I had this problem, initially, at work. My lunch, every day, became everyone's business. Then, when my weight loss started to show, that became the subject of criticism. Finally, I just sat every one down and said that I need support, not opinions. If I wanted opinions, I would ask. I then told them all that I appreciate that they care, but that no one cares more about my body and health than me and my coach. After that, I heard nothing but positive compliments.
I think when you get closer to a normal weight people get nervous that you are going to go overboard and develop an eating disorder.
I had the same experience with my brothers and sister and with co-workers this month.
No one seems to remember how big I was. The other evening a group of colleagues took me out for a birthday dinner. It was supposed to be a retirement celebration but a dear friend and coworker has been diagnosed with breast cancer and I told her I will keep working until she can come back so everything stays the same for her in the job,
My coworkers have watched me bring my own lunch of salad and chicken every time lunch is provided for us. We are totally overworked with many meetings scheduled for what should be our lunch break. To make up for this they bring in lunch which is truckloads of carb laden crap.
On my birthday get together I declined wine and ordered a very nice grilled chicken salad and split a dessert with someone. It was Olive Garden and everyone else had pasta and the bread basket.
When I was leaving one person said she was speaking for everyone and they were concerned about how much weight I was losing and wanted to ask me not to lose more. This is the same thing my family said when I was back east at the beginning of the month. I told them I was maintaining and let it go at that.
I knew why they were concerned; last year a coworker who was retiring and not overweight went on a fitness kick and diet to lose 30 pounds for her daughter's wedding and looks awful.
When i came home I sent everyone in the group an email with my progress pictures attached. I told them my journey has been different than many people's because I was obese as a child and I will always be a "closet" obese person. I said I was now at the high end of the average range for my height and age. I told them I would never be able to eat the way someone else of that height and weight and has never been obese can eat.
The first picture shows me 10 years ago on the right with my mom. I was 205 at 5"1". Shortly after that I realized I could not handle wheat and had energy for the first time in my 55 years. For that reason I will never take partake of the supplied lunches.
The middle picture is 5 years ago at 189. My doctor had just told me he was sending me to a specialist to look at a knee replacement. I asked him to wait till I tried to get more weight off. In that time I yo-yoed up and down with low carb plans.
I finally got the latest 35 pounds of this year with IP.
I got several responses. One from my secretary who is the same height as me but keeps her weight at 120 with daily walking. She said I was being too strict with myself as I am the same fine person when I am heavy or not. I emailed her back and told her I appreciated the thought but actually my knee and my doctor think I am a much healthier person at my current weight.
Two people emailed back and thanked me for showing them it was not impossible to get weight off after menopause which is incredibly difficult. One of them said from now on she would look at menus and ask herself "what would Pat order".
Several people didn't respond at all.
Sorry for the long post. The topic of other people being so concerned with what one eats never seems to go away and made me think of my experience this week.
Pat
You look tremendous. And you are physically and MENTALLY healthy! Good for you!
Hey all, I am back! The Meatza turned out phenomenal, tomorrow will show whether the cheese was epicly bad or just a "special treat" kind of scenario. It was a total of 5g carbs per serving (1/2 a pizza) with 8oz ground beef/italian sausage (beef was 93/7), mushrooms, tomatoes, green peppers, onion, and turkey pepperoni. I used a no name brand pizza cheese that was lower in fat than a few alternatives, 4g per serving. As i'm not counting fat strictly it wasn't a huge problem for me, just getting past the "i'm a rebel i'm a rebel" mantra playing in my head.
For whoever was asking about the recipe book, I am almost past the first "group" of recipes in the archive, on my home computer at least, but I can't create a table of contents on my Mac (limitation of MS Word for Mac), so I stopped making it at home and started making it at work. Unfortunately I don't get quite as much time to work on it, as I do have to still do my job (dramatic sigh) but some day, hoping by the end of summer, I'll have it up and running and it will be epic!
Thanks Delgen! I have noticed that since Day 1 on IP, I am MOST VERY LIKELY to tell anyone and everyone the truth-whether they want to hear it or not. Sometimes I have gasped at my own truthful comments to the people in my life. Most of my family and friends have figured this out! (HeHe)
Had a great day with DH and went to the Seattle Pinball Museum and played all afternoon went to the big Uwajimaya store and then took the light rail home.... all in all a great 100% OP Day. Drank a ton of water and had my restricted for the week. Fun had by both DH and myself. He let me know this morning that because I don't allow any crap in the house: candy, ice cream... shreaded cheese chips exct... that he has lost 10 lbs just by chance of not eating bad stuff. That's pretty exciting for me.
I have fajitas, green peppers and onions cooking in the actifry and the cracker recipe made into 2 tostadas in the oven. Was going to bake a bunch more, but will see how ambitious I am after these things are done. I did chop and slice enough fajitas, peppers and onion for 2 more meals. I am looking forward to trying the mug cake and the cookies.
Ohhhh!!! I am so mad!!!( see my mad face?) I just got over TOM two weeks ago and now its back again!!!!! GRRRRRRRRRR!!! Why must we be punished twice in one month!! Why(shakes fists at the sky!!) At least that explains the bloating and not so big loss this week again..
I have been majorly struggling while away ata conference. Find food options has been really tough, despite supplementing food in my hotel room. What is with everyone thinking that iceberg lettuce and cheese is a salad?
Anyway, the pressures of finding appropriate food while networking at a conference create a roller coaster of emotions. For most meals now, I end up devastated and want to give up. Then, I eat appropriately and feel amazing pride! I wish I could remember that victorious feeling when I feel so low.
It's good to read the posts about eating around others. Ithas become my biggest struggle and I can relate.
Ohhhh!!! I am so mad!!!( see my mad face?) I just got over TOM two weeks ago and now its back again!!!!! GRRRRRRRRRR!!! Why must we be punished twice in one month!! Why(shakes fists at the sky!!) At least that explains the bloating and not so big loss this week again..
That happened to me after my 1st month OP but it settles down after a cycle or two 😊
Hi everyone,
I hope you are all having a great weekend. Lots going on in IP land. I just finished packing for our trip to Blacksburg, VA for my son's freshman orientation at Virginia Tech. I'm so excited for him.
I have my IP bag packed, bought a case of water and paid for me and hubby to eat in the cafeteria too. I know the salad bar will be great for me.
I will be missing my weigh in this week, but will do my own spot check before we leave. Today i saw a glimpse of the 140's! OK - it was 149.8, i had already pee'd twice and I was naked..but still - I SAW THAT NUMBER START WITH 14! keeps me motivated ya know?
Good luck with WI's, surgery, road trips, BBQ's, clueless co workers and upcoming parties!
and as always, thanks for being here.
Renee
Renee,
I also saw the 140's for thi first time in a long time, so exciting. Congrats on your son getting into VT, my husband went there.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaypix
Hey all, I am back! The Meatza turned out phenomenal, tomorrow will show whether the cheese was epicly bad or just a "special treat" kind of scenario. It was a total of 5g carbs per serving (1/2 a pizza) with 8oz ground beef/italian sausage (beef was 93/7), mushrooms, tomatoes, green peppers, onion, and turkey pepperoni. I used a no name brand pizza cheese that was lower in fat than a few alternatives, 4g per serving. As i'm not counting fat strictly it wasn't a huge problem for me, just getting past the "i'm a rebel i'm a rebel" mantra playing in my head.
For whoever was asking about the recipe book, I am almost past the first "group" of recipes in the archive, on my home computer at least, but I can't create a table of contents on my Mac (limitation of MS Word for Mac), so I stopped making it at home and started making it at work. Unfortunately I don't get quite as much time to work on it, as I do have to still do my job (dramatic sigh) but some day, hoping by the end of summer, I'll have it up and running and it will be epic!
