... a thread of quiet encouragement and calm sharing about healing our body-hate-craziness.
I've been away for a bit from this forum so maybe I'm hypersensitive to this. I sometimes get weepy reading a post -- people so determined to do what they've always done even if it's never produced the result they want -- and my heart breaks a little when it seems as if they can't/won't let go to try another way. Or transferring that focus about what's wrong with their body to a possible obsession about some minor aspect of the Ideal Protein experience. Addictive personality, Rosemary will probably tell us
I'm not referring to any post in particular, I see myself in those behaviours too. It seems to be a way of thinking that takes over with varying intensity and duration, but touches many who post here.
So many of us have struggled for so long with our weight, body issues, and health concerns that we can't let go of what we've said to ourselves for years -- "My body is ..." "I am ..." "I have to ..." It's fine that we've said (and listened ) to this. However, they're opinions and random thoughts not THE truth.
Listening to these thoughts have led us to judge our bodies harshly (often at weights we'd love to get down to!), try punishing, nonsense diets possibly while exhausting ourselves with long fruitless exercise sessions. Me too!
I feel as if I created (or found?) peace of mind while on Ideal Protein. Ideal Protein is such a simple diet. It put me quickly in touch with what wasn't working about how I had been eating (FYI: total carb queen).
An NSV I haven't shared here: ScooterMan (my fiancé) told me that 'You're sexier now, well you were always sexy, but your sexier now because YOU like your body." This is approximately the same sized body that I used to think was fat and ugly 15-20 years ago and that no man would ever really be attracted to. (sorry, moment of vulgarity coming ... WTF was I thinking or seeing??) alright that wasn't so quiet or calm.
I can't say that I've mastered staring down my poison/drug/temptation, or stopping at one once I've started. What my time on IP has taught me is that if I can't say no to that stuff, then something else is off with what I'm eating. All that happened was I ate food that didn't nourish and support me for a time. (And that's what happened over 15 years to get to the point where I related to a site called 3fatchicks) Nothing is wrong with me ... Not my body, not my brain, not my character. I just ate in a way that doesn't support me and need to start eating in way that does work. Nothing is wrong with me .. not my body, not my brain, not my character. ... Or yours.
Your thoughts?
Last edited by I'm svelting!; 01-05-2011 at 09:53 PM.
Preach it Holly! An excellent, well-timed post that I think that we all need to hear. Our bodies are amazing things and while sometimes I can't believe that I'm finally losing the weight that I thought I would have forever, it's as though my body has just been waiting for my head to realize that WE CAN DO THIS!
You said that very well. Encouraging and positive.
It doesn't matter if you have 10 pounds to lose or 100 pounds to lose, in my experience, I find that as soon as you are out of your comfort zone weight wise, you begin to condemn yourself, even to the point where you give up. Me myself had the same WTF attitude. Even though I never passed the 200 pound marker, I was far bigger than I had ever been, and unable to fit any of my clothes. Many of the threads bring me to tears, cause I tried relentlessly without success, and have also found this new peace of mind with IP.
I am thankful to have the support that I have found here, and the encouragement of my family.
Awesome post I'm svelting.
Svelting's post is probably one of the most important ones that anyone can read on this journey we're all on together.
I've come up with a few mantras along the way, and it's not always easy, by any means, but let me pose this question: If we truly loved ourselves, would we punish ourselves with an unhealthy lifestyle, unhealthy food? Would we intentionally put ourselves in harm's way? Is that what we would do to the ones we love?
Sometimes it's just a matter of educating ourselves and then implementing what's best for us.
I can so relate to Svelting, because I remember being 120 pounds in college and feeling obese....lol. (and not to mention unloveable and unworthy). Now at nearly 170, (and 49 years old), I don't feel that way anymore. My desire and my goal is to be at a healthy weight for me, and I am so happy I found this forum, because for me it's the answer. It suits my lifestyle, it offers a great support system and, not to mention, it works!
I was always filled with self-doubt, never believing in myself, whether it was weight loss, my parenting abilities, my work, it didn't matter. Looking back at things, I have two awesome teenage sons, a great career, lots of friends .....all in all, not too bad.
Every day I have gratitude for what I have, and that brings me peace.
I believe each and every one of you can do this and reach your goals and feel amazing inside and out. Now I'm beginning to believe it can work for me, too!
I'm svelting!.. this is exactly the post I would've written if I could've found the words... I'm so glad you found the words & shared them so beautifully!.. I had been noticing of late some hints that some of us were approaching IP as a kind of punishment, when instead we should be welcoming it as a renewing of our TRUE SELVES!.. I'm not leaving myself out of that group, I really felt "punished" over the holidays... I'm glad to get this reminder that I'm worth this wonderful change in my body, in my eating style, in my life...
A good article I found a month or so ago says that the number one reason most of us can't lose weight is because we "don’t have the confidence to do so. [Our] self-esteem is injured… especially if [we’ve] tried and failed to lose weight multiple times in the past."
So true in my case, especially over the past 2 or 3 years...
Your recollections of 15-20 years ago when you thought no man would want you at your weight brought back some memories for me... only, my problem was sorta the opposite... 20 years ago, I had a great body & several men in my life (not bragging!).. the last relationship, though, was such a disaster, I was certain I didn't want to go through that ever again, so I started gaining weight to keep the men away... & it worked like a charm for many years... my original motivation to start IP & lose weight wasn't to attract men, but now it's kinda fun to get checked out when I'm out & about town...
Thank you so much, kiddo, for your wonderful post, & to everybody else who has shared their thoughts & experiences here... I feel a renewed resolve to get this done right...
hugs
Last edited by Aunt Sheshie; 01-06-2011 at 12:28 PM.
[QUOTE=newton;3636501]
I can so relate to Svelting, because I remember being 120 pounds in college and feeling obese....lol. (and not to mention unloveable and unworthy). Now at nearly 170, (and 49 years old), I don't feel that way anymore. My desire and my goal is to be at a healthy weight for me, and I am so happy I found this forum, because for me it's the answer. It suits my lifestyle, it offers a great support system and, not to mention, it works!
I can relate to this. I use to see myself fat all the time even at 125, 20 years ago. I hated to see pictures of me. Now at 47 and 143 pounds I see a healthy and skinnier me. This program has changed my life in many ways. I love my body!!
I was certain I didn't want to go through that ever again, so I started gaining weight to keep the men away... & it worked like a charm for many years...
hugs
Fat really is a feminist issue, isn't it? But I think there's a male equivalent, too. I'm with you both, all the way.
... a thread of quiet encouragement and calm sharing about healing our body-hate-craziness.
I've been away for a bit from this forum so maybe I'm hypersensitive to this. I sometimes get weepy reading a post -- people so determined to do what they've always done even if it's never produced the result they want -- and my heart breaks a little when it seems as if they can't/won't let go to try another way. Or transferring that focus about what's wrong with their body to a possible obsession about some minor aspect of the Ideal Protein experience. Addictive personality, Rosemary will probably tell us
I'm not referring to any post in particular, I see myself in those behaviours too. It seems to be a way of thinking that takes over with varying intensity and duration, but touches many who post here.
So many of us have struggled for so long with our weight, body issues, and health concerns that we can't let go of what we've said to ourselves for years -- "My body is ..." "I am ..." "I have to ..." It's fine that we've said (and listened ) to this. However, they're opinions and random thoughts not THE truth.
Listening to these thoughts have led us to judge our bodies harshly (often at weights we'd love to get down to!), try punishing, nonsense diets possibly while exhausting ourselves with long fruitless exercise sessions. Me too!
I feel as if I created (or found?) peace of mind while on Ideal Protein. Ideal Protein is such a simple diet. It put me quickly in touch with what wasn't working about how I had been eating (FYI: total carb queen).
An NSV I haven't shared here: ScooterMan (my fiancé) told me that 'You're sexier now, well you were always sexy, but your sexier now because YOU like your body." This is approximately the same sized body that I used to think was fat and ugly 15-20 years ago and that no man would ever really be attracted to. (sorry, moment of vulgarity coming ... WTF was I thinking or seeing??) alright that wasn't so quiet or calm.
I can't say that I've mastered staring down my poison/drug/temptation, or stopping at one once I've started. What my time on IP has taught me is that if I can't say no to that stuff, then something else is off with what I'm eating. All that happened was I ate food that didn't nourish and support me for a time. (And that's what happened over 15 years to get to the point where I related to a site called 3fatchicks) Nothing is wrong with me ... Not my body, not my brain, not my character. I just ate in a way that doesn't support me and need to start eating in way that does work. Nothing is wrong with me .. not my body, not my brain, not my character. ... Or yours.
This really put into words what I felt today. I tend to have minor victories then get super anxious. I had some really awful experiences with my ex-husband, and with another man while I was in high school. Since then, I've steadily gained weight, keeping men away. Now that I've dealt with my deeper issues of why I eat, I'm ready to lose this weight for me and my children. I can't begin to fathom the misery my babies would go through if I died early from not taking care of myself and they had to live with my ex. (well, I can, and that's why I won't allow it).
One other problem...comparison...we always compare ourselves to others, our old selves, whatever. We can only be what we are at the moment...forgive ourselves for any mistakes and move forward.
I have wasted so much of my life beating myself up for what I should have done different (usually gaining weight).
Your body is not your enemy
) to this. However, they're opinions and random thoughts not THE truth.
