Dating while Fat
 

I'm not sure if anyone else has run into this issue, or if it's even an issue, however. I'm 23 and I graduated from college a year ago, so I'm living in a city where most of my friends are 3+ hours away and I don't go out much. I don't like spending money and I connect with most of the people I love through technology in some form.

So, when I started thinking about getting out there and looking for a romantic relationship, I went with online dating venues. I've tried a couple, and they stress me out to no end. Like, I WANT to meet people but I'm so scared that they will not like me. I think a big part of it has to do with the fact that I'm overweight. I don't ever try to hide that in my online presence, but it still stresses me out that I will meet someone in person and they'll be disgusted with me or something :(

But recently, I went on a REALLY good date, we were out all night talking (and some kissing, but that's beside the point) and we want to see each other again. I haven't been in a relationship in a couple years so I have all this anxiety about dating, and I'm afraid it's going to ruin what could be a great thing.

Does anyone else have trouble putting themselves out there like this, or is it just me on my weird fat island over here?

Yes, I did too. I met my husband on 2009. We dated a couple years and got married. I was open with him that I felt insecure. He felt insecure too.

When I first met my fiancé I was in an uncomfortably overweight stage of my life but I didn't let that stop me from getting to know him. I realized my fear was pretty silly as he clearly liked me (And still does) no matter what size I am at. You have to realize that if someone is worth it they won't care about your weight.

I was single for about five or six years before I even considered dating again (Bad breakup) and it was really tough to put myself out there but the truth is, the benefits outweigh the cons when it comes to dating. At least I find so anyway.

I'm glad you had a great date and want to see each other again. Don't let your weight stop you from a potentially good thing.

Online dating is always stressful! I went on one last sunday, and it just reminded me of how much I dislike it! I plan on trying it again though, maybe not in this town since I'm here for one more month, but it's good to push myself out of my comfort zone.
Just relax! Go on another date and enjoy yourself! Most people are more interested in a nice smile and good sense of humor than a stick thin body.

Also- I'm totally jealous how great your date was! Mine was not that awesome, but I got a free lunch out of it :p

I was in a similar situation to you. I moved to a new town for a job and didn't have many friends. I tried the online dating route and met a guy who I was very open and honest with about my weight loss journey. We dated for a few weeks but he seemed to be only interested in one thing...so things ended there.

I met another guy and we just clicked. We've been dating for over a year and just recently moved in together.

Yes, I was extremely self conscious about my weight. It made it very hard for me to date. But then I just got to a point where I didn't want to continue to put my life on hold for my weight. I was losing it and I just realized that my weight was what it was. A person could either accept me or not. It seems that you are honest with how you appear as far as your online presence so I think you're fine. So if a person is disgusted with you that is their problem. What's the worst that can happen? They stop calling you or wanting to see you? That's happened to me and yes it will sting a little but the beauty of online dating is that there will be five more guys lined up to take his place.

Don't stress it too much and just have a fun time!

I love hearing all your success stories, and I'm so happy you are all in good places with your relationships :)

RetroRabbit--Right?! I get really stressed out about it, and I'm always so worried about the smallest things. And trust me, I've had some BAD dates. One a couple months ago was so bad I had my best friend call me and pretend there was an emergency so I could leave. But there will be good ones!

Update: We hung out again and it's still going well. This is new for me because my only real relationship started in high school, lasted 3 years, and we never did the "dating" thing. Plus he cheated on me a lot, so it's not comparable. I have my fingers crossed that this is turning into something good, but it's also pushing me to be more consistent and committed to my health goals!

But anyway, thanks :)

I was slim when I met my first husband, and then gained weight while married. After the divorce I lost a lot of weight and then met someone else... gained weight again... now I'm single again and trying to lose some weight.

I do have this mental roadblock that men won't be attracted to me unless I am slim. I hate it, I know it's wrong and I'm selling myself short.

recently I had a date... and it went great, and I completely feel he could not care less about my weight. but I still want to lose.