuredness, my mind still isn't convinced I can get this weight off and keep it off, even though that's what I want to do. I'm staying 100% with no cheats, and except for crappy Vegetarian protein options, this diet is easy for me.

I don't know about those support groups. I hope someone can give you advice.

What I've started doing is reading the maintenance thread. The people there aren't perfect, and they gain and lose and they adapt the program to fit their needs. It really is an inspiration, and it gives me hope that I too can do that. I think it would be good to stay on this board too, as there is a lot of support here.

Good luck!

I think staying connected to these IP boards will be a huge source of support from "like minded" individuals who've done IP. Years ago I attended OA meetings...actually, I went on and off for years. The last time I went, I did not find the meetings as helpful,,it was more a social meeting and time for a lot of negativity. It was also not as supportive, as unlike the OA meetings in the late 60's, the food plan isn't structured..one can do their own thing. I think I will stick to these boards and do a monthly weigh in at my IP health center.

I also understand your annoyance when people compliment your wt loss efforts. It gives me an uneasy feelings as I can't help but wonder are they thinking "here she goes again..wonder how long she'll keep it off this time?"
I decided after reading some of the posts here early on, that I was just going to take it one day at a time, stay focused on eating 100% OP, and trust the process. I believe it was wuv who said "Nothing tastes as good as thin feels". This has become my mantra.

I've discovered that I eat to reward myself. I teach and had conferences today so my official day was 8AM to 8PM, plus getting my normal things done before and after that. On my way home I finished the last half of my IPChocolate ball things (it's been a long day) and I was thinking that I should just have a IP bar when I got home because I deserve it and it's better for me than the chocolate that I didn't eat in the lounge. Then I decided that I deserve to have a good WI tomorrow instead. One step at a time, one choice at a time. Maybe I can change my thinking after all!! :)

Hang in there LoriKay..the chocolate bar would be ingested before you know it and then the regrets will follow. The candy will be there when you've reached your goal..and who knows, it may not have the appeal that it has now.

Bumping this thread. Stumbled across it this morning and found so much helpful advice!

Thanks for bumping the board. This board was very helpful to read.

I have done OA. Even though I only attended meetings for two weeks, I knew I found a place with people with the same issues and addictions as me. Once I finally start IP I think I will try and start attending those meetings again. I would recommend to anyone who believes they have an addiction to food (overeating, emotional eating etc) to find a meeting and attend a couple.

I wanted to go see a therapist about the emotional aspects of my overeating, but wherever I called no doctors were accepting new paitents. OA is free with the exception of a donation each week (I donated $1) because they are "self supporting."

I hope this board can remain active because I know there are MANY of us that are struggling with the same food emotional issues.

Thanks Gazelle! I've read through this thread earlier in my IP journey, but it was good to do it again now that I'm on a small reboot. I hope others who are struggling see it too. Such great advice :)

I am just three weeks in but I have thought about how it will feel to get more attention based on my appearance and how I will handle it after being heavy for such a long time. I had resolved to start seeing a counselor as soon as I felt the first twinges of fear. I also looked up where the OA meetings are and there is one very close to me! I could bike to it (exercise and support -- win-win).

So glad to see I'm not alone. I never really thought I was an emotional eater - sure I ate when I was happy, sad, angry, etc. - but I was usually physically hungry. I have always been "the fat one". In my family, among my friends, at work, that's my roll-"the fat one". In high school I was a size 8 but my sister and friends were all size 0 or 2. My sister always told me how fat I was and if you hear it enough you believe it. So for as long as I can remember I have been on a diet - lose some weight and gain back more than I lost. 5 years ago I did Nutrisystem with Phentermine and got down to 170. Even at that weight, I was still the fat one, as most in my family have never been over 140. So I guess in my head I decided if inward the fat one at 170 or 270 it didn't matter.

This past year has been one of the hardest in my life. I had a nervous breakdown and have been going to therapy every other week. I've learned a lot about myself. I realized that I was holding in all of my emotions - that's what I was taught, act like everything is fine- and I was stuffing them down with food. Once my therapist helped me learn to FEEL my feelings and let them out I was no longer physically hungry unless I was actually Hungry!

That's what helped motivate me to start IP. I feel like I've dealt with the emotional side and now I'm ready to lose the weight. Even at my goal of 150, I will still be the fat one among most in my life but I will be better equipped to deal with those feelings. And who knows maybe I will get there and realize I can go further and not be the fat one anymore.