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Old 01-21-2006, 10:50 PM   #16  
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Originally Posted by curlylocks
that was the first 280 lbs i lost (my ex) ... it really doesnt get better..But i wish u much luck ... {hugs}



I lost 210lbs my ex ... no it don't get better ......until you leave.
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Old 01-21-2006, 11:51 PM   #17  
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Default Sometimes it takes a higher power!

Are you religous? I know my husband was into to porn bad....you just don't know....but after joining church nearly 4 years ago, he has been a changed man....sometimes it takes a higher power!! You'll be in my thoughts....
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Old 01-22-2006, 12:58 AM   #18  
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Originally Posted by famograham
EM, I'm so sorry that you are going through this

I know exactly how you feel..what goes through your mind..all of it.
It is so incredibly painful..and damaging to your very soul.

You can never force him to get help if he doesn't want it..even if he goes "for you" it won't work unless he truly believes it's a problem. He will do everything and anything he can to keep both the porn and you. There's a great quote that goes... "How do you know when and addict is lying?...His lips are moving."

The very best thing for you to do, is to go and get that counseling for yourself. When we were in the worst of it, I found a wonderful counselor for myself and kept right on going until I was so sure of myself..that I was/am completely prepared to live life on my own and do a damned fabulous job of it too. Miraculously..there's been no porn going on in my house since I've had these revelations (as far as I know of course). I think it scared/scares him to know that I will TRULY be just fine without him, and that I'm fully willing and capable of doing so if he crosses that invisible line again!

I want to send you my love , my prayers , and all the strength in the world...because I really know how much this tears a woman apart.

Never forget how valuable you are
Please feel free to contact me anytime if you'd like to.
xoxo
Linda
All of these ladies gave such wonderful advice and I'd like to say an ahem to what Linda said! I'm young but I know (from past relationships) that you can't base your happiness on someone else. It *has* to be about you then. For your children you have to take control of this situation. I think counseling is a great idea, too. Tell us how you are doing. I'm sorry that anyone has to go through this. Much hugs
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