[sheerwillpower]

I slowly but steadily lost the 40 pounds I needed to through a healthy reduced-calorie diet and moderate exercise. I'm now at an ideal BMI, feel comfortable being active, and am pleasantly surprised when I fit into clothes I haven't worn in ages. I wanted to know I could do it, that I could make up my mind to do something good for my physical and mental health and stick to it. I remember my obese grandmother losing almost 100 pounds when she was in her 90s and being quietly proud while I helped her take in her dresses so they'd fit her newly slim body. I decided if she could do it, then so could I.

I lost this weight to reduce my health risks, increase my probable longevity, be more mindful about what I eat, feel more in control of myself, stop avoiding mirrors, and enjoy moving my body. In other words, I did it mostly for myself. But sure, I admit I also did it in part to look better. I'm not obsessed with looks, but I like not feeling self-critical when I'm in social settings. I'm sure many of you know that critical voice whispering exaggerated, nasty things in your mind. Losing weight has definitely muffled that voice as far as my appearance goes. I've got plenty of other things to work on, thank you.

I'm not looking for a fireworks display, but it would be a little bit nice -- no, it'd be very nice -- if one of my friends or relatives asked if I'd lost weight or made some nice comment about it. Doesn't have to be a big deal, just some kind acknowledgment. But no one, absolutely no one does. It's weeiirrrd. It's like I'm invisible or something. I know 40 pounds isn't a huge amount, but it's fully a quarter of the weight I used to carry around, so I know it shows. I'm self-reliant, secure and don't rely on others to validate my self-worth -- but as a member of a society, it's strange interacting with people who, whether deliberately or unconsciously, are ignoring my weight change, especially when I know they pay attention to their own weight. They are not people prone to spite, jealousy, or meanness, so none of those explain why they act this way.

It's not a big deal, but it's made me curious. Why might people act this way? Has this happened to you?