Originally Posted by Autumn Night

There is no easy way. There is no easy way. Say it again, and again, until you believe it. What you weigh is a combination of what goes in your mouth and out of your body as physical effort. It isn't easy, but it is knowledge that will last you a lifetime. It also doesn't matter how long it takes, as long as you keep going in the right direction.

Some people want the weight to come off as fast as possible. Personally, I think that what the scale says five, ten, or forty years from now is a lot more important than what it says a month from now. And don't forget, your health is gauged by a lot more than just a number on the scale. Skinny people can be unhealthy, too.

Originally Posted by LovesBassets

This whole weight loss thing has been 100% mental for me, too, and (like I said) my trainer has REALLY helped me shift my attitude and entire way of thinking about food, exercise, body fat, etc.

A couple of the biggest and best tips she's given me:

1. It's NOT about a number on a scale. It's about how your clothing fits.
2. Protein, protein, protein. Aim for 100 - 140 grams a day.
3. Be consistent. No excuses. If your goal is exercise 3 days a week, DO IT.

One thing she's really good at is asking great "why" questions when I have a complaint, comment, confession, etc. She's now gotten into my head (so to speak), so when I try to talk myself out of exercise or into a cookie, her "why" pops into my head. Example: if I eat something I really shouldn't have and vent to her about it, she says, "Why'd you eat it?" which makes me really think about it...and the answer is usually boredom, stress, or being tired. Then she'll say, "The next time you reach for something to eat, first ask yourself if you're actually hungry. If you're NOT hungry, ask yourself WHY you want to eat it." It's the same thing with exercise. Cardio, actually, which I despise. I was at the gym Friday and DID NOT want to get on the elliptical. I said to her, "I don't think I'll do cardio today." She said (of course), "Why?" I think I snorted and said, "I don't want to." She looked at me and said, "What DO you want?" LOL...and I said, "to be 135 lbs." So I solved that one on my own and got on the darn elliptical :D. She's just so fabulous about asking just the right questions at the right time to get me thinking about things...I hope that makes sense.

We also talk a lot about why I was heavy to begin with. And again, it's all about the "why" questions: Why did I gain 50 lbs in college? What was is about college that made me eat so much? Why do I hate vegetables and chicken and CRAVE pasta? Why did I never try to lose weight before? Why did I gain another 30 lbs while I was a teacher?

I won't bore you with all the answers to those questions about me, but I WILL tell you that by breaking down my entire life into little sections -- looking at the times when I gained weight, etc., her questions really helped me focus in on the fact that for me stress + depression = self-medication with food + weight gain. I never made that connection before, but she could see it as an objective observer simply by saying, "Why did you gain 30 lbs as a teacher?" and then listening to me babble on and on during our weight session about the correcting, the parents, the administration, and the sheer EXHAUSTION of dealing with 7th graders all day every day...

As I write this, I'm thinking now that these might be good questions to ask YOURSELF and maybe put down into journal form.

She also asks questions like, "When in your life did you feel MOST healthy?" and then of course, "Why? What was happening in your life then that was different?" And looking back at those healthier times in my life has taught me a lot about what I need in my life to BE healthy. If that makes sense...which it probably doesn't...LOL.

ANYWAY...

She also gave me a whole new perspective on the purpose of food. Which sounds mighty moronic, I know. But for me, food was either (a) bad for you but yummy, (b) good for you but disgusting, or (c) a good, loyal friend on a lonely Saturday night :p . And despite middle school health class, etc. I never *got* the fact that food is fuel. Food was something my mother never ate (she was anorexic), something my father OVER-ate (he was obese), and something I never learned how to prepare beyond the boil-water-insert-macaroni level. But when I first started out and she had me doing food logs, she went over absolutely everything I was and WASN'T eating. So I learned that my desperate need to sleep every day at 3pm was linked to the fact that all I ever ate was carbs. Etc...

I hope I answered your question, Robin...I fear I may have started babbling BIG TIME!!! As usual. :dizzy:

Originally Posted by LovesBassets

To continue on with the food is fuel concept...

I used to drink something like 4 - 5 cans of regular Coke a day. And mentally I *thought* I needed it. Like I said, I was a teacher, and somehow I'd convinced myself that I needed the caffeine infusion all day -- 2nd period, 4th period, lunch, faculty meeting, the drive home, etc. When I started seeing my trainer, she said, "How many calories are in one can of Coke?" And LOL...I had no idea. And she taught me a concept that was utterly new to me: "empty calories." Being a nutritional disaster area, I'd never heard of that before. Once I realized I was taking in 500 - 1000 extra, useless, empty calories a day I was like "whoah!" and then took her previous advice to cut back.

I've always known what was "right" as far as food, but I never really understood the WHY -- the MATH behind it.

I also drink a ton of tea, usually in HUGE (10 - 12 oz) mugs...and I never thought about the 3 tablespoons of sugar I used to put in each mug. It makes me sound like an idiot, but I was chugging down hundreds of extra calories a day without even thinking about it...until she pointed it out. Again, she'd already suggested Splenda instead of sugar, but to me it was all about the TASTE of my tea. I think I said something like "no one messes with my tea" :dizzy: . But then she showed me the math. And it clicked.

She also emphasized something that a lot of 3FCers say all the time: BABY STEPS. If you try to change everything all at once, you're setting yourself up for failure. So I cut DOWN on the Coke -- I didn't quit cold turkey. I switched to Splenda. I started reading the nutritional labels on food. She taught me that carbs are basically sugar and that protein goes (practically) straight to your muscles.

I also thought you *had* to lose weight before you started weight training. For some reason I had always thought of the "get toned" process as something for thin people. I didn't know muscle burns calories at rest. I didn't know cardio only was only part of the exercise equation.

MOST importantly, I didn't think I could lose weight. I thought it was 100% GENETIC and that I was destined to be fat forever. My biological mother weighs probably 350 - 400 lbs. She needs a scooter to get around because she is so heavy. And I accepted obesity as my fate. After all, I'd ALWAYS been heavy (or so I thought). How could I possibly lose weight when I hadn't ever been thin? I didn't know what thin WAS.

But slowly....very slowly...she helped me to understand that it WAS possible. That I could do it -- anyone could do it with the right nutritional understanding, perserverence, commitment, consistency, and (most importantly) MINDSET. You have to believe you can do it. You have to tell the negative, self-defeating voice in your head to SHUT UP. And this was probably the hardest thing for me. But as long as you believe in yourself, if you trust the process despite the inevitable set-backs and occasional failures you CAN succeed. And it's easy for me to say that, but unbelievably difficult to put into action.

And the last thing I want to say is something that I wish I could shout from the rooftops: getting fit and healthy CAN change your life. When I complained about my weight in the past, friends would say "being thin won't change your life, Kate. You have to learn to be happy with yourself no matter what size you are." And while that's true on one level, I have to say that (for ME, at least) my life has improved 500% since I started losing weight. Telling my self I COULD do it -- and then seeing progress -- taught me I could do lots of OTHER things, too. I quit teaching, sold my house, and moved to the UK for a year to work on my dream of being a published writer. The old, fat, depressed and self-defeating Kate NEVER would have done that...but the confidence I gained by taking control of my life trickled into other parts of my life. I'm now back in school. I've started a new career that I LOVE. And (the best part) is that some of my writing IS published.

So I guess my (very long-winded :dizzy: ) point is that you have to have faith that all this hard work will not only pay off in weight loss, but it has the serious potential to change your life entirely. I have a confidence now that I haven't had since I was 16. I'm living two dreams simultaneously -- my writing career is (slowly) taking off, and I work with animals. I'm not a different person; I'm the "real" me now. And then there's the "superficial" stuff. I'm wearing size 8 jeans. I feel GOOD everytime I'm out in public. I'm happier, more relaxed, and more willing to interact with other people. I take risks now -- I do things I always wanted to do but never did because I told myself "I'm too fat" or "that takes too much effort," etc.

If there is one thing I want to tell EVERYONE, it's that all the work and struggle and frustration is absolutely, positively, without a single doubt, WORTH IT.

Tell yourself you can do it, and you can. :)

Originally Posted by fitchick2be

Congrats on the weight loss, everyone!

I understand all about *what* I need to do to lose weight. The problem is making myself *do* it. I literally want my cake and to eat it, too. I want to lose weight, but I want to stuff myself with Swiss Rolls! Any advice? Thanks in advance.

Originally Posted by susie_sunshine

I always remember a cartoon I saw in the paper one day, it had a doctor pointing to a chart that said:
1. eat less
2.exercise more
3. repeat

If only it were that simple!